So, here I am again. It's been a couple of years since i was on this site but my struggles remain the same. I look at the success stories and think.. Sheesh, had I stuck to it I'd be a success story! .. I seem to stay within the same 20 pound bracket and can go up and down by 4 pounds in one day.

Anyway, Atkins it is for me as I am a monster when I eat sugar (or anything sugar related, breads, pasta, rice, potatoes).. so I really need to go cold turkey with this one and get back into it again. I lost 18 pounds on induction, the first time I did it. But the last few times I've started I haven't lost too much at all.. I get too distracted I think and instead of counting carbs my head takes over and I just think "Cheese, that's ok, cream that's ok too'.. etc and it's obviously adding up) The difficulty with these past few years has been immense stress (including ill health, caring for sick loved ones, emigrating!, struggling with adapting, and my mid life crisis! 40, still single, no children (and I have always wanted them!). Of course I put it all down to being overweight.. I've always been hard on myself. I try to teach others to find the positives in every day life but rarely do the same.. so my own diet/health has taken a back burner. I've found myself grazing all day long, not really eating meals unless I'm with family or friends..so I have a few habits to change!

I introduced two members of my family to Atkins at the beginning of January and made their meal plans etc They've both lost a stone (14 pounds) during this month. I haven't been as restricted as they have due to too much grazing (nuts, cheese, cream in coffee etc). But I'll try again and figure out what I can have when I do need to graze. I'll probably have to ditch the diet soda (I drink 1 or 2 cans a day).

So, I'll be reading the posts here, trying to get motivated again and try not to be so hard on myself.. this is NOT what I have to be. I CAN do it.. and with two family members doing this I should have more support than I've ever had.. (although, they're lucky as neither of them graze and neither like sweet things!)..

Weight loss really is about sorting out the head.. and I'm making plans to do that..

I shall be heading over to the menu boards to find out what everyone's eating and try to get some realistic recipes sorted out. I find if I"m not organised with meal ideas then I struggle when I'm hungry and looking for something. I may have to put some snacks in the fridge and try my damnedest to get out and move about a bit!..

Ok, first entry done.. this is certainly a work in progress. I have 9 weeks until I head to California to see some old friends, I really hope I can lose a decent amount of weight in that time and not let the bully in my head tell me it's not worth the effort.. or that I"m ok the way I am or even that I'll never do it..

Highest Weight: 255lbs
Current weight: 216llbs
Goal Weight: 154llbs