Fab by forty
Tomorrow will mark the start of my new journey to fabulousness by my 40th birthday (635 days) or 1 year and 9 months in old money.
I am currently the heaviest I have ever weighed, roughly five stone heavier than my BMI says I should be. I have been on a permanant on-a-diet-off-a-diet diet for the past 15 years.. I wish I was as "heavy" now as I thought I was 15 years ago. Since then I've tried calorie counting, weightwatchers, slimming world, 5:2 diet, celebrity slim and various meal replacement diets (all umpteen times). The only diets which have really worked for me are the milkshake diets but I fail to keep the weight off and it all goes straight back on plus more.
The main reason I want to lose weight is vanity; I just do not like the way I look. I barely have any clothes that fit me, I have got too fat for my work uniform but I still have to wear it, so that humiliates me every day as they wont buy me a new one because they are discussing changing the uniform. I sit there every day sweating in a heavy cardigan which I can't take off because my work blouse gapes so much and my trousers dig into me causing big, red grooves in my skin which are sore and itchy. I want to be able to sit down in comfort. I dread nights out because although I like to look nice, I don't feel that I can look nice at this weight - although I'm big and buxom and bumly all over, I carry LOTS of weight around my waist and stomach and you just cannot disguise a huge stomach. I look more pregnant than the woman at my work who is 7 months pregnant (she's only just got too fat for her work shirt this week!!!)
It is a cliche but I need a lifestyle change. My physical health seems to be okay. My blood pressure is fine, my asthma is under control, my last lot of blood tests were perfectly normal, surprisingly even the sugar levels (I thought I had an underactive thyroid). I am extremely unfit though and even the slightest bit of walking on the flat kills me. However my dad does have Type II diabetes since the age of 54, and I believe if it runs in the family you're more likely to get it so I probably have that to look forward to.
However my personality is that I never stick to anything and get bored easily hence my nickname of yo-yo-dieter. I don't drink, don't smoke, don't go out that much, don't really have any hobbies outside of the house, and I bloody adore ALL food which is a lethal combination. My job is quite boring and I am sat at a desk for 9 hours per day and there is always someone at work bringing food in.
So, I'll start tomorrow. I hope someone reads this, but if not, I'll happily ramble onto myself. Will update with weight, measurements etc tomorrow xx
Hi yoyo, your diary reads like its describing me, except im older at 58 and I did go on to develop type 2 diabetes. So not only am I fat but I now run the risk of going blind as well, unless a stroke gets me first of course. DONT go down the route of bringing on diabetes. Do something about it now, you will be amazed by how quickly you will lose weight and look and feel so much better. You can do it, but ONLY you can do it.
I see you started at 14st 10lb, that's pretty much the weight I am now, but not so long ago I was over 18st. Its funny though because I feel good at this weight and you feel bad at it. Its perspective see, get to grips now because you will end up 18st too wishing you were 14st 10lb.
Losing weight is one issue, keeping it off is a whole other ball game, but cross that bridge when you get to it. You can do it, you can do it, you can do it.
Thanks for the words of advice Lily - I'm probably half a stone heavier than my old weight now. I have put on around 1.5 stone since I started my new job ten months ago. The diabetes definitely worries me as it's quite close to home and one of the nurses at my work said if you were overweight there was a 30% chance of developing it, and if you have a family member that's another 30% chance too, so 60% sounds quite scary. I definitely don't want to develop diabetes through something that is preventable - fair enough, I can't do owt about the family connection but I could knock off a percentage through a healthy diet.
Originally Posted by Arum Lilly
URGGHHHH got weighed this morning and am a depressing, gigantic 15st 8.2lbs. This is officially the heaviest I have ever weighed. I was 13st 10lbs when I started my new job on 19th November 2012. That's 26lbs in 10 months! Disgusting. I could cry.
So now I have got that out of the way, I need to think about what diet I want to do. Part of me has a knee jerk reaction of wanting to do a milkshake diet because I know the weight will come off quickly but I know deep down that it will probably go back on quickly too.
Next best thing would be 5:2 as I did quite well on that a few weeks ago losing 6lbs in three weeks, but then I fell off the wagon and put the 6lbs on in a week and then more.
So I guess I am going to calorie count for the time being and when my appetite has lessened and my stomach has shrunk a bit I will maybe give that another go. My Fitness Pal has suggested 1520 calories for 1lb weekly weight loss.
