Thread: Conventional woman i am not,but i will find a weight loss plan that suits my needs !!

As i sit here today i decided to start my own weight loss diary in the hope it will help me on the long journey i have ahead of me.
My journey started properly on the 3rd August 2006 when i joined slimming world and i weighed in at 27.9.
I have been overweight all my life but from the age of 8 i started gaining weight in very large ammounts,i beleive i started emotional eating on a large scale at that age.
At the age of 8 i lost my beautiful mum to breast cancer after she had been ill for 3 yrs.
My grandparents addopted me and my brother,my grandfather was a perfectionist and my weight was a big issue with him and so it carried on for all of my life.
Due to lots of reasons i have carried on getting bigger and bigger although i have been sucessfull on a couple of times losing weight i have still regained my weight.
My weight issues have controlled my life becuase i have allowed them to and now when i look back on my life i wish i had taken control much earlier,but the way i am looking at it now is "whats done is done and i cant change the past,but what i can do is change my future for the better".

I have had many health problems probably due to my obesity and i have tried on a few occasions to ss but never sucseeded and only once i got to day 17.
About a month ago i tried to restart cd again and got to the end of day 2 and ended up in casualty after passing out and my blood sugar level had dropped very low,my gp the next day told me he thought i was diabetic and sent me for various tests,last week the results come back and he said i am a very lucky woman as i am not diabetic but am border line diabetic and i need to keep a very close eye on my low blood sugar levels,but i seriously need to lose this weight ASAP b4 something very serious happens to me.
So i joined Slimming World 3 weeks ago and have stuck to it.
This morning i went to an earlier class as i usually get weighed in the evening and i got weighed this morning and i have lost another 3lbs this week which makes a total of 21.5lbs in 3 weeks,which i am very happy about.
Although my weight is coming off at a fast rate i know this will slow down soon.
I have decided to try CD one more time for the very last time,so as of tomorrow i am going to be SSing again.
This time i am ready to do the emotional work i need to do acknowledge the reasons why i emotionally eat and tackle any other problems i have,where as in the past i have shoved all my problems in a cupboard and locked them away and never acknowledged that they play a major part in my life and how my life has been put on hold due to the fact i have not dealt with this emotional baggage.
So for the first time i have decided to write down all my thoughts in the hope that this is going to help me in my journey and help me face my problems and fears so i can change my life once and for all.
I have a beautiful 14 yr old son Aaron who is my life and due to my weight problems and emotionall issues i have not been able to give him the life he deserves.
Aaron went to Kenya with his school for 2 weeks to do voluntary work and came home yesterday and these 2 weeks he has been away made me realise how much i love him and i want to be around for a long time and see his children grow up, and he deserves to have his mum around for many more years and that i have depended on him 2 much and how i need desperately to change my life.
I want to do all the things i should of done with him but could not becuase of my weight and emptional issues

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH I AM GOING TO TAKE COMPLETE CONTROL OF MY LIFE,I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THE NON EXISTANT LIFE I LEAD I DRAW A LINE UNDER MY OLD LIFE AS OF TODAY !!!

GO FOR IT !!!! You have it in you and you know you have.

M.

Good Luck Roch - I'm absolutely certain you can do it!!!


Tash xx

I hope so Mike i really do,it took alot for me to open up and write down these private thoughts today and i really hope that i have the strength,determination and courage to sucseed this time.

you go girl!
you know ill always be here for you....

Hi Roch

I have always read your thread on the discovery forum and felt for you so many times and know exactly what you are saying about the emotional stuff. But believe me the first time you say no to food when something emotional takes over is the hardest, after that, it can only get easier!!

you are an incredible woman to have raised your son, who by the way is a credit to ya, not many 14 year olds would spend part of their summer helping someone else so you have done a great job. also to have come on here and took the first steps to freedom from the misery of being overweight.

you have done brill on SW and i have every faith that you will do great on CD this time. I am on day one of a restart after my hols so will be keeping an eye out for you and willing ya along at every opportunity!!!

good luck girl ya know you can do it and when you are feeling **** just get on here and have a look at all the success stories, it CAN be done!!! imagine this time next year you could be at goal..........

ya know where i am if ya need any support or a kick up the bum

best of luck for tomorrow

love

gen xxx

Roch, just a quickie coz im at work, i am behind you 100% for your start tomorrow, if you need anything at all im here, and so are the rest of minimins,
much love to you at this time,
ill try post later when im at home x

Roch, I don't doubt you can do it at all! The 21.5lbs you've lost so far surely has boosted your confidence and made you see that if you put your mind to something you can achieve it. I will try my best to spur you on and I look forward to hearing about your journey

Roch, I am so pleased for you. Your mind souns so clear and your goals are achievable. Go for it, we are all with you.

