Bit depressing, sorry....

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Sappho, 21 February 2008 Social URL.

  1. Sappho

    Sappho Full Member

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    I am a little tired
    My hearts a little sore
    There's a bit of me who's feeling
    I can't do this anymore
    The wounds I have to close
    Are buried far too deep
    And I think it would be easier
    Just to let them sleep
    I don't want to go there
    to look at what's inside
    I just want to curl up tight
    I just want to hide
    Food I call the enemy
    but it's often been a friend
    I feel so very tired
    I just want to find an end
     
    x-Katie-x and mustdoit like this.
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  3. FeelingFat

    FeelingFat Silver Member

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    Oh Sappho you sound so sad. You nearly made me:cry:.

    Hope you're okay.

    Take care
    Feelingfat
     
  4. Hedgemag

    Hedgemag Cambridge Diet Counsellor

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    Oh That has brought a tear to my eye and I lump to my throat.

    I hope you are ok hunni. sending you loads of {{{hugs}}}
     
  5. Elie

    Elie Silver Member

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    Hi Sappho!

    I hope you are OK sweetie.

    Thinking of you.

    Elie xxxxx
     
  6. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    <<<Hugs>>>> Saph, honey, sorry you are having a blue day. But try to remember, it is just one day. Tomorrow is another, and it can be brighter. I am sorry you are struggling and feeling so down....what can we do to help? Is it that you are feeling hunger? Or is it the goal is in the distance? We are all here to help. and if you are comfortable, you couldn't tell us anything we have probably not felt ourselves. So if it helps you, spill it our here so we can help.

    I kow you don't want to give in. I know that by your earlier poems, which were bright and hopeful and full of optomistic dreams. So there is a part of you who knows you can do this and who wants to do this. And today there is another side of you that is fighting you.

    I know which side you want to win I think, and I think you can win.

    Don't ever feel like you are a lone in this. We are ALL there with you. There is strength in numbers, so if you are feeling weak, take some of our strength - I know you return it on the flipside.

    Hugs to you, sending healing vibes and sending positive hopeful thoughts your way.

    XXX
     
  7. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    Hi Sappo,

    That was a lovely poem and I know what you mean. I have had times when I thought is this worth all the pain. Because that is what you get sometimes when you cant go and stuff some of the feelings out of the way.

    But believe me you can do it and you will find another way to deal with it which is what is needed.

    Keep going girl and keep writing your poems are beautiful.
    :hug99:
     
  8. mustdoit

    mustdoit susan

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    xxx
     
  9. Tange

    Tange Silver Member

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    Oh Saphs

    I think you have the same little issue I have and probably some others too. I used food to cover up some things I really did not want brought back to the surface.

    Oh honey, remember you are doing this for you. Who are you not to be a fantastic person who also happens to be sexy and slim. have a good look at that baggage (forgive me for calling it this its how I see mine) see how long you have carried it, do you want to carry it some more. Can you change it, can you change how you think about it.

    You have the right to be happy.
    Before I preach too much, just know there are others out there that are going through just what you are.

    Hang in there girl, we are stronger than we think.

    Remember your thoughts create your reality. ( I know I used to hate people saying that to me)

    Big hug
    Tan
     
  10. Sappho

    Sappho Full Member

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    Thank you all. I have been feeling quite withdrawn over the last week or so, like I am putting a shell round me cos without food to suppress things I suppose the shell is to keep those feelings inside. I dont know if I am ready to think about those things but without food I dont seem to have any choice because there is nothing to keep them at bay (if that makes any sense).

    At our meeting this week we talked about parent messages and I found it really really hard.

    Dont get me wrong, its not that I am going to eat, I have urges obviously but I have not considered it. It is just that I think the time has come in my life when I have to deal with the child inside me who is still hurting from all that went on in her lifetime and that is a very scary place to visit.

    I thought about writing it all down but just cant bring myself to pick up the pen at the mo.

    Just in a bit of a sad place inside.

    Thanks for all your support, you guys are great. x
     
  11. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Oh Sappho, I really wish there was something that I could say or do that would make it all easier for you - food is a cushion and a shield and it is and can be really difficult without it but I'm really hoping that you can do this without it upsetting you too much.

    xxx
     
  12. Slimseaa

    Slimseaa Silver Member

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    Sappho, that was a lovely but extremley sad poem. I too felt choked reading that! :sigh: You are doing well, pls don't give up, think of it this way, it's only short-term, you have the rest of your life to look good and be healthy (long-term) :D, when this is over with.

    We are all here to support one another! You take care ok! God Bless

    :hug99:
     
  13. bexnkev

    bexnkev Silver Member

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    Sappho, so sorry to hear you are sad, you will get that, it won't be easy but you really will get there ((((hugs))))
    Your poem was poignant x
     
  14. Time4ME

    Time4ME MUST get a grip

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    Bless you - I'm feeling a wee bit blue myself.... Hope you're ok, come on we can do this - for ourselves..... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  15. ponseta

    ponseta Full Member

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    yeah, well done on the poem....
     
  16. Sappho

    Sappho Full Member

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    I ate toast :(:(:(:(
     
  17. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    In that case, I propose a toast:

    Here is to Sappho, who could have eaten far worse things, and to her moving on from this one very minor blip!

    <klink>


    Don;t worry hon...you culd have done a lot worse!!!

    XX
     
    Kellie=] likes this.
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  19. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Yep I'm with BL on this - you could have done so much worse.

    You've just got to put it behind you honey and move on from it - you've ate it and now you look forward rather than back and just try and get through the rest of today without eating anything xx
     
  20. Kellie=]

    Kellie=] Silver Member

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    pah! whats a big of toast?
    get some water down ya and climb back on the wagon :)
    keep ur chin up kiddo- it'll get better soon xxxxxx
     
  21. SoonBeSlim... It'sTrue!

    SoonBeSlim... It'sTrue! Full Member

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    Thought your poems were so true and from the heart.

    They choked me, but in a good way.

    I belive most of us have something inside to a greater or lesser extent we need to deal with and challenge. As I get closer to it, it is often harder to put all my good strategies in place. I too find my face in the toaster via the breadbin!!!!!!

    Dam the carbs. lol

    Hope you are feeling better and remember, one bit at a time.

    Many of us got where we are today after a prolonged period of time (not just weight either), however I know I expect to be HEALED after a few weeks in management.

    Anyway, enough of my ramble

    Take Care

    Sam xx
     
  22. Sappho

    Sappho Full Member

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    Thanks guys, you have put things into perspective a bit, I still feel disgusted with myself though, and it was quite a lot of toast! I just feel like a complete loser and I think I am gonna be stuck on this merrygoround forever. Also, havent a clue what to say to my councillor, I am the only one in the group who has gone off the wagon, I feel like such a pratt. Sorry to be such a downer, going to go and watch amercial idol to cheer myself up. Love you guys you are all brill x x x x
     
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