Bee's Journey v 2.0

beelishy

beelishy

......gettin' it done.
Hello!

I worked it out. My shiny new diary. Awwww. *sparkles*

Well this feels weird. I feel like Im a rat who has abandoned a sinking ship. My old diary (see link below - if i can manage to figure out how to add it) was getting bogged down with failed attempts and silliness. But it starts out GREAT! Story of my life, eh?

This one's gonna start out great too. But its gonna STAY great. Because I'M gonna stay great. Not perfect. Not without faults or fails. Lets be real...lol. But Im going to try try try try to shake off this weird "I cant be bothered" feeling that has plagued me. This sense of entitlement - "I DESERVE to stuff my face with chocolate/chips/crisps". Because, honestly...that is just silly talk. I dont deserve or not deserve it. It isnt about deserve. Somehow I have got this into my head lately. Maybe its because Ive been kicking a dead horse with the VLCD thing for far too long. Or maybe its really guilt and me beating myself up for "allowing" myself to gain some weight back. maybe its something else completely. Either way...its not good. It isnt nice and it isnt healthy and it stops right now. (Ok.....actually, it stopped last night.)

So here we go. Back to a healthier place, mentally and emotionally which will then IN THEORY facilitate my being in a healthier place physically (i.e. - able to stick with the plan and get the VLCD working for me again, properly).

:bliss:
 
beelishy said:
Hello!

I worked it out. My shiny new diary. Awwww. *sparkles*

Well this feels weird. I feel like Im a rat who has abandoned a sinking ship. My old diary (see link below - if i can manage to figure out how to add it) was getting bogged down with failed attempts and silliness. But it starts out GREAT! Story of my life, eh?

This one's gonna start out great too. But its gonna STAY great. Because I'M gonna stay great. Not perfect. Not without faults or fails. Lets be real...lol. But Im going to try try try try to shake off this weird "I cant be bothered" feeling that has plagued me. This sense of entitlement - "I DESERVE to stuff my face with chocolate/chips/crisps". Because, honestly...that is just silly talk. I dont deserve or not deserve it. It isnt about deserve. Somehow I have got this into my head lately. Maybe its because Ive been kicking a dead horse with the VLCD thing for far too long. Or maybe its really guilt and me beating myself up for "allowing" myself to gain some weight back. maybe its something else completely. Either way...its not good. It isnt nice and it isnt healthy and it stops right now. (Ok.....actually, it stopped last night.)

So here we go. Back to a healthier place, mentally and emotionally which will then IN THEORY facilitate my being in a healthier place physically (i.e. - able to stick with the plan and get the VLCD working for me again, properly).

:bliss:
Click to expand...

Welcome to the dark side lol!!
 
Food so far today:

babybel (i had forgotten about that in my earlier post. haha oops)
1x 4/day shake (oh god..cinnamony banana frozen deliciousnesss *homer drool*
1x spag bol
2x boiled eggs
1x pancake (but i made it into 2 and still have the other one for later because we all know that i will be ravenous come about 7pm)

i still have my quorn and veggies left to have for tea tonight. and i have 2 MORE eggs if sh!t gets serious. hahaha. sheesh.
 
OH! and. AND AND AND.

We ordered more packs. Exante has a 2 boxes for 90quid dealio going on. So i got 2 boxes of pancakes (of course) but....they threw in a free gadgety watch thing (i dunno..heart rate? summat-or-other. hahah) AND a FREE a box of 5 choc orange bars. Now. Of course, i dont really care for them. I mean...I can eat them but would NEVER PAY money for them. But isnt it funny how I was JUST talking about not being able to cope when we go out (see old diary) and needing to get some bars ...AND THEN THEY GAVE ME SOME FOR FREE. Awesome! I also ordered 2 lemon ones (4/day plan though ...the normal 3/days were sold out) as it was Bogof.

woohoo. So I got all that AND DELIVERY (on monday) for like 93quid. pfft. BARGAIN. Of course, I had to dip into the "saving to take the kids to disney next year" fund to pay for it (hello..worst parents EVER EVER AND ONE LAST EVERRRR) but...you know..needs must. Better we set back the holiday (it wont really) than we LEAVE OUR KIDS PARENTLESS BECAUSE WE ATE TOO MUCH CHOCOLATE AND STAYED FAT. Its an investment in our future as a family, right? Ugh. worst mom ever. srsly. lol
 
beelishy said:
Ohhh I havent just started. Hahaha. Ive been doing SS and Exante for....years now. :/ Im on restart icantremembertherehavebeensomany. And thursday was my first week WI. :)

Have you just started exante? xx
Click to expand...

Lol!!!! Well at least ya never give up hehe :)

Yup... Day four total solution cause I wasn't allowed do lipotrim anymore...

I did two small stints of lipotrim and due to refeeding twice for my dear friends hens and wedding the pharmacist told me I couldn't use lipotrim forvanother six months and im still 19lb from target so I thought sod that.. Final stretch and from being on here I'd read about exante and got a great deal so I'm on day 4 of 36 to hopefully get down to or close to target... Then refeed and that's it for shakes for me :)

That's the plan anyway :) I haven't broken it so far so fingers crossed anyway :)
 
Last edited:
beelishy said:
OH! and. AND AND AND.

