losing weight but don't feel great.... please help

Hi Everyone,

Been losing weight which is great and nearly at target but still feel fat at times (most of the time) and have no confidence at all!!!!

People say you are looking great and also I have bought some really nice clothes but I still struggle in my head!

I stay to group every week. I am the only man usually in image therapy. I love getting involved and sharing ideas. I love to cook.

Has anyone else had this problem or having this problem?

Any ideas on how to get over it would be brilliant as my consultant has tried to help me but i really am struggling :sigh:

Many thanks

Si

I'm the same! I've lost nearly 5st and everyone is telling me how slim I look and I just can't see it. I still feel as fat as I was!

The only thing that helps me to see is photos, when someone's took a picture of me and I can see how thin my face is and how much I've lost, if you've got any before pictures, then get someone to take a pic of you now and you will soon see the difference!

Ive heard that it takes our minds 6months to catch up with our weight loss, so our minds are probably still getting uses to it

I think this is quite a common thing with people who've lost weight - especially a lot of weight. You have this idea of how wonderful you'll feel when you're at target, and when you don't feel that way, you wonder what's gone wrong. When I've lost weight previously (I hold my hands up as a yo yo dieter) I remember still feeling 'fat' in my head even when I had a slim body and so the weight crept on again...

For me, personally (and this may not apply to you) it was a question of self esteem primarily. I couldn't accept losing weight as an achievement and I didn't really think I 'deserved' to be thin. I felt like I was faking being at a healthy weight because *really* (i.e., in my head) I was still overweight. I don't know if this makes any sense to you at all?!

This time around, I'm really working on my self esteem. I'm giving myself credit for making healty food choices and getting fitter and acknowledging that yes, losing weight is hard but I'm doing it and that's something to be proud of.

Hoping that helps you a bit!

Firstly thanks to you both for your response.

I have done the photos Rochelle. I'll combine them for my avatar over the weekend. My big photo is pride of place on the fridge as a reminder not to open the fridge.

alwayssunshine I completely know where you are coming from.... Its not just me then lol

I am in unknown territory this time. Gone past the previous 6 lost and worried when i hit target I wont be happy :(

I have also given up the cigarettes 20 days ago which i am proud of just wish I could combine both.

I am in good shape (toning nicely with training) yet I went on holiday in august aboard and took me all my time to take my top off beside the pool crazy!

im very near my goal but still feeling like im not quite there its hard but the thing that bothered me then (being overweight) is now loose skin instead you cant blooming win trying to tone but i just think its gonna take time

one thing i am doing when i get to goal is having a photoshoot with my friend (who i love and trust so much)and she is an amazing photographer i have decided to have a nude shoot to celebrate how far ive come and to help me love my body. she took my bump photos when i was preggers and made me feel fab and captured my best bits so thought id bite the bullet and go for it eek

Cat that sounds like an amazing idea! My friend did something for her wedding for her husband. An album for him to view lol.

I would love to try that but your right you must b able to trust the photographer x

First thing - you've done so well and a mega well done for 20 days cig free! I gave up for good May last year and it was tough but by doing SW at the same time I controlled it pretty well and only had a tiny gain which I lost quickly.

It's true - no one can prepare you for how you feel when you've lost a significant amount of weight. I waver between being proud of myself and miserable, feeling like I've achieved a lot and achieved nothing at all. People tell me that I've done so well and I can't see it because I still have another couple of stone to lose. I lose sight of what I have achieved so far.

The photos do help - I made a before and after pic and it really helped me to see the difference. It's harder for us to see it in ourselves because we look in the mirror every day and see the same person. It's when you see people you've not seen for a long time and they don't recognise you that you start to realise just how different you look.

Whatever you do - don't forget to tell yourself well done. Buy new clothes that fit you well - that's helping me a lot. In my old baggy clothes I felt no different to the old me but I feel very different in my size 18 skinnies! I felt very odd about clothes shopping though, kept automatically picking up bigger sizes. I think Rochelle is right though about waiting for your brain to catch up - mine's not quite there yet either! ;) We're doing life changing stuff here, it's gonna take a while to get our heads around it!

Well done for quitting the cigs, I've been stopped for 14 months now! Can't say it affected my weight as I lose my apetite a bit and joined slimming world at the end of march last year. Your body will thank you for stopping trying to kill it with nicotine and also losing all that weight you've really done amazing, so be proud of yourself!!

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Originally Posted by cat yoyo greaves

im very near my goal but still feeling like im not quite there its hard but the thing that bothered me then (being overweight) is now loose skin instead you cant blooming win trying to tone but i just think its gonna take time

one thing i am doing when i get to goal is having a photoshoot with my friend (who i love and trust so much)and she is an amazing photographer i have decided to have a nude shoot to celebrate how far ive come and to help me love my body. she took my bump photos when i was preggers and made me feel fab and captured my best bits so thought id bite the bullet and go for it eek

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Amazing idea Cat, that will be fab!

thanks missy. I have now put my avatar on. I have bought some lovely clothes but some days i feel soooooo bluuuuurrrrr.....

Then sometimes think no im doing ok lol cant win x