Thread: Please help me make a decision regarding my Wedding Dress.

I ordered my wedding dress at the end of August because I was advised that if I didnt I would be run the risk of there being a delay on the normal 8 months and then I wouldnt get time for alterations!! Or even worse I would run the risk of having to get married in my pyjamas because the dress hadnt arrived at all!!

The girls in the shop were very nice and asked me my size. I was fully aware of the fact that I was going to be about a size bigger, so I told them that I wear a 20 sometimes 22 but I would prob take bigger in a wedding dress.

I tried on dress after dress and then seen this gorgeous model type trying on a dress that I just fell in love with. It was in the same slimming kind of style that I had tryed on but it just Shone and I fell in Love with it so completely When I said the women thats my dress, she said 'we dont have it in your size to try on but it would be equally as slimming as what you have tryed on'. My mum was elated because she had noticed the dress too and thought it was lovely.

Anyways, after they measured me up (which was tres embarrassing because it was a skinny milink that was doing it) they told me I would be a size 26 . (I thought that I would go up one size but not 2 nearly 3)

I told them I was planning to lose weight and that I planned to have at least 4 stone off before the wedding. But the lady said that she wouldnt order it in a smaller size because if she did then that would be the shops fault for ordering a dress that I dont fit. I said that I would go elsewhere and order one as a random pedestrian off the street if she wouldnt order a smaller one. She said that she would order it one size smaller but that was her limit but that alterations to the dress would be no problem and you could alter it down sizes but that you couldnt alter it up. She made me promise that I would lose at least the 1.5stone that is would take for me to shrink a dress size. I said I was determined to lose even more than that.

So I ordered the dress in a size 24 with the thought that it could get it altered to whatever size I was closer to the wedding (as long as that size was smaller).

I was in the shop the other day with one of my bridesmaids who was trying on her dress and told her that I had almost one stone off on the cambridge diet and that the average weight loss is a stone a month so I would most probably be an (everyday wear) 14 by my wedding. She told me that I shouldnt overdo it because my dress cannot be altered any less than a 22 and I was so Mad!!! Especially after being told different. She said that she would double check and come back to me and went to see her boss. She came back to me and said that it could come down to a 20.

My problem is (and I had explained this to her when I bought my dress) that I usually lose most of my weight from the top half of my body first and this is the part the dress will be fitted to. I mean I have been known to have a 14 on top and a 18 at the bottom. But this kind of rounded off (if you excuse the pun) when I put on weight!!

What should I do? Settle for a goal that would leave me size 16/18 and therefore a 20 in the dress or just lose my deposit and order another one??? I dont have the money to order another but its so important that I look gorgeous on my wedding day.

HELP PLEASE!!!

Hi Claire

I'm sorry you are worrying about this but at the same time I'm sure the sooner you think this through the better.

Is the deposit you have paid very much?

Also if you get down to a really small size would it be easier to buy a dress you were happy with much closer to the wedding?

How much have you fallen in love with that particular dress?

Would you be happy to get an off the peg one if that was necessary?

I am asking all these ???'s because as I mentioned it too me 2 weeks to organise my wedding and I bought my dress in Monsoon a week before.

I'm sure their will be other brides along who can help you better.

Dizzy x

Hi Dizzy

Is the deposit you have paid very much? £300

Also if you get down to a really small size would it be easier to buy a dress you were happy with much closer to the wedding?
It would be easier but would cost loads and I would be ordering that exact dress because I love it

How much have you fallen in love with that particular dress?
Oh I just absolutely Adore it!!! Its perfect. Everything else I tried on was no comparison!!

Would you be happy to get an off the peg one if that was necessary?
If it was completely necessary but I would probably be really sad that I couldnt wear that one. I just love it!!

I just cant believe that the shop mislead me!! Its not fair because they werent even going to let me order the one size smaller because they said it could be altered down sizes (as many as I like) and now they are saying that it cant!!

why dont you demand to see the boss and tell him/her about the treatment you've had from the saleswoman. This is YOUR special day you shouldn't have to settle for seond best just because some stupid woman wont lsten to you.

I understand she probably hears it all the time that people want to lose weight before their wedding but you're the one paying for it she should have done as you asked.

If you cant get the dress size changed then try demanding your refund back because the shop is not giving you what you want. I don't know if it'll work but worth a try surely?

Don't settle or you will be miserable about it on the day.

It's a really difficult one! If the shop misled you though the sooner you speak up the better. I would of thought at this stage they would be able to change the order for you. You are obviously spending a lot of money in there store and they should do all they can to keep you a 'happy gal' especially in their business, making dreams come true and the happiest day of your life and all those other cliches.

It is not good for their business if you aren't happy so I would talk to them before it is too late!

Dizzy x

Hi Claire, I second wat Kati has said...go see the boss and explain wat happened with the sales girl and just dont back down!! Tell them you either want the money back or you want them to order a size for you, that can be altered as low as a 14 or 16. You are determined to do this diet, you will succeed and after surviving nearly your first week on this you soooooo have the power to get the muppets in the dress shop to do wat they are told - they dont do this for free, they get paid to provide this service, if they refuse to order the dress smaller simply take your money and go elsewhere

Hi Claire,

I am very much like you when it comes to size as I am bigger on top.

I was in a size 30/32 top and I was 17st.12lbs. nude weight.

Trousers with elastic waist were a size 24 and I had grown out of them...so I was in stretchy pants that were bursting so don't dare to think what they would of been if they were tailored.

Now I am 11st. 12lbs. and I am still in 18 tops which have room and stretch jean size 16 which are comfortable.

