My thoughts on what has been concerning me most while on my vlcd

[Dancing]

I love food. I really do.

I read on here and other sites about how people who have been on a vlcd for a few months don't think about food so much, have no desire to eat the "wrong" thing when they go back to eating conventional food, how they forget to take all their packs, etc.

It isn't like that for me and it really worries me.

I like soups, shakes made into mousses, shakes made in to smoothies, shakes hot with coffee, shakes cold, shakes with ice, tetras in coffee, tetras made into mousse, tetras frozen into icecream, soups made into savoury muffins, shakes made into muffins.

And every day I have a dilemma of how to use only 4 packs (thank goodness I'm tall and can have 4 not just 3!!!) to the best effect when my mouth wants to experience all the different flavours and textures.

On an add a meal week, I start off thinking I won't have any at all and just stick to packs. Then I might have a bit of chicken breast or quorn. Today I have just been to shop and I wanted to buy a bit of everything I'm allowed - when I'm only going to have one tiny aam today and another tomorrow .... I just find it so difficult to stop at one thing and be satisfied with that.

I love cooking and when I go back to conventional eating I want to be able to cook good, healthy food because I genuinely enjoy it - BUT I keep wondering how I'm going to pace myself and not want to cook a different dish each night. Part of the problem is I live alone so it is very difficult to cook a meal for yourself without having left over ingredients or loads of extra portions. Yes, I can freeze the extra portions but if I want to experience a different food each night, then my freezer will be overflowing with meals.

And, being honest, I have a cupboard with sweets and other junky things from NZ which I can't wait to have once I lose my weight. But the thoughts in my head when I think about it are around how I can limit myself to just a few a day at most when I want to experience all the different tastes, etc. A part of me thinks that once I'm eating again, I'll just eat them all in a few days and then they are gone and I won't have the problem to deal with anymore. And, NO, I WON'T be throwing them out before I finish my diet. Yes, I would live if I did but to think about it causes a mild anxiety - how bizarre, and what is that about?

I think about food almost as much as I did before I was on the diet. I started out on LL so I know about the thought diaries, etc.

There is a fear hidden there somewhere I think - I don't let myself think about how it might be if I did just throw away the sweets in the cupboard. I don't think there is a fear connected to my wanting to taste everything at once - unless it is somehow connected with a fear of lack.

How am I going to avoid putting the weight back on????

Of course, I have in my head that I'm going to be a size 12 when I finish this and I won't let myself get any larger than a 12 - size 14 over christmas maybe . But that is okay in theory - how will I maintain it in reality when I still have thoughts of overeating. And it isn't really about the sweets and stuff in my cupboard - I don't normally eat them. I am a healthy eater 80% of the time. My problem has always been eating too much. And it seems as though nothing is changing in that regard.

It is this instant gratification thing - I hate it

Can anyone help?

[Shazpaz]

I'm the same as you hun. I'm thinking about food all the time. I did take a break from November and have just restarted Lipotrim. In between I didn't gain any weight yet I ate all the things I shouldn't. The difference with me is portion size. If I fancied some cake on holiday I had a piece, but instead of it being a quarter of the cake I had a small piece. The same was true with pizza. If my hubby got a pizza in the past he would choose the largest size and I'd have half and so would he. Before I went back on lipotrim, we'd order a medium size and I'd have one piece with a HUGE salad. I'd savour every mouthful. The thing is we cannot go back to eating the way we used to. If we do then we WILL gain the weight, not might, but will. Unfortunately we are going to have a fight with food for the rest of our lives.......as my pharmasist said.......a fat person is a fat person for life (like an alcoholic) it doesn't magicallly go away once we reach target. He said we are renting a slim body and if we go back to eating then we end up back where we started and more.

We just have to learn self control. Having a bit of what you fancy sometimes does you good. Once at goal, then I'm going to be good 80% of the time and the other 20% be well and truely naughty!

Good luck hun.
xx

[Porgeous]

Hi Dancing, what a great and honest post. I too have been reflecting on maintenance issues but from a slightly different perspective but will go into that in a mo.

