Ramblings of a Bee on Exante

Right, this is it now! I've been meaning to start a diary for ages and now seems the perfect time. I'm finding myself flagging and I figured the only way to keep my nose above water right now is to start rambling in my very own diary (after hijacking many other threads previously).
I've nearly completed four weeks of Exante, the first three were going fine but these last few days have been an absolute struggle. I came on this morning so I blame my hormones. I had a few low carb snacks over the weekend but they seemed to have made it worse because now eating is all I think about.
I just placed a Tesco's order online for my visitors this weekend and I couldn't stop salivating over it, so I booked the delivery slot for after their arrival so I wouldn't cave in in front of them coz I've already told them about my diet. Hopefully it'll help.
I'll be eating out twice over the weekend and on past diets, I would have taken that as an excuse to blow my diet. And I'm really fighting that inner urge to do the same thing again. I really want to stay 100% until Friday. Only the fat person part of my brain is telling me I need to eat to cope with the tension. So I made a plan for tonight (coz evenings are the worst, and I got to plan one at a time at the moment). Soon as I'm through the door, I'll be hoovering the whole house, put all my washing away, have a long hot shower and will then have my pack and straight to bed basically.
Isn't it amazing how you can start this process all guns blazing and nothing is going to stop you....and then your emotions turn on you and you feel miserable. *sniff* Aaaanyways, I'm sure it's just a few days and I'll be back to my jolly semi-energetic self. Fingers crossed!

Hi Bee. You and I have similar losses and the same goal weight! I've seen a lot of people don't have a meal a day during food week but I am and hopefully it will kick start my loss. You'll soon be back to being motivated. I find my mood changes day to day as well as how hungry I am. I started 3 weeks leave from work this week and am trying to avoid thinking about food by taking the dog for long walks. He's certainly enjoying it! When you think of it, 12lb loss in 3 weeks is absolutlely amazing! If you lose a stone a month you'll have reached your target weight by Christmas!

Thanks Lynne, I know I definitely couldn't see this through without this forum. I find myself turning to it all the time for distraction and motivation. Hope your annual leave goes well, having more time on your hands will be a challenge but you've already got a "game plan" and that's the key I think. What I found quite amazing was that after a few snacks yesterday I didn't sleep well at all. I think my stomach is getting used to the small portions and having more all of a sudden just makes me feel quite unwell. I'm really gonna try and remember that feeling when tempted next weekend...

Hi Bee

Sounds like TOTM is playing a big part on how your feeling this week, not due mine till end of the month and am not looking forward to battling my hormones lol

Keep going your doing great xx

Thanks Nat, I'm sure you're right, although it doesn't make it easier, it is good to know what's causing the cravings and for the time being I've just got to battle through them.

You must have nearly finished your second week, how are you getting on?

Hi Bee
i'm the same as you the last few days. Think I'm on 6/7th week and I haven't even faltered with wanting carby food until this weekend. Man it's been a tough few days. My little one was a handful and I'm due on which doesn't usually affect me but I've switched from 22yrs on the pill to the coil and I am evil witch of west, although south west to be more geographically correct! Want this week to be over already!
Stick with it though chick as the hard work has been done x

Yes, it's true, wouldn't want to undo everything again, it's been hard enough getting here, can't believe I've completed nearly four weeks now! Seems like I've just started. I'm so glad to have stayed 100% all day, not even a sneaky low carb snack, nothing. About to go to bed now. Really need a good night's sleep now, rough night last night and work's been hard on me. I think because ultimately turning to food has always been the way to cope, it's quite hard when you're actually taking that comfort blanket away and deal with the real issues. Another day tomorrow, and then another one after... It'll all be worth it

Feeling good about myself today having stuck to TS 100% yesterday despite temptation. A dull rainy day today, but I'm feeling chipper

My bra strap keeps scratching my shoulder blade and is driving me insane!! I think it might be a particularly pointy loose thread on the inside of the strap but it's sooo annoying! Every time I wear it, it happens and so it goes to the back of the drawer. And then a few weeks go by and I think I haven't worn this in a while, this is pretty. And as soon as I'm fully dressed and out of the house, it starts scratching me again! Arrrgh!

When I have a scratchy bit on a bra I run over that area with my nail file and it usually gets rid of whatever was annoying me

Oh good idea jael, thanks! Must try that. Ooooh man, I am so hormonal. Could totally cry my eyes out over something in work just now. And I know I'm completely overreacting, and yet can't seem to stop myself. Deep breaths...

This diet can make you more hormonal than normal. I had some pretty bad days in the first few weeks where all I wanted to do was cry, and actually a couple of weeks ago again, I was really miserable.

Its so normal hun. I always feel very emotional when I am on TS. Good luck on your exante journey.

Thanks for the encouragement. Knowing the reasons does help a bit, doesn't it. I feel better right now, but earlier I could have thrown things whilst uncontrollably sobbing (over an email that was late coming through, at least it's all in proportion eh )
Also, a little theory of mine is that, as fat stores a lot of insulin which is a hormone it might also store others, and when you lose a lot quickly, they get released... don't quote me on it hehe.

thats a really good way of looking at it Bee!!

had to have a laugh at your little ramble on about your bra strap - made me giggle lol!

im exactly the same - i am sooo stressed out with everything at the minute and my fiance made me cry last night by having a joke about my hair (i had just got it done) and i ended up hysterically sobbing for over and hour and there was no calming me down at all! lol

Hope your feeling better soon!! and stay away from the food - i find the chocolate shakes and the chocolate ultra slim bars really helped me when mine was here??

I would love to get hold of the ultra slim bars but my tesco store doesn't seem to stock it. So will have a little search next time I'm near another one, living out in the sticks is a bit tricky sometimes.
I get so terribly flustered when I'm on, earlier someone came in and asked if I could take a photocopy of this document he had and it was double sided and I couldn't remember which way to put the paper in so it would print on both sides. Goodness.
It's WI tomorrow, not terribly hopeful but I've been more or less on plan with a couple of WS days. Maybe I just feel fatter due to totm.

Ok, had my WI this morning. 3.5 lb down!! I couldn't believe it, went on three times but came out with the same result. I am so chuffed. Didn't feel like I had lost at all, probably with all the bloatyness from totm I just felt ... heavy. Whoop!!

That's brilliant! Well done.

Good news! Well done!

Bee u are funny.well done on staying 100%. Ive got a tricky week ahead, meal out with work and few days at caravan with friends and kids. I must stay focused!! Xx