Dieting under stress......

Discussion in 'Slimming World Off Topic' started by *honey, 27 August 2010 Social URL.

  1. *honey

    *honey Silver Member

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    Hi bought this funny tea towel the other week which now hangs in my kitchen.

    DIETING UNDER STRESS
    10 rules on how to combine a successful diet with life as a normal human being!
    1) If you eat something and no one see's you then the food has no calories
    2)when you eat with someone else, the calories do not count if they eat more than you.
    3)If you drink a diet coke with a chocolate bar, the diet coke cancels out the calories of the chocolate.
    4) roken biscuits contain no calories - the process of breaking causes calorie leakage
    5) Food used for medicinal purposes never counts; eg chocolate for relaxation, brandy for fortification and toast and cheesecake as anti depressants
    6) Its recomended that you fatten everyone up around you making you look slimmer
    7) food licked off cutlery or out of a bowl has no calories if you are following a recipe eg butter icing on a cake, the remains of scone mixture, cream for the trifle
    8) TV and cinema food contain no calories as they are all part of the whole entertainment package.
    9) foods of the same colour have the same calories ie spinach and mint ice cream, mushrooms and white chocolate, water and a large gin
    10) Atheletes can eat huge amounts of pasta before races like the marathon. Its a myth that you have to run 26 miles to work it off. one brisk trot around the settee is quite sufficient to wipe out one bowl of spaghetti. twice round the living room will use up so much energy that a chocolate bar is required to supplememnt your sugar level and rebuild your strength.
    GOOD LUCK

    hahahahaha
     
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  3. zombiecakes

    zombiecakes Will be slinky!

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    If only!
     
  4. *EB*

    *EB* Gold Member

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    can i add my own?

    On a Krispy Kreme box there is no Nutritional information - this means there are no calories in them.

    This also applies to other donuts, and cookies that are fresh baked - no NI = no syns/calories!!!

    enjoy! :D x
     
  5. *honey

    *honey Silver Member

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    Absolutely!! i like that one
     
  6. fillymum

    fillymum synful soul

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    Love it !!!!!!

    No one can argue with the logic here ..........certainly not me !!!
     
  7. donnajt

    donnajt Addicted to Minimins!

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    have you tried the Seafood Diet?

    Really easy to follow, takes no planning and no cooking is required,

    "just seafood and eat it!
     
  8. daisymae2

    daisymae2 Full Member

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    Gosh that's amazing. They're the same rules I live my life by. Lol
     
  9. JemmaBe

    JemmaBe Silver Member

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    I love the broken biscuit one :D

    And it doesn't count if someone eats more than you haha.
     
  10. Sarah-Jayne

    Sarah-Jayne Gold Member

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    Love it! Especially number 8 and 9 xx
     
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