Saying hi - Day 11
After stopping / starting and lurking on these boards I thought it was time I joined in properly. I have had so much inspiration and motivation from here.
I was a chubby child, or so my parents would always tell me. When I look back at pictures I just look normal so I guess that has been the root to a lot of my problems.:(
In my teens and early twenties I was slim for the only time in my life but probably due to the fact that I was also a smoker. After getting pregnant in my early thirties (gave up the fags!) the weight has piled on. I hate the way I look. I avoid looking in the mirror - in my head I am not as big as I am and when I see myself, full length size 18, it is so depressing - I don't recognise who I have become. I am now 41 and feel like this is my last chance to start living like me again.
I hate feeling like this. I avoid going out and anything where I have to dress up because I know I will look and feel terrible. I realised that my two boys have no photos of me with them as I have been so good at avoiding the camera.
I did Cambridge Diet about 5 years ago and lost over two stone in about 5 weeks. I sabotaged over one crisp! And the rest is history.
So here I am again, after countless stops and starts where I never managed to get beyond day 5. If I had stuck to the plan in January, I would have been at goal by now. How long can you go on starting tomorrow?
So, the day that my kids broke up for summer, I started. I will not be the fat mum for my kids. Today is day 11 for me and I am feeling strong. I have made a countdown to Christmas 2013 and every day I cross another day off. It stops me breaking the diet because I can see how far I have come already. I am not hungry but I still long for food. My house has never been tidier!
I WILL do it this time. I have a mini-goal of sticking until the start of term in September. A family wedding in September (I will wear a dress and feel ok) and then holiday in the US in October. I will be in this year's Christmas photos and I will start living again.
We are all strong and capable of so much. Thanks if you have managed to get this far! :)
I will try to start a diary because I think it will stop me cheating! I think my main problem is boredom. I like the packs but because I am a rubbish cook, I am not managing much variety. Good luck today everyone. Today will be a good day!
Hi well done on day 11 and the 12lb loss, wow that must have given you a boost.
I understand everything you said and feel exactly the same, you get very good at hiding, lots of pics of my hand in front of the camera. Hopefully that will all change though for all of us.
I am off to the US in November next year, Florida to be exact, my favourite place in the whole world. Where are you going in October?
Thanks - we are going to Boston - should be lovely in the autumn (my kids would much much rather go to Florida!).
The big initial losses on S&S do keep you motivated at the start but then when it all slows down as of course it does, you need to find other ways of keeping going. I felt a bit tired and fed up today - woke up too late and am behind on all the things I want to do. My thoughts immediately turned to food which is crazy - like I am cross and want to punish myself. Had some chicken so crisis averted!
Hope everything is going ok for you. Are you on S&S too?
When the losses slow down, maybe try thinking of short term goals. I'm constantly thinking 'in three weeks i'll be 10lbs lighter' (14lbs a month average works out about that) and that's a good motivator. I think if I was to be thinking about my goal weight it'd seem like a huge hurdle. I also have tons of mini goals. Like so many i'm likely to achieve one every other week - next week I should have lost 10%, then the week after 2 stone - things like that.
You're right - I have found today hard. I stepped on the scales this morning and was 0.2lb (yes a whole 0.2!) heavier than yesterday. I will ditch the scales until WI day on Wednesday.
It's a bit of a plod at times but really, if I give up now I'll be back to day one at some point.
At the weekend I sorted out my wardrobe. I have everything in sizes 10-18. Literally 90% of stuff doesn't fit 'yet'. I buy lovely stuff in the sales 'for when I'm thin' and some of it is years old with the tags still attached. How lovely to just go into your wardrobe and be able to wear anything you want. I've noticed that I have more cardigans than anything else - a cardi over my fat arms and to cover my tummy or bum.
I shall have a big cardi bonfire when I reach goal! :D
Still got my evening pack to go - I fancy a cottage pie tonight!
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