Perhaps you are expecting too much from yourself, it could be considered an unreasonable expectation that you will never again think of food in the same way that you did. We are talking about a life time of habits that have to be unlearned and I for one don't believe several months of abstinence alone can correct that. We are ultimately the same people that we were before and from a psychological point of view will still have the same issues with food - it's how we manage them that is the key to success. Whilst you still have all these thoughts and cravings about food you are able to resist them and that is a crucial point to hold onto. I think the other thing to remember is that you aren't suddenly going to cross and finishing line which then enables you to eat everything and anything that you want. It should be a gradual process whereby you are on the 1500 plan and then you very slowly start to introduce new foods and not a case of on Monday your on CD hit goal and Tuesday and eat whatever you want if you see what I mean.

My feelings have been from a completely different direction but now I think about it more maybe it comes down to the same thing. I have reached a point where I can't imagine eating something that is unhealthy, can't visualise making a conscious decision to have a slice of cake. It has become this huge big deal in my head of "when will the moment come that I consciously decide to have a treat". I have become so into the routine that when I get cravings I have learnt to always question whether it is psychological or physical hunger causing them and I can't stop myself doing this. Until reading your post I was convinced I was developing a really unhealthy view of balancing healthy eating with the odd treats but in reality my thoughts may be more closely lnked with yours than I originally thought. I think the underlying fear is that once I start with the junk I won't be able to stop, in order to find out I have to take the risk but hell what a risk...

Sorry I am rambling and not really helping much. I suppose what I am trying to say is that I don't believe for one moment that your feelings are anything other than completely normal and I worry that you are putting too much pressure on yourself to be a completely transformed person psychologically as well as physically. You're awareness and willingness to think about these concerns can only serve to help you when you move into maintenance.

Georgie
xx

[Dancing]

Thanks to you both.

Georgie, your post made me a bit tearful so there must be something in it that has hit a nerve. One thing I want to mention is that in January 2006 I made a concerted effort to eat 100% healthy food. I prepared all my own food, NEVER bought anything prepared from a shop. Never ate anything but the healthiest food possible. I did this for 6 months and during that time I was like you are now Georgie - could not imagine ever wanting to eat anything "unnatural" again. If I had need for something to eat while I was out and about - because I was genuinely hungry - I would walk into a shop to buy something - see there was nothing available that was on my healthy list and walk out until I found somewhere selling apples or something. I was not remotely interested in eating anything other than healthy food and could not imagine the day I did. Then the switch turned in my head and (I can't remember what the first thing I ate was) I ate something off plan. I think I had been ill and feeling down. Then there was no turning back and I put on 5 stone in a year.

I think this experience is part of what concerns me - I've learned I can't rely on that great state of mind to always be there. Things can be going perfectly and then one day I might find myself caught unawares again - let's face it, I won't be doing a thought diary every day in the future!!!

I think I will have to remind myself to always be making the distinction between physical and psychological hunger and reminding myself of the consequences of psychological hunger.

Re. the suddenly reaching goal and eating thing .... my small confession (maybe not that small) is that I was thinking I'd have a blow out the weekend I got to goal THEN go back and work my way through the plans .... because it just seems so long since I've been not able to taste food (even though I had a break over christmas - I think it is because that break didn't involve me cooking the foods I wanted to as i was on holiday so didn't cook at all).

I truely believe I would get back on plan after the mini blow out. But I guess it isn't the right thing to do. Then I tell myself, well, it is a good way to practice constraint. To see that I really can stop and get back on plan when I say I will - - - or am I just playing a mind game there?

Well, I have to go off and do a little bit of work now. Thanks for the replies - they have been good food for thought!

x

[paul1978]

I think about this quite a lot. I keep thinking 'how can having 3 or 4 shakes a day for however long teach you to eat healthily with normal food?' When we go back to eating normal food completely, will we know how much to eat/not to eat, the correct portion sizes to eat etc .... ??!???

[Porgeous]

This is really fascinating me, although we all express ourselves differently and maybe it manifests itself in different behaviours the underlying habits and concerns are scarily similar.

You are spot on with the state of mind thing, I think it may have been Mike or KD that talked about motivation not being something you could rely on for ever as you can't possibly stay as motivated as day 1 forever and need to find other ways of managing cravings. I know exactly what you mean about the healthy eating switch suddenly being turned off. One thing I thought I would try initially is to only allow myself a treat if I am eating out, ie, not to keep anything unhealthy in the house initially so a desert when I am eating out cannot turn into a full on binge quite so easily - not sure if this will work though!