We ordered more packs. Exante has a 2 boxes for 90quid dealio going on. So i got 2 boxes of pancakes (of course) but....they threw in a free gadgety watch thing (i dunno..heart rate? summat-or-other. hahah) AND a FREE a box of 5 choc orange bars. Now. Of course, i dont really care for them. I mean...I can eat them but would NEVER PAY money for them. But isnt it funny how I was JUST talking about not being able to cope when we go out (see old diary) and needing to get some bars ...AND THEN THEY GAVE ME SOME FOR FREE. Awesome! I also ordered 2 lemon ones (4/day plan though ...the normal 3/days were sold out) as it was Bogof.

woohoo. So I got all that AND DELIVERY (on monday) for like 93quid. pfft. BARGAIN. Of course, I had to dip into the "saving to take the kids to disney next year" fund to pay for it (hello..worst parents EVER EVER AND ONE LAST EVERRRR) but...you know..needs must. Better we set back the holiday (it wont really) than we LEAVE OUR KIDS PARENTLESS BECAUSE WE ATE TOO MUCH CHOCOLATE AND STAYED FAT. Its an investment in our future as a family, right? Ugh. worst mom ever. srsly. lol
Click to expand...

I'm not gonna lie I wee'd a little reading that bahahaha
 
Noooo I just lost my post I'm a jerk! !

God has been looking out for us today hello bars and overtime! ! I'm gonna go all bible belt on your ass

Feeling so optimistic this time it just feels right :) let's just look forward

You know that Greek or roman god that looks forward and back? My friend got a tattoo of it and I was like 'you should get the back one with a blindfold on' I'm so fkn deep

Must check out the site if the offers ends before payday I'll dip into the Xmas savings haha and join you in the bad mum club ;) they're only my savings though I'm not gonna go all Arthur fowler :) (Bee that will mean nothing to you haha its from Eastenders years ago)

Woo! We're so going to succeed this time. We ARE!
 
DN, you know everyone is welcome here. Its very real and no frills but come one, come all.


Lou.....hahaha PRAISE BE!!! I should probably flagellationalize myself IN THANKS FOR THE FREE BARS. JEEEZUZ TAKE THE WHEEL ...er...no...the FAT. (sorry if anyone is actually religious!) ahem.

So I went to wilko this morning (I was actually waiting for the bank to open and wilko is over the road...so we were killing time) and I ended up getting the girls one of those chocolate lollies with the super cute foil wrappers (in this case T's was Frozen and Z's was Peppa) and then you get the wrapper off and realized you just paid 60p a pop for a plain, cheap chocolate lolly. *sad times*. Anyway. The girls like them. So I got them those and I handed Z's to her (Z is my 3 year old daughter, for those who dont know) after the lady scanned in through the till and I was gonna pay. Well, after I paid for it i went to take it back from her to unwrap it and she was already eating the fkn thing. FOIL WRAPPER AND ALL. omg. Oh, the horror. I tried to fish it out her mouth...but she had swallowed it. It was quite a big bite too. Lawdhavemercy.
 
Clin!!! Hooray! The gangs all here!! <3

Haha. Curvie...this is my life. You couldnt write this crap. Seriously. But I wouldnt trade any of it.

Oh. Apparently M (my husband) went in and found Roly (one of our 2 new-ish kittens...got them in feb - theyre 5months old) drinking water out of their bowl by USING HIS HAND. Like, scooping up the water and drinking it off his paw.... WTF. He is either special needs (in which case I need to pay more attention to him and make sure he is getting his needs met!) or THE MOST INSANELY CLEVER GENIUS CAT EVER. I have yet to witness this...but M said he thought maybe something was wrong with the bowl and/or water so he cleaned it out and put fresh water in and put it back down....nope. Did it again. Weirdo. lol. He also has a permanent concerned face. Like. He always looks concerned and/or disappointed. Actually, that would make sense. If he IS a genius then he probably is disappointed at how daft we all are. haha. he probably despairs at us mere humans. rofl!

So back to "topic":

Food today was spot on.

910/61

yay. I even got quite a bit of water....approx 2L which is more than ive had in ages. But I find that in the first few days when i start back on the water, my lips get really chapped. :(
 
beelishy said:
Clin!!! Hooray! The gangs all here!! <3

Haha. Curvie...this is my life. You couldnt write this crap. Seriously. But I wouldnt trade any of it.

Oh. Apparently M (my husband) went in and found Roly (one of our 2 new-ish kittens...got them in feb - theyre 5months old) drinking water out of their bowl by USING HIS HAND. Like, scooping up the water and drinking it off his paw.... WTF. He is either special needs (in which case I need to pay more attention to him and make sure he is getting his needs met!) or THE MOST INSANELY CLEVER GENIUS CAT EVER. I have yet to witness this...but M said he thought maybe something was wrong with the bowl and/or water so he cleaned it out and put fresh water in and put it back down....nope. Did it again. Weirdo. lol. He also has a permanent concerned face. Like. He always looks concerned and/or disappointed. Actually, that would make sense. If he IS a genius then he probably is disappointed at how daft we all are. haha. he probably despairs at us mere humans. rofl!

So back to "topic":

Food today was spot on.

910/61

yay. I even got quite a bit of water....approx 2L which is more than ive had in ages. But I find that in the first few days when i start back on the water, my lips get really chapped. :(
Click to expand...

Bahahah that's brilliant :)
 
Aw Alice drinks from cups of milk or tea using her paw but only if she can't reach it with her face. Roly must be super brainy <3 you should put a little napkin round his neck and he can dab at his lips with it when he's done :D

Awww ^~^ meow!
 
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