Thread: unsupportive family

Thought i'd post this just for comfort really, just so i know i'm not alone.
My family are not supportive of me and Slimming World, every time i mention it i just get a 'oh' or 'ok' usually. They know how i feel about my weight and why i'm doing it but still, not even an punce of support. The funny thing is they'd be the first people to be on my back about putting weight on. I'd just like a well done every now and then, y'know?

Have you perhaps had earlier slimming attempts and they're under the impression that this is just the next 'fad'?

If not, why not ask them why they're not being supportive - especially if as you say, they'd be the first to mention that you'd put on some weight.

If all else fails, just remember that you can't choose your family but you can your friends. I'm sure other mims on here will give you all the support you need.

Good luck

Originally Posted by Minimunchkins

Have you perhaps had earlier slimming attempts and they're under the impression that this is just the next 'fad'?

If not, why not ask them why they're not being supportive - especially if as you say, they'd be the first to mention that you'd put on some weight.

If all else fails, just remember that you can't choose your family but you can your friends. I'm sure other mims on here will give you all the support you need.

Good luck

this is my second attempt but they were like that all the way through my first attempt as well, I think they just think that support means just listening which isnt always enough.
Thank god for this forum! x

Good luck you can do it, do it for yourself.

What family are they? Parents, siblings or partner/kids?
Its horrible when people don't get support and encouragement but you need to do it for you and you will get the rewards x

I don't get a lot of support either. My parents are all "one won't hurt" and leaving cakes and biscuits and things out and about. I wish they'd put the biscuit tin back in the cupboard! Thing is, my mother actually does SW too, and decides if she is having a "bad" day then she will try and pull anyone else down with her. Not easy...

My other half (who I don't live with) eats whatever he likes (skinny begger!) and while he doesn't offer me sweets and cakes and puddings often (which is a good thing), it's sometimes quite hard to sit there with a glass of water while he's having an apple pie!

My work colleagues don't even ask if people want a portion, when they bring cakes & stuff in, they just dump it on your desk. Which is "nice" but they get so offended if you say "No thank you" or if you offer it out to someone else.

Like someone said above, best way is to come on here for your well dones. We can see how well you're doing, keep it up! And remember you're doing this for yourself, and sod em x

My family aren't unsupportive as such, they just don't follow the plan and don't 'get it'. They do however understand that getting to goal means a lot to me (even if they think I should stop now..yawn). Maybe you could sit them down, or just whoever you are closest to and explain to them that you're serious about it, and how you feel about their lack of support. If you explain to just one it might not be so intimidating and that one person might understand how serious you are and can therefore help relay the information to the others.

I know it's hard going it alone but it is doable. Just make sure you keep popping on here for support Good luck, you can do it!

WELL DONE FELLOW MINI'S !!!!!!

I am so lucky that Paul gives me 100% support and is thrilled for me as the weight goes off but I can sympathise and understand how demoralising it must be to give it your all and not get that all important pat on the back or consideration around food and drink.

As has already been so wisely said, this is the place to be for encouragment, understanding and support.

hugs to everyone !!!

Thank you all, it's just dis-heartening that the perople closest can't even shed an ounce of positivity or help. I honestly don't know where i'd be without this forum!!! X

This is how they were last time, this is how they are this time - they are not going to change. And you can't change them. You can't make someone else react the way you want them to.

So don't expect anything different - ever. You say "every time I mention it" - just stop mentioning it. Do what you want to do, for yourself and your own self-approval, not for approval from other people.

And Auburn - those work colleagues - just say thanks but you aren't hungry right now but you will wrap it up and take it home with you. They needn't know it will go into the first rubbish bin you pass on your way home!

Originally Posted by AnnaFaraday

This is how they were last time, this is how they are this time - they are not going to change. And you can't change them. You can't make someone else react the way you want them to.

So don't expect anything different - ever. You say "every time I mention it" - just stop mentioning it. Do what you want to do, for yourself and your own self-approval, not for approval from other people.

And Auburn - those work colleagues - just say thanks but you aren't hungry right now but you will wrap it up and take it home with you. They needn't know it will go into the first rubbish bin you pass on your way home!

I guess I just want to hear that they're proud of me, I lost a stone and a half on my first attempt and they didn't even say well done ONCE. I mean it doesn't cost anything.... Maybe one day i'll hear it!
My dad has had numerous tries with numerous diets before and has failed at all of them, I think he just expects everyone else to give up every time like he does so he doesn't bother with praise.

x

Maybe they feel like your success and determination is showing them up. If you manage to lose your weight with SW if kind of takes some of their own excuses away doesn't it. Not everyone can cope with things (or people) changing - even when it's a positive change.

You just keep going. You know it works and that you did it before (without their support) and can do it again. x

Originally Posted by Lucky7

Maybe they feel like your success and determination is showing them up. If you manage to lose your weight with SW if kind of takes some of their own excuses away doesn't it. Not everyone can cope with things (or people) changing - even when it's a positive change.

You just keep going. You know it works and that you did it before (without their support) and can do it again. x

So right Lucky.

Some people need love and encouragement and that vital pat on the back. I too am one of those people. Others can get on with it on their own and need nothing more than their own will power and determination, never needing confirmation of what they are doing.
It is quite nice if those around us understand and respect which one we are.

Originally Posted by fillymum

So right Lucky.

Some people need love and encouragement and that vital pat on the back. I too am one of those people. Others can get on with it on their own and need nothing more than their own will power and determination, never needing confirmation of what they are doing.
It is quite nice if those around us understand and respect which one we are.

Yep - that's why it's lucky that we get to choose our friends and partners. That way when our family (who we can't choose) are unable / unwilling to give us what we need, we can choose people to surround ourselves with who can and will understand and respect our needs. You chose your man well Filly. I hope Linz can find some support outside the family fold in real person form as well, otherwise we'll all still be here to rally round - that's what makes this forum so great. Instant support and understanding.

Thank u all.
Thankfully my boyfriend is an absolute gem and is very supportive, but he isn't here 24/7 as we don't live together. I think it upsets me because I am always the first person to give advice or say well done but i get nothing back... i guess some people were just brought up that way.
Hopefully i'll get a 'well done' when i get to target!

x