Hugs

Thanks Tash86,just looking at your tracker u r practically at goal, u go girl !!

Keelie thanks hun i know u will support me,sorry to leave on slimming world but im sure there will be plenty of new recruits to SW as there are so many new people joining the forum,keep up the good work and as "Demon says" keep your eyes on the prize,keelie u r half way there xx

Thanks Gen,its so nice to hear compliments about the way i have raised Aaron,i have made plenty mistakes but one thing i can always put my hand on my heart and say that i have always put Aaron`s needs first as he is my life,and if i dont take my health seriously and my obesity causes me to die then how is my beautiful son going to cope without me,so every time i feel like i am going to give in whilst i ssing i am going to remind myself that i am hurting Aaron by eating as i am allowing myself to be one step closer to dying.
Gen u have done so well so far,i will just be one day behind u,hope day 1 is going good for u,keep up the good work and thanks for such a nice message xx

Thanks vicky,each time i look at peoples trackers so many of u have your goal weight just round the corner i am so looking forward to the time when i can be as proud as you are and so many others to practically reach your goal weight,keep up the good work xx

Thanks zareena,yes the 21.5 lbs i have lost has given me some more confidence and more than that has given me a bit more mobility i managed to walk roiund the airport yesterday without getting out of breath,so that was an achievement for me.
How are u doing girl,25 more pounds to go wow !!!

Barb,thanks i do feel more posiitve but the problem is i have been here in this same place b4 on many occasions and still failed,i just hope this time will be different for me,hope u r having a good day,chat soon xx

Hiya Roch

Thanks for your reply

yes girl i have done well and to be honest i'm really proud of myself but i have put in the hard work and it really was only the first few days of hard work and then i just had to say NO when i felt myself falling!!! i have had slips but i think the thing that has kept me going was that i just continued on and didn't always start back at day 1 cos i think that really messes with our minds and makes us think we have failed.

Altho i'm on day 1 of my restart today, i'm still on day 137 of my CD journey, and even tho its a restart and i haven't as much to lose as before, it still is a restart and as we all know day 1's are bloody tough i think no matter how much we have to lose!!

please don't dwell on other peoples successess or not as the case may be, just give urself small goals from now and as you reach them just be so proud of yourself. you have lost nearly 2 stone on SW in the past few weeks that is amazing and i really hope you are beaming with pride cos that is brill!!

my small goal now is to get to 11st something even if that something is 11st 13.99999999999999lb lol lol i can't remember the last time i was 11st anything so that will be a real bonus.

keep in touch girl cos i need all the encouragement i can get and you will receive bucket loads back!!

i wish you all the best for tomorrow and try to remember the first few days are the worst (that was really me telling myself that ha ha)

love

Gen xxx

Hi Roch,

You are already doing really well! 21.5lb in three weeks! Wow!

I have also started the CD journey a few times: First time round I lost 4 stone, then regained about a stone, and tried again, but didn't stick with it and now I'm back doing SS for the third time. I only need to lose another 11lb, but I know what food tastes like and everyday is a struggle. I fight with my own self every time I hear that little voice in my head, and every time so far I've won...

I've been reading your threads on DH and I think you are a wonderful person. You have my support, and I hope you will achieve what you set out to do.

I'm here cheering you on!!!!!!!! GO GIRL, YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!!

Keep us up to date with the ups and downs and we'll be here for you!!! xxx.

Thanks Chloe,so many people are saying they read my posts on dh and remember me,i never thought that i was such a memorable person LOL.
Well done for getting back on ssing,that 11 pound will just drop of you,keep glugging the water.
Chat soon and thanks xxx

Just a quickie to say thanks to all of u for all the kind messages of support it was hard for me to open up and put my feelings down for all to see but i now know it was the right decision,take care,sleep well xxxx

Hi Roch

Sticking to the diet and losing the weight is only half the battle, the other half is putting in the work to challenge what has been going on in your head to make you rely on food in the first place.

It sounds to me (and has done for a short while now) that you really are ready not only to ditch the weight, but also to ready to challenge those demons that have kept you captive for so.

Taclke the issues one by one as they come up and you are buying your freedom

I'm here for you as always, follow your dream