2 birthdays in the same week - advice on how to cope?

Hi everyone,

I've got two birthday meals out coming up in the same week (first week of February), and I'm only two weeks into my diet. I've had a browse of the booklets in my membership pack, and whilst they give general advice, like avoid 'fried' and go for 'grilled' or 'baked', I'm not sure how to go about making sure I don't go above my syn allowance (I'm guessing the answer is it's impossible to be sure). The back of my main book gives syn values for branded places like Nando's, Pizza Express, etc., but I suppose it could be a minefield if you eat out anywhere else.

I'm really worried about jeopardising my weight loss, as it's been a very difficult first week (as someone with mental health issues, who was a serial comfort eater), and I really don't want to undo any progress that I'm hoping to achieve in the next fortnight. It's my closest friend's and my partner's birthdays in question, so unfortunately, not going isn't really an option. My biggest concerns are how to cope where my friend is planning on going (likely to be an American diner-type place with a bowling alley; I've had a quick browse of the menu, which is entirely burgers, hot dogs and fries, or she may go to a Chinese restaurant) and the fact that it could end up being three meals out in a week, as my partner's parents are coming to visit for his birthday.

I know it's my fault for not waiting until after then to begin, but my self-esteem hit rock bottom after Christmas and I realised that if I didn't take action when I did, I most likely never would have.

Any advice that you kind people are able to offer me would be greatly appreciated .

Catherine x

Hi wendolene, this problem has happened to me this week, sunday was my dads birthday.

I ate free foods mostly, and saved my syns for sunday. To try and lighten the impact. This doesnt always work for everyone, but i rest easy knowing i tried hard to compensate for anything i'd eat at the meal.
In addition; thinking of SW as a diet is the wrong way of looking at it, its a lifestyle choice. Don't beat yourself up over added syns because theres always the next week. Its a cycle which, if every once in a while you get the invite to a restaurant you can always say yes . I look at the menu before i go to see what might be the most SW friendly. Steak, jacket potato & side salad is good, or gammon and jacket potato. Just make wise choices and syn for the oil its cooked in as best you can.

Just enjoy yourself.

Xx

If all there is available is burgers - ask the waiter/waitress if they can bring you just the burger without the bun and chips and with some salad instead.

Or if that's not possible, order a burger and deconstruct it when it arrives. Eat the meat, any salad garnish and leave the rest. You absolutely do not have to eat everything which arrives on your plate. Give what you don't want to someone else. And don't explain, it's not necessary. You are in control of what you eat.

If it turns out to be a Chinese restaurant, then have a look in this topic because there have been lots of threads about Chinese food.

And stop saying it is your fault? How can that possibly be true??

Hi!

This is my first post here but I was in exactly the same situation as you. I'm someone that goes out every weekend with friends and family to eat, to go see a film and just generally hang out. First thing is first: I agree with Anna - don't feel bad because you decided to make the choice to be healthier on your own terms. You should be congratulating yourself, knowing these events were coming, and still stuck to your guns.

I thought it'd be very hard making the right choices at all the places we go to eat out at but actually now it's like a second nature - and I don't feel guilty at all. We eat at diner places all the time and while they vary in what they serve, there should always be something that you can have. Do you happen to know the name of the place you may go to? It would be easier to advise if there's a menu we can take a peek at but at those places I tend to gravitate towards steak, rice and vegetables, or a jacket potato that I've substitued for chips. Ask for sauces on the side too so you decide how much you put on (sauces are where the Syns creep in)

For Chinese food though - don't worry at all. It's not as bad as it sounds and I usually fill up on plain rice (free), noodles (free if they're boiled or cooked in soy sauce rather than oil - don't be afraid to ask; this includes chow mein which is usually cooked in vegetable oil) and then depending on what you fancy - you can have a portion of Beef with mushrooms or BBQ spare ribs for 8½ Syns, chicken in oyster sauce for 6½ Syns, chicken and mushrooms for 9½ and chicken in black bean sauce for 7½ Syns. Beef in black bean sauce tends to be slightly less at I believe 7 Syns.

Good luck! Let us know what you go for in the end and just have a great time. Remember this is going to be your way of life going forward so you can't fear little nights out!

Thank you for your helpful replies, everyone. I've found out that we're going to Mizu, a Chinese/Japanese noodle bar. Here is the menu:

http://www.mizunoodlebar.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/mizu-ipswich-menu.pdf

I've planned that it's probably best to have boiled rice, rather than fried rice or noodles, as I can be as sure as is possible that it is free food, but any advice you are able to give on what to have with it would be greatly appreciated.

Also, you're right, Anna - it's not my fault, really. Wasn't having the best of weeks, as my friend was accusing me of only thinking about myself. I would have waited to start group, but a shopping trip in which I had to go in the changing rooms (which I never like doing, as I find the lighting always shows up my imperfections) to try on jeans in yet another dress size up had left my self-esteem very low (I was sitting in the car, crying afterwards). It's not like it affects anyone else, anyhow, and I can still have a good time at the meal, I'm sure - I just need to know how to do this without taking a step backwards. It's been a real fight to get this first half stone off, as I'm on medication for anxiety disorder, that slows your metabolism and causes weight gain.

Anyway, I'm digressing. I'm just grateful to anybody for whatever advice you may be able to offer. The meal's on Friday, so I have a bit of time left to plan.

Also, welcome to the forums, Storm !

Catherine x

Wendolene said:

. . . my friend was accusing me of only thinking about myself . . .

Click to expand...

Wow - some friend! Not very supportive, is she?

It's a huge menu, so a really good idea to get a look at it before you go as it is always so difficult to make decisions in a hurry. And you are planning ahead, which is really good.

I think the best thing to do is to ignore anything that says "crispy" or "deep-fried". Obviously anything which is stir-fried will have some oil involved, but probably not too much. For instance, Item 80, the Mizu special rice, sounds really nice and I don't think oyster sauce has many syns. The Roast Pork Rice and Roast Duck Rice sound nice too - you should probably leave the duck skin to one side (although I am not sure I could be that good, to be honest!). The sweet soy sauce may have some syns, but probably not many.

If you plan the rest of your week carefully, maybe save up some syns, you should be fine. Have fun, don't get stressed and remember to enjoy yourself!