Re your intended blow out being a good way to practice constraint - one question I would ask is do blow out and restraint sit well in the same sentence? I can totally see where you are coming from and I too have had the same debates in my head especially about it being a good way to practice but I would worry that you are giving your mind and body mixed messages.

Keep reminding yourself that you can experience all these flavours and textures you crave, you can experiment with cooking new recipies and enjoying a varied diet - you just don't have to do it all in one day!!

Great thread, really enjoying thinking about this more.

Don't work too hard.

Gx

[Porgeous]

I think about this quite a lot. I keep thinking 'how can having 3 or 4 shakes a day for however long teach you to eat healthily with normal food?' When we go back to eating normal food completely, will we know how much to eat/not to eat, the correct portion sizes to eat etc .... ??!???

Hi Paul

If you work through the CD plans they do teach you alot about portion sizes and healthy balanced food, the danger is on reintroducing some of our old trigger foods and controlling those so they don't turn into binges. You are right to be thinking about maintenance so early on as this is ultimately the key to long term success but try not to let it cause you too much concern during the early part of your weight loss journey.

Georgie
x

[Porgeous]

I'm on a roll now Dancing... it's all your fault!!

One other thought I would share which has come from chatting to Diva - alot of what we do or don't achieve comes down to our attitude towards it. I have made a real effort to stop doubting that I will be able to maintain and start believing that I can do it. I remember when I first started CD I was plagued with doubts about whether I would be able to stick to it, if I would end up giving up and just be another failed attempt. However, one day my mindset switched and for the first time I truly believed I could actually achieve my goal and that it would be a reality - from that moment I found SS and CD easy. I am trying to adopt the same attitude to maintenance, rather than being filled with the same self doubt I am focusing on just being able to do it.... not quite there yet but working on it and certainly feeling more positive and less scared than I was!!

Gxx

[Shazpaz]

My feelings have been from a completely different direction but now I think about it more maybe it comes down to the same thing. I have reached a point where I can't imagine eating something that is unhealthy, can't visualise making a conscious decision to have a slice of cake. It has become this huge big deal in my head of "when will the moment come that I consciously decide to have a treat".

I think its fab that you can think like that. I personally have to have the treats. On the three month break from the diet, on Mon - Fri I still did low carb/cal. I did weight watchers if I did fancy some carbs...i.e. a dessert or biscuit.....I'd never just eat something fattening. But then on a Friday I'd go out for a curry with hubby. I'd choose a fish starter, a tandoori main meal, just one spoon of rice and a tiny bit of naan bread. I also had a glass of red wine and a lovely coffee with after eight mint to finish. In the past I'd have a plate full of rice, a curry with a sauce and half a naan bread. A bottle of wine, a dessert and an irish coffee to finish. Although I say I'm having my blow out on a Friday I suppose I am making better choices now.

I have to have treats and a social life. I really enjoy going out for meals and drinks etc, but limit the amount of times I go out and when I do go out, I choose very carefully.

I want to enjoy life. Its too short to spend all your time worrying, but I know the quality of my life would be worse if I was to gain the weight back and more. Its a case of balance with me. Balancing going out, having fun with my family, restricting myself, but not too much that I dont enjoy life............if you understand my rambles.

Sharonxx

[KD]

I just find it so difficult to stop at one thing and be satisfied with that.

BUT I keep wondering how I'm going to pace myself and not want to cook a different dish each night. Part of the problem is I live alone so it is very difficult to cook a meal for yourself without having left over ingredients or loads of extra portions.

Oh wow! I can really relate to this. I'm the same. For example, say I want to have a load of veg. I would rather have 10 very small different types, than 3 larger portions of 3 types.

Or if I'm 'allowing' myself 3 biscuits, I would rather have 6 halves, each one different. But practically, it doesn't always work like that. Short of buying a whole tin of variety biscuits, or 6 packets and letting some go stale....or eating them all

Did you know that the first two bites of anything has the most flavour? Unless you are hungry, everything after those two bites is more to do with feeding your habit.