God, I feel so disheartened right now as it's going to be months before my work trousers fit comfortably and anyone notices a difference :-( (sorry to start off on a downer)
It wont be months, not if you start right now. Ive been doing my own version of 5:2, which is actually 4:3 as we are living in Tenerife for a few months. It would be way too easy for me to be in holiday mode and say to hell with it but I havnt. I desperately need to get my weight and my blood glucose down to a healthy level as ive been unwell with diabetes for some while. Also im older than you so weight loss has slowed up, but doing 4:3 ive lost 8kgs in just under 4 weeks, that translates to around 17lb or 18lb? and thats with eating out 4 times a week! intermittent fasting is the way to do it.
On my fasting days I have a replacement meal shake for lunch and about 200 cals worth of salad for dinner. The salad is psychological for my husband lol, he hates me living on meal replacement shakes as they ae not 'proper' food, I actually really like them. If it were not for him my fasting day would be 2 meal replacement shakes.
On my non fasting days we are eating out in the evening, but im just having something like chicken breast and salad or fish and salad, no potatoes, but I might have a crusty roll if they are served. Lunch is made by hubby, he buys 1 smallish baguette from the local shop and takes it back to the villa and fills it with ham and salad and cuts in half so we have half each with a piece of fruit and a can of diet coke. Breakfast is usually some fruit, melon mainly, although at the moment we are eating fresh pineapple. I also have 1 or 2 (or 3 yesterday!) glasses of red wine on my non fasting days.
On this regime ive lost well over a stone and don't feel at all deprived. Did you see the BBC Horizon program about intermittent fasting? I found a link to it by accident just before I came out here and I found it very inspiring and it obviously works for me! I was originally worried that on the non fasting days I would go overboard with food, but it didn't work out that way at all. I found the first 2 or 3 fasting days difficult as I got dizzy from lack of food, but not hungry at all. However now I can do fasting days with no problem at all, especially knowing that I only have to do it for 1 day each time. My weight has dropped and even more important in just 4 weeks ive turned dangerously high blood glucose levels into just over normal levels, and some days slightly under normal. The down side is that ive brought a limited amount of clothing with me and its all starting to get quite baggy!
Today you feel depressed about the weight, I totally understand and sympathise with you on that. You feel as if its almost too much to deal with, but you have to do it 1 day at a time. This time next week you could well have lost half a stone, or even be in the high 14's! just think about that. If I were you, I would do 1 week of total solution on meal replacements .That will shift 8 or 10lb easily. Then go onto intermittent fasting using the meal replacements on fasting days, so that your body is getting food every other day and that way you will avoid the rebound weight gain you get from total solution dieting. That damn work uniform will soon be baggy again.
Don't feel disheartened already! It may seem like a long road and I too have a long road but it will be worth it for us in the end. Buy some trousers one size smaller and aim to fit them and then have them fit loosely, it will happen so much sooner than you imagine I guarantee you.
I am only having 450 cals per day but it so surprising how quickly your body adjusts to the change. You can do it, stay focused and strong and we'll be supporting you!
Thanks for the reply Molly. I do have 2 pairs of work trousers at the moment, 1 is a 16 and 1 is a 14 (I knew I would yo-yo) and they are a large size too. The 14's fit me when I started there (at 13st 10lbs) so I've a while to go to fit into those yet x
Originally Posted by mollyantoinette
You have definitely got more willpower than me, to go on holiday and carry on your plan - well done! 17-18lbs in four weeks is an amazing loss. Unfortunately although my weight goes on fast it comes off slow, and in three weeks I had only lost 6lbs. I do want to try and get back to 5:2 eventually but do need my stomach to shrink a bit. Of course your clothes will be baggy cos you've definitely lost a dress size there (woohoo)
I have never seen the TV programme although I have bought a book about 5:2 so understand the science behind it. If I get a spare hour I might try and find it on you tube.
I do like milkshakes, like the taste of them and after the first couple of days find it really easy but I think I need to cut down on the sugar and eat less carbs before attempting to embark upon them. It's a good idea though to do it for just one week then do 5:2, I'll definitely think about that. I do have about a week's worth of meal replacements in the kitchen...
Here is a link to the Horizon program, I don't think it is on youtube as I have searched for it there
Eat, Fast and Live Longer - Horizon on Vimeo
Good luck in you're journey and try to think positive, you've set a goal now perhaps sit and thinks of all the other reasons you want to loose weight. There is tonnes of support on here x x
It's a good motivation to really see the difference, I have a size 14 dress I bought in may, thinking I'd diet and lose weight for July but never got around to that either ! So looking forward to getting into that! Hope your coping alright! Xxx
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