- Rep Power
Very often on the forums I see someone respond to someone who has had a blow out with something like the following...
"Ah, never mind, just flexisyn it and move on".
Now, I understand that this is supposed to make the person feel better about their binge and draw a line under it, but simply, this is NOT how Flexisynning is supposed to be used.
Flexisyns are supposed to be a way of keeping you in control of your consumption at special occasions.
They are NOT designed to be an used as an excuse to write off a bad day. If you are going to flexisyn, this needs to be planned in advance of the event or occasion and you should set yourself a maximum number of syns for that day that you will not exceed. If you get to that amount of syns, you are then supposed to switch back to free and superfree for the rest of the day.
Using flexisyns as an afterthought completely defeats the object of putting YOU in control of the plan.
It is perfectly ok to say "Ah, you had a blow out, it happens to all of us, draw a line under it and move on." It DOES happen to all of us. We do lose control from time to time, whether that be because we drank too much and thought "Ah, stuff it, tomorrow is another day, I'll order that pizza, and being as I'm out of control, may as well have the tub of ice-cream too" or because we have talked ourselves into it, convincing ourselves that it really wont matter as a one-off. Perhaps we are feeling really down and only chocolate will do, by the cupboardload.
But by default, when we head down that road, we are out of control, we lose the ability to say no to the stuff we know is not on plan.
Most importantly, there is no shame in doing so. If we feel guilty about this one-off blow out, we are far more likely to eat more rubbish through guilt and "Well, I have blown it now, I am such a loser, may as well reinforce that message by continuing to eat nonsense". This is where I suspect most of us following the plan can really lose heart and fall off plan for weeks or months.
It doesnt have to be that way, of course, we can have a blow out, a day off plan, and still have the control to get back on plan right next day. And that means, ultimately, that while we did stop off at a scenic point on route, we are still in control and heading towards our destination despite the stop.
So please, STOP suggesting that people flexisyn a blow out. They are two entirely different things and people need to start taking responsibility for their own consumption, rather than just passing it off because it doesnt matter. Of course it matters, but by passing the responsibility for the lack of self-control onto a "flexisyn" day defeats the purpose of a flexisyn day, which IS designed to keep you in control.
Be honest, if you had a blow out, say so. If someone you know had a blow out, acknowledge it, encourage them to move past it, but dont encourage them to write it off using a part of the plan that it simply doesnt apply to.
/gets off soapbox.
Excellent post, and something I think about everytime I see the "nevermind" flexi syn it, but could never type it as well as you have!
My old consultant explained to me once that Flexi-syns were introduced to enable people to feel like they remained in control after the event and didn't feel that they had 'blown it'. If it were a part of the diet, in the eating sense, there would be guidelines as to how many syns you can have.
It's a psychological tool, rather than actually part of the diet, that simply helps people to feel that they haven't blown their diet, and so they carry on as normal. If someone doesn't have a planned day off, but has a day off the plan nonetheless, beating themselves up about it because it wasn't planned isn't going to achieve anything other than guilt. If they can forget about having a 'blow out' without feeling guilty, then they're much more likely to return to the diet with minimal impact.
This is as it was explained to me by a consultant when Flexi-syns were first introduced.
- Rep Power
Perhaps that was the case when they were first introduced, but it is not how the literature defines it now, and not how it is intended to be used now.
I agree that we shouldnt feel guilty if we slip out of plan for a night, or a day or a couple of days or whatever. The whole ethos of the plan is that life will occasionally get in the way of the plan but that we can enjoy "life" without having to feel guilty. But the sort of blow out we are talking about is generally fuelled by either being drunk, or unhappy, and so if we are feeling that way anyway, the morning after is a prime time for feeling remorse and guilt about what we did the night before.
Drawing a line under an offplan spell is important, but it is not within the current guidelines to refer to this as flexisynning, because of the lack of control involved.
This whole cycle of "overindulgence = guilt" needs to be broken. Because we overindulge, we feel guilty, this makes us feel bad about ourselves, we overindulge more. That doesnt help at all. We need to overindulge, acknowledge the overindulgence, celebrate the fact that we enjoyed the splurge, and move on with the plan.
Often, an occasional overindulge can actually benefit weightloss, both because we splurge on the things we enjoy and dont feel like we are depriving ourselves, and can stick to the plan better, but also because it can give a sluggish metabolism a bit of a boost and a kick start. If we start to view these events in a more positive light, but remember to keep them as a rare event rather than a weekly excuse to make ourselves feel bad, then we can stick to the plan well and will succeed in our goals.
And by doing so, we are still, actually, staying in control. Which rocks.
Thanks for that MLM
You have summed up what I've thought but been confused over sometimes.
I tend to just have blow outs - I don't set myself a set number of syns if I'm having an off day - I just keep eating!
Now I'm going to draw a line under it and get on with doing the plan - WI tomorrow so it's another week
Just want to say thanks for posting this though.
Can someone explain flexi syns? x
MadamLAMinx has explained it really well in the first post. It is when you have a special event, a one off, and to keep yourself in check you allow yourself extra syns for that day only and STICK to that limit. It allows you to keep in control and feel like this event hasn't led to you "ruining it". It is not the same as a binge, it is a planned and controlled response. Just as MLM said.
Don't mean to be a party pooper.......I fully agree what you are...but there are times when 'planning' doesn't come into it.....and sometimes people go off track.....and need to draw the line.......this diet is a journey.....and as long as you know you can get back on track....then so be it......don't beat yourself up.....the tortoise won the race
Oops sorry, it skipped three (in my phone) and thank you both!
Originally Posted by Shrimpy
I didn't know why flexisyns were,,, but had heard it on here in a 'don't worry - use flexi syns' way x
- Rep Power
Yes, Dawn, there are times like that, but that's precisely the point of my post in the first place. It is not flexisynning to go off track. Going off track is going off track. Nothing to feel bad or guilty about but the ability to draw a line and take back the control over yourself cannot be achieved if one simply writes it off as a "flexisyn day". That's only decieving yourself.
Originally Posted by NewDawn
Can't rep you again, yet!!!
Once again, thanks to MLM for yet another well thought out, well worded inspirational thread!!!
This post should be made a sticky, it explains exactly what Flexi-Syns are and it is explained in a very easy to understand way.
Well done on a brilliant post MLM
haha i also am not allowed to rep you!
what a fantastic post!!! agree that this should be made a sticky as its the most 'mis used' thing on sw.
hurrah for you for getting on that soapbox!
Absolutely, there is a marked difference between going off plan completely and flexi-synning, well done to MLM for reminding everyone of the difference! Great post xxxxx
There are quite a few of us who try to dispell the idea that you can flexi-syns and unplanned blow out, but the myth still runs around on here.
I also remember when flexi-syns were first introduced and they were always explained as a tool for special occasions by my Consultant, so I guess that, at the time, the idea was being misunderstood or misused all over the place!
Call a binge a binge and you're less likely to do it again, call it a flexi day and you might think it's condoned by SW.
I remember a post a little while back, I think it may have been by CocktailPrincess which said
1. Using syns weekly = adding up all your syns at the beginning of te week and deducting when you use them.
2. Flexi-synning = when you have a special occasion allowing yourself a set number of syns so that you have some control. You still have your daily syns for the rest of the week. You might not lose weight on a week when you have a flexi-syn day.
3.A binge = Eating everything in site with no control, unplanned
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