please someone help me!

hi, this is not my first attempt at LT 100% its proabably my 11th time and the longest i've lasted is two weeks, i get GREAT weight loss results in the first week 14lbs plus losses!i get lots of energy after the first four days and i desperately want to lose weight and fit back into my clothes and start going back out again! when i first started LT nearly four years ago i was my heaviest at 15stone but now i'm 19stone
i'm so unfit i cant walk far or up the stairs, i am starting to get these horrible lumps on the inside of my thighs that are hurting so badly and its all down to my size! i'm only 5'4ft and 27


the problem is i ALWAYS sabatoage myself even though i know i shouldnt and even while i'm doing it i'm crying cause i know its not what i want.

last night i went to bed with a self help cd on repeat to help with starting LT today, i stayed in bed till nearly 3pm so i wouldnt have to think about food, my partner locked all the doors to the kitchen and yet i rang him and texted him abuse about where the key is, i used the back of a spoon to unscrew the handles and still couldnt get in, i tried banging into the door to break it, then i rememmbered some Christmas presents were upstairs that could be eaten so i ate them and den i nearly vomitted and once i recovered i scrabbled to find money to order a take away, it was GROSS so i threw it into the fire so i couldnt eat it, and guess what while it was burnning away i nearly put my hand into the fire to scoop soe of the food out!!!!!!!

i'm sick arent i??? you all think i should be locked away in a padded cell?????????????????

i'm not a happy fat person, i'm so confident and outgoing when i'm slim and yet i wont let myself diet.
i've spent thousands on fancy gyms and other diets but stop after two weeks three at most!

i've had LOADS of support on this site before so i feel ashamed and guilty for asking for help on this site again?

i am in counselling so please dont suggest counselling.

has anyone been like me and finally lost the weight???

i really dont know what esle to do

thanks for reading!!!xxx

Hi Cherrygem, if you have done two weeks before then you know you can do two weeks again. you seem to be beating yourself up alot, why not give your self a break stop slagging yourself off, I dont know if this will help but maybe you could try re-reading your own post as if it were your best friend who had written it and think of what advice you would give her? We all seem to be able to be a good friend to someone else and say all the right things but not to our self. You are still YOU wether you are smaller or larger its still you with all the same qualities and skills. Good luck honey

what a beautiful thing to say!!!

Cherrygem, I have just read a post of yours to someone on another thread. You were so supportive and encouraging towards her, you told her you were sure that this time she would be amazing. I think you should tell yourself the same xx

you are a very clever lady! i know its silly i can be so supportive to other people, even people that have hurt me so badly but yet i find it imposssible to be nice to myself. i think deep down i'm afraid of getting hurt while i'm slim again, i seem to find trouble when i'm slim and then i balloon back up due to comfort eating and then i'm back to square one!

cherrygem said:

you are a very clever lady! i know its silly i can be so supportive to other people, even people that have hurt me so badly but yet i find it imposssible to be nice to myself. i think deep down i'm afraid of getting hurt while i'm slim again, i seem to find trouble when i'm slim and then i balloon back up due to comfort eating and then i'm back to square one!

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I can totally relate to your post Cherrygem I can feel more vulnerable when Im slim. Its strange that we are kinder to others than to ourselves, we need to be our own bestfriend first.

you are a breath of fresh air!

Hi Cherry. There are a lot of new starters at the moment so now could be a great time to try again. Post on here everyday, don't hide away if you've eaten something or feel down just keep posting and we will support you all we can. It doesn't matter if you've managed 2 weeks and then had a blip, or even one day and had a blip whats important is that you carry on again the next day so all is not lost. Start over but KEEP, KEEP POSTING. Best wishes.

thanks so much, i get so ashamed and i feel i let the side down when everyone is doing so so well!but i will try, thanks xxx

cherrygem said:

thanks so much, i get so ashamed and i feel i let the side down when everyone is doing so so well!but i will try, thanks xxx

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You have nothing to feel ashamed about. We all have issues involving food or we wouldn't be here. We all have tough days, days when we just can't cope, I have shed many tears on this diet! You haven't let anyone down least of all yourself but if you want to try again on LT then come back. You sound so down about your weight and I know all that could change following a few weeks on LT. So don't give up - come back!

the ladies on here are a real ray of sunshine!!!

