New tell a story game

[night-owl]

Once apon a timethere was no ice cubes left at the bar, so for a whole week and a day everyone drank warm diet coke with vodka and lime. Then a polar bear gave maddona and britney permission to movein with santa claus for eternity. This christmas briteny lost her marbles down the elves stocking. maddona then wriggled into a pair of leather chaps partnerd with wellingtons and leg warmers. meanwhile santa claus was skinny dipping with mr grinch who danced the tango all night shaking violently. All fairyfolk laughed and jeered untill santas beard curled so much it fell off. Mrs christmas laughed and collapsed at the feet of the BIGGEST elf that ever lived, he looked at everyone in such a wry and nasty way that they all suddenly laughed with glee as Maddona appeared naked holding Britney's knickers, swinging them from her fingertips! Santa looked aroused but wondered how cold Britney's bum felt after she straddled a polar bear without using her saddle, this resulted in chaffing her sensitive areas. Thats why she went bald! Madonna was relieved that Santa wasn't looking as old as her. That night Santa gave Madonna a tub containing frogspawn, she sniffed it and inhaled the sweet fragrance, exclaiming how distinctive frogspawn tasted, almost as tasty as tripe. Britney passed wind which sounded like two wilderbeasts fighting outside in the snow. Meanwhile, back at Santa's grotto the elves were plotting evil plans before the log fire. After Christmas they hatched a seagull which was strange as they'd implanted the sac with nuts. Madonna ate the elves garlic bread, then farted loudly what a smell it produced! Without thinking, Santa kissed Madonna on the nose then fell madly in love. "Darling, i want to gargle noisily with choc-mint." It exploded, coating the inside of his sack, "Oh Madonna, I have something hard between my left thigh and my right thigh that grows roses every few months. What do you think we should do with it? Madonna laughed uncontrolably, snorting icing-sugar, Kate Moss giggled at Santa's small sleigh bells which looked very rusty indeed. "Why did they go rusty, fall off and disintegrate?" Santa asked.

The time ticked away, days came and went. Whatever they did wasn't working. "I really wish it hadn't slipped down all uncovered, but unfortunately there it sat, flopping about like a limp squib. Help was not anywhere to be found, Santa sighed "What will I do? I can't get it up or get my bells to ring without feeling around inside my trouser leg for ages." "Well...well." Madonna said "Why so sad Santa?"
"Maybe it's your fault!"
Britney awoke from dreaming of cucumbers coated with chocolate sauce and nuts. Licking her toes was painful. Licking wallpaper turned her green. "Kevin! What is it with Santa's pants? Why is his winkle hanging limply?"
"Well, it's because he rubbed Bio oil on, it's all smooth on top. Underneath it's wrinkled and very green," said Kevin.
Britney looked puzzled. "Green?"
"Yes"
"Wow! That's, like,disgusting yet funny!"

Madonna thought Rhydian might ask whether she knew Sharon's phone number so that she could give her a call. But Sharon said "F**king hell Rhydian why would I do anything so stupid? F**K off you moron! Bloody useless man, typical f**k YOU!!" Flouncing Madonna flounced around, pouting, preening, sulking. Until finally she gave in, "OK, pass the 'Worcester directory, Chip Shops are employing gnomes, goblins, elves, merpeople and astronauts. Why? Cheap skates always after cheap staff, paying next to nothing wages, i'm desperate for another job! Hey! Guy shall bounce fluffy off the wall. I smell employment!'