Yes, I can freeze the extra portions but if I want to experience a different food each night, then my freezer will be overflowing with meals

The freezer is my best friend I'm seriously considering buying a 3rd but somethings I didn't want to freeze. Not suitable and all that.

When I finished Cambridge, I knew that I wanted to learn to control the unhealthy and healthy types of foods rather than deny myself them. I bought variety packs of treat size sweets. I divided them up, even cutting treat sized ones into two and I bagged them into individual ziploc bags and small boxes.

I did this for anything that couldn't be frozen. Oh, and frozen ones two if I could. Then I planned, and planned and planned. What could I have each day. Working on sell buy dates etc.

Some things just don't work like that. Fruit for example goes discoloured after a while.

Anyway, once you get into a routine, you then get the greatest lesson of all. Learning control. Learning how to make the desire to taste 'now' into the realisation that you can have it later, tomorrow, next week.

I do remember walking around thinking that I would just like a spoonful of everything that had ever been created though

Life isn't like that unfortunately. Life is hard and food is easy , but we get there and find a way that makes it work without feeling deprived or having to throw away too much.

[debz32]

I'm on a roll now Dancing... it's all your fault!!

One other thought I would share which has come from chatting to Diva - alot of what we do or don't achieve comes down to our attitude towards it. I have made a real effort to stop doubting that I will be able to maintain and start believing that I can do it. I remember when I first started CD I was plagued with doubts about whether I would be able to stick to it, if I would end up giving up and just be another failed attempt. However, one day my mindset switched and for the first time I truly believed I could actually achieve my goal and that it would be a reality - from that moment I found SS and CD easy. I am trying to adopt the same attitude to maintenance, rather than being filled with the same self doubt I am focusing on just being able to do it.... not quite there yet but working on it and certainly feeling more positive and less scared than I was!!

Gxx

Great post Georgie (as always......!)

thanks for sharing your thoughts......

Debz xx

[Dancing]

I would rather have 10 very small different types, than 3 larger portions of 3 types.

Oh yes - this is me! And I'm even like that with things other than food - for instance I'd rather have loads of small christmas presents than one big one

Did you know that the first two bites of anything has the most flavour? Unless you are hungry, everything after those two bites is more to do with feeding your habit..

nope, I didn't know that and it is going to another useful bit of information that will help me succeed.

The freezer is my best friend I'm seriously considering buying a 3rd .

????!!! 3!! LOL

I bought variety packs of treat size sweets. I divided them up, even cutting treat sized ones into two and I bagged them into individual ziploc bags and small boxes.

I did this for anything that couldn't be frozen. Oh, and frozen ones two if I could. Then I planned, and planned and planned. What could I have each day. Working on sell buy dates etc..

A good idea, I'll use this technique


Yes, Georgie
I get what you mean about the attitude and I am one to practice positive thinking but sometimes I need reminding of it. So thanks. As soon as I read what you wrote I felt tension leave my body and that "yes, I'm doing this, I an do this" - so another thing that I will have to keep reminding myself off in more challenging times .... I'm going to have to make a list of all these things and put them up somewhere to remind me of them.

"Re your intended blow out being a good way to practice constraint - one question I would ask is do blow out and restraint sit well in the same sentence? I can totally see where you are coming from and I too have had the same debates in my head especially about it being a good way to practice but I would worry that you are giving your mind and body mixed messages."

Good point about the mixed messages - I'll consider it a bit more.

[Delli]

i agree with Debz, lots of thought-provoking stuff here, from dancing and georgie.

[KD]

one question I would ask is do blow out and restraint sit well in the same sentence?

Yes it does. It's just that most people call it 'being normal'

It's how much you 'blow out' or restrain that defines whether you are still a dieter, or eating normally I reckon.

[KD]

I get what you mean about the attitude and I am one to practice positive thinking but sometimes I need reminding of it.

Me too Occassionally, I sink so low that not only do I forget the technique, but when it pops up into my mind again, I'm just so darn annoyed that I'm supposed to think that way.......

It's an incredibly powerful technique though. The New Thought movement is gaining more apostles who believe that just by wanting something enough, and believing that they have it, they can anything materialistic 'appear'. To me that is self help gone crazy, but it can really make your behaviour change.

It's just remembering to do it that can be a problem