AngelWings
Professional Sky Dancer
Would you date someone who didn't want to date you while you were overweight, but suddenly developed interest in you once you were thinner/at your ideal weight?
I'm already in a relationship with a wonderful man whom, thanks to having a heavier mother whom he loves dearly, is very fat-accepting when it comes to his partner. He cares more about my health than my waistline, so I'm thankful for him and know that he is a truly rare bird.
However, before I met him and when I was single, I'd always contemplate this scenario I described above. I've known men who liked me as a person and thought I was pretty, but since my body wasn't fitting into a US size 6, I wasn't their type and they wanted nothing to do with me.
So I've often fantasized in the past what would happen if I had hit that magic dress size number... what would I have done? Would I have given the relationship a chance? Or would I deny them in a dramatic Mariah Carey "Someday" interpretive dance because they were being shallow and only wanting me at my best and never at my worst?
What would you guys and gals do in such a situation? Do you think it's fair for potential partners to put such superficial standards on you, and until you reach those standards they want nothing to do with you? OR do you think that they have a point, and that dating someone when they are not "healthy" is not a good idea, and they may be doing it to protect themselves from getting into some sort of unhealthy relationship since they may see the excess weight as a "danger sign" that you still have issues to deal with (or, at least, that's what they say, but deep down they just really want someone with a body they find attractive and nothing more)?
I'm already in a relationship with a wonderful man whom, thanks to having a heavier mother whom he loves dearly, is very fat-accepting when it comes to his partner. He cares more about my health than my waistline, so I'm thankful for him and know that he is a truly rare bird.
However, before I met him and when I was single, I'd always contemplate this scenario I described above. I've known men who liked me as a person and thought I was pretty, but since my body wasn't fitting into a US size 6, I wasn't their type and they wanted nothing to do with me.
So I've often fantasized in the past what would happen if I had hit that magic dress size number... what would I have done? Would I have given the relationship a chance? Or would I deny them in a dramatic Mariah Carey "Someday" interpretive dance because they were being shallow and only wanting me at my best and never at my worst?
What would you guys and gals do in such a situation? Do you think it's fair for potential partners to put such superficial standards on you, and until you reach those standards they want nothing to do with you? OR do you think that they have a point, and that dating someone when they are not "healthy" is not a good idea, and they may be doing it to protect themselves from getting into some sort of unhealthy relationship since they may see the excess weight as a "danger sign" that you still have issues to deal with (or, at least, that's what they say, but deep down they just really want someone with a body they find attractive and nothing more)?