Nerves before my first weigh in
Well, I bit the bullet last Thursday and went to the local SW meeting. I am a repeat offender, but haven't been with a club for several years.
I got weighed on the Thursday, but had no intention of starting the diet until day one back at work - Monday 6th.
Fri - Sunday was taken with systematically getting rid of all the crimbo goodies (unfortunately by eating them) and planning menus and shopping lists for the big Monday.
Monday came, and I set of to work with a selection of plastic boxes in my bag, home made veg soup, yogurt and fruit and veg crudities.
The last 3 and a half days has been fab! - I have never tried the Extra Easy version of SW before. It is taking some getting used to mixing my meat and potatoes/rice etc. I have eaten loads......... That is where my worries lie, I feel like I have been eating far too much.
For the first time in years I can hand on heart say I haven't cheated and followed it to the letter. Even logging things like a teaspoon of salad cream etc. I have been within my syns each day and have resisted soooo much temptations.
I have cooked SW approved Veg Soups, Chilli, Curries and casseroles - with no extras!
I have been on the scales this afternoon which I know I shouldn't and have put weight on since last Thursday night.
Now............. I know I shouldn't be that surprised, I did eat like a pig on Fri/Sat & Sunday before I started, I do also know about not weighing at home and how the scales may be different etc, but this silly act has really upset me and now got me all anxious for the weigh in in an hours time.
If I have not lost or put on, I will be gutted, I know myself well and know that I will be so tempted to 'fall off the wagon'. results are the only thing that motivate me. I just need to be strong this week and get through it I guess. I have whole chicken with veg in the slow cook for when I get back, my theory is that I will stuff my face with that and not leave myself too much room to sin. I also think I need something nice but not naughty waiting for tonight when my hubby does his unintentional look of 'what again' - he doesn't have a weight problem and just doesn't get it.
Of course the logical side of me says - 'belt up, you haven't even been weighed yet'. - but we don't always listen to that part of us do we?
I will be now changing into my lightest clothes and going for a wee right before I join the queue.
I pledged years ago that I would never join a slimming club again as all those feelings I have just tried to express above come and take over me. I said I would do it alone and just eat healthy and never diet again..........where has that got me?? a size 24 again, that's where.
So I will pull myself together and see how I get on. I hope someone may read this and understand some of what I am feeling, If anyone out there is on a similar journey and they would like some company, let me know.
I will let you know how I get on in a couple of hours..............