Nerys: My wish for you is that you get to your goal and stay there. Whether I agree with your way of thinking about it is neither here nor there, so I will 'try' to butt out of this thread. No promises mind you
If you need this forum for support from those who feel they can assist you in your goals, then I hope it helps, but your long term success will come from learning about what didn't work for us in the past and adapting. After all, as they say "If you want what you do not have, you must do what you have not done."


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