I am 5' 4" tall and very small frame...some shoes now size 3 1/2 fit me.

I don't understand the sizes of clothes anymore to tell the truth as I have size 16 jeans from the old days and they would not look at me yet.

Everyone seems to feel the same about clothes sizes they are all over the place...so how is anyone suppose to know what size they are. I am so confused about it.

I think curvy-chicken would have a good idea and I believe over on the retail therapy section I saw a member that has her own clothing company so perhaps they would be able to help as it is an awful dilemma.

I will have a look to see if I can find her name.

Love Mini xxx

Here is a link to the forum: http://www.minimins.com/retail-thera...ur-target.html (Best Plus Size Shops - Until You Get to Your Target!)


OMG........

Plus Size & Outsize Womens Fashion Clothing : Big Girls Wardrobe is my website, I'm glad you both like it!

I started it 2 years ago as I was fed up of not being able to find decent plus size clothing - I was not into wearing tents!

If you think the site is missing anything, let me know and I'll get on the case immediately!

Jem xx
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www.biggirlswardrobe.com
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Originally Posted by Mini

Here is a link to the forum: http://www.minimins.com/retail-thera...ur-target.html (Best Plus Size Shops - Until You Get to Your Target!)


OMG........

Plus Size & Outsize Womens Fashion Clothing : Big Girls Wardrobe is my website, I'm glad you both like it!

I started it 2 years ago as I was fed up of not being able to find decent plus size clothing - I was not into wearing tents!

If you think the site is missing anything, let me know and I'll get on the case immediately!

Jem xx
__________________






www.biggirlswardrobe.com
vbrep_register("26013")

Unfortunately I have no expereience of bridalwear . If I were you though, I'd speak to the manager at the shop and explain that you have been misled. If you were told that the dress could be altered to whatever size you'd like, I'd demand a full refund or ask them to change the order to a smaller size which could be altered to a size 14.

It may be worth seeing if you can find this dress in the size you are now in another shop so you can try it on - at least you'd be able to see if it actually fits or if indeed you do need to be ordering 3 sizes bigger (this seems a little extreme!).

Good luck!

Jem xx

Oh hunny how sad for you i really hope it gets sorted.
I had trouble with my bridal shop when i got married i was wearing a size 24 and my dress was ordered in a size 30 just so it would fit.
It was horrible for me and although i didnt lose weight the top had to have a few of the bones removed to make it fit my top half as i have nothing up top.

I would ask them to order a lower size.

Claire - can only reiterate what everyone else has said ... and go back to the shop, ask to see the manager/ess and tell them of your dilema. If no joy there - ask for details of their head office/boss and keep taking it higher until you get what YOU want.

The only other suggestion is - do you know anyone who could make something similar to the dress of your dreams??? My ex M-I-L made my wedding dress and so I had none of these problems you are encountering.

As others have said - it's your day, you are paying (and it ain't cheap!!) and they should be trying to please you.

Good luck!

I am almost positive they could change the size for you. Although I can see why they didn't to be honest - I ordered my dress too small and I was on a diet, and breaking it constantly for the very stressful lead up to my wedding - it was a total nightmare, and I only just fitted the dress on the day.

But all it is now, is a matter of changing the order. They can't honestly say that it takes that long to MAKE the dress - order it, fair enough, but not to MAKE it.

A good forum to ask on in hitched.co.uk - lots of weddingy advice!

Good luck.

Oh, wedding dresses are such a pain!

I have read on lots of websites that on the whole, the dresses can only be taken in about one size (2 at the extreme) because of beading, boning, whatever else there may be.

If you've ordered it in August, chances are the manufacturers haven't started making it yet. I would go back to the shop, and ask if there is any chance of re-ordering in a smaller size. I can understand why shops only want to order in the size we are now, they don't want the responsibility of us not fitting in them.

If the shop is reluctant, find out if they have a head office, owner, and contact them. If you still don't have any joy, in all honesty, I'd cancel and start again.
It's awful having to lose the deposit, but personally, I'd pay the price for having a dress that fits. I'd feel miserable if my dress was hanging off or ill-fitting on the day, and there's the photos as a constant reminder.

I'm in the same boat, as I've said before, so am leaving it til the last possible moment before I even start looking for my dress.

OK...so I've never had a wedding dress, but I have had a bridesmaids dress. I went to the shop wearing size 16.......they tell me they have to order it in a 20 (sheesh!!) for me. So fine.....got it ordered. Lost 4 stone and needed it taken in 8 inches pretty much all over.....and they did it. Didn't look perfect, the bones etc were a little bit out of place and stuff but at least they did it!

I think your wedding dress should be perfect so you should put your foot down and get what you want!!! You can get things massively taken in, but it won't look perfect. Best to get it so that they only have to take it in a bit for you!

Put your foot down girl!!! YOU are the CUSTOMER and they do not dictate to YOU! Don't let them make you feel small.

One of my clients had the same problem. She'd ordered the dress in whatever size, then lost 3 stone and the shop told her the dress couldn't be altered anymore.
She was gutted as she really didn't want to lose the dress money (over a thousand pounds) or stop the diet. So she went onto CD1000 for a few weeks and the dress was still way too big on top, apparently but looked ok.

She would have been so much happier staying on SS and getting a dress that was smaller, she told me and to be honest, she's having trouble getting back on to SS to complete her weightloss to her target weight.

So, if it was me, I would ask for a refund and reorder the dress in a different size. Or as others have said, try to find the dress in a different shop. You do want to be a princess on your special day, so the dress has to be perfect and a perfect fit!