Hy cherry gem please don't feel ashamed I'm re starting tomorrow I was meant to start on the first but I'm 9 days late iv been on this diet so many times I lost count I'm the same as you 2 weeks tops and iv given into temptation my boyfriend used to say he ain't gettin me takeaway coz I weren't mention to eat so I started lying telling him I'm on recede when I knew fully well I was talking sxxx so ur not the only one it is really hard to motivated something that helps me is keeping motivated wen I'm running around I never think about food it's wen I'm home alone
I know what my problem and many others are I have an addiction to food and because its around us every day it's harder ull be fine and please don't put ur self down xxxxx

yeah its when i'm lonely or when i dont feel loved/important/respected i use food as medicine

I do exactly the same but I am really trying to think positive stay calm wen i feel like I'm going to explode and take one day at a time the thing before is I wanted to see results straight way I didn't wanna wait 9mnths but my boyfriend always says positive things he told me a 9months is gonna come so if that's how long it takes that's how long it takes

see thats what i cant understand, i cant understand why i cant see this diet as a gift, like if i tried to lose this much weight through diet and excerise it could take two years, but with this it just take months and yet i wont allow myself do it

I'm exactly the same I think it's the thought of it what goes through my mind is 8 months that's ages away but it's gonna come and if I don't do something now ill just be in the same position 9 months later
Iv made this like a project and I think that's gonna help this time
I bought myself a diary iv put my current weight measurements and a pic on the fron a really bad one
Then iv looked at people's loses and worked out roughly how long it's gonna take me
Every stone I lose I'm gonna treat myself to something I really want
I just wanna be happy again in my own body my oh can not even touch my stomach I dress for my size not for myself so I buy clothes I wouldn't normally
I just feel like enoughs enough in my situation I went from 8st to 10st after I had my daughter and now I'm 16st a size 20 my boyfriend still thinks I'm a 16 lol have u started yet

Hi
I am starting back tomorrow, i feel the same as you, im thinking omg the effort of spending 8 or 9 months of my life with no food whatsoever its gonna kill me!!

fact of the matter is...

if i keep going the path im going, i will be dead!! probably not that soon but ya catch my drift.

we are treating our bodies like S*** and telling ourselves that "ah ive loads of time to lose it!" or "ill start next month" bla bla bla that has been my downfall for years.

im 24, im the "girl with the beautiful face" ... is that all i will ever be???

Due to my weight, I have literally ruined my knees i have a lot of muscle damage due to falls, I have contributed to my mental health getting so much worse than it ever was, i am suffering with bi-polar and i have lost out on YEARS of my teenage and early adult life because i have been too ashamed to get dressed up and go out because i am FAT!!

This year i am determined to start having a social life, to have a longer life and also have a more fun sex life, because if ya'll are anything like me... even that gets embarrassing when ur fat!!

2013 will be a better year for all of us!


GOOD LUCK

Mwah!

have started back today and i.m going to do this, i deserve a life!thanks for being so supporting x

Hay cherry gem have started back as we'll today I'm so half way through day and only had water and a shake I'm having now iv kept myself busy the chemist I walk to is about a 15min walk I walked there instead of driving walked back cleaned the house and the times flown bye I feel really positive how u doing and everyone else

a few more hours and i'll have day one done BUZZING!!! my bf left the kitchen unlocked today so i actually went to bed for a few hours and den got up and cleaned out the fridge so that helped keep me busy! wish my bf would hurry up and come hoe cause its at this time i find dangerous!