The wind whistled, the rain soaked through clothing. When it finally saturated Santa's underpants, he stripped down to his red fur posing pouch and scratched beneath unknown folds of unwashed skin, the skin smelt eggy. It looked manky. Miraculously Tinkerbell managed fly-fishing while waving her wand towards Santa's nuts. Coastguard? Where's that Hasslehoff package gone? "Ah there it is in between his drawers under the pig". Unfortunately the pig decided to drop his expectations resulting in a pregnancy.Santa was amazed, astonished and disgusted, he vomited.
The next morning Santa received his invitation to join the local monastery. Time to cure his bad habits for good. He was going to have to clean up his act (and a lot of other things too!)
At 7pm it was time for Confession...He prayed for the pregnant pig, he hoped she knew who the father was. If she didn't he would have to ring the Jeremy Kyle show and tell

[Angela1]

The Priest asked if he minded wearing a black robe instead of a red suit and Santa told a lie. I suppose in a way he didn't mind because he had kept his red fur posing pouch on underneath his robes. Washing in cold water each morning wasn't doing him any good either. The red pouch was now too big. Thoughts of the pig and Jeremy Kyle soon sorted that.

[Snowbaby]

The wind whistled, the rain soaked through clothing. When it finally saturated Santa's underpants, he stripped down to his red fur posing pouch and scratched beneath unknown folds of unwashed skin, the skin smelt eggy. It looked manky. Miraculously Tinkerbell managed fly-fishing while waving her wand towards Santa's nuts. Coastguard? Where's that Hasslehoff package gone? "Ah there it is in between his drawers under the pig". Unfortunately the pig decided to drop his expectations resulting in a pregnancy.Santa was amazed, astonished and disgusted, he vomited.
The next morning Santa received his invitation to join the local monastery. Time to cure his bad habits for good. He was going to have to clean up his act (and a lot of other things too!)
At 7pm it was time for Confession...He prayed for the pregnant pig, he hoped she knew who the father was. If she didn't he would have to ring the Jeremy Kyle show and tell the nation

[IMac]

The wind whistled, the rain soaked through clothing. When it finally saturated Santa's underpants, he stripped down to his red fur posing pouch and scratched beneath unknown folds of unwashed skin, the skin smelt eggy. It looked manky. Miraculously Tinkerbell managed fly-fishing while waving her wand towards Santa's nuts. Coastguard? Where's that Hasslehoff package gone? "Ah there it is in between his drawers under the pig". Unfortunately the pig decided to drop his expectations resulting in a pregnancy.Santa was amazed, astonished and disgusted, he vomited.
The next morning Santa received his invitation to join the local monastery. Time to cure his bad habits for good. He was going to have to clean up his act (and a lot of other things too!)
At 7pm it was time for Confession...He prayed for the pregnant pig, he hoped she knew who the father was. If she didn't he would have to ring the Jeremy Kyle show and tell the nation pregnancy

[Snowbaby]

The wind whistled, the rain soaked through clothing. When it finally saturated Santa's underpants, he stripped down to his red fur posing pouch and scratched beneath unknown folds of unwashed skin, the skin smelt eggy. It looked manky. Miraculously Tinkerbell managed fly-fishing while waving her wand towards Santa's nuts. Coastguard? Where's that Hasslehoff package gone? "Ah there it is in between his drawers under the pig". Unfortunately the pig decided to drop his expectations resulting in a pregnancy.Santa was amazed, astonished and disgusted, he vomited.
The next morning Santa received his invitation to join the local monastery. Time to cure his bad habits for good. He was going to have to clean up his act (and a lot of other things too!)
At 7pm it was time for Confession...He prayed for the pregnant pig, he hoped she knew who the father was. If she didn't he would have to ring the Jeremy Kyle show and tell the nation pregnancy kits for pigs

[Angela1]

Meanwhile this monastery had a matron only it was a monk. He fortunately was a very caring man and his intentions were mainly good. He did a cleanliness check on the brothers in Santa's dormitory this week and discovered the reason for the unpleasant smell coming from the room. All rat poison and skunk invasion granules were removed and Santa was sent for a bath and fumigation. All clothing was to be boiled. While he was soaking the red velour posing pouch went with Santa's other clothes to be boiled. However, our friendly well meaning matron monk cut a pattern from the now clean and fresh smelling(not for long) pouch with the intention of doing something with it.

[clairehartford]

once upon a time there was no ice cubes left at the bar so for my