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Feeling guilty - rubbish friend alert

#1
Hi All

I was due to go on a night out with my friend tonight - it's her birthday. There are a gang of people going.
Originally I had planned to come off plan for it and have a drink and then I decided that I didn't want to do that so would avoid alcohol.
Now it's come to Saturday I just can't face going, because;
  • Everyone else will be drinking in a noisy bar in town and I will be sitting there with water
  • I don't feel like I am any fun in those situations
  • There are loads of couples going and I am single atm
All of which makes me self centred and horrible. I chose to do this diet and the results are marvellous but I have had no social life for three months as it ALL revolves around eating and drinking.
I know this attitude stinks and I should be able to go out and have fun with no alcohol but I can't. So my self imposed incarceration goes on...
Am also thinking that I could stop this diet and be able to eat and drinkn again but I have come too far and am soo scared that I will just balloon.
Do I just need a kick up the a*se? Maybe..
Ellie xx:cry:
 
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#2
Unfortuantly I am one of those people who is an all or nothing kind of person, I wouldn't be able to go out on a night out and not drink so therefore I am boring and stay in. Also I couldn't go off plan for one day and then back to it the next because I would be hanckering after enjoying myself. It would lead to a slippery slope for me.

At the end of the day only you know what you can and can't do and if staying in is the answer then thats what you have to do for now and your friends should really understand.
 

Zoe.D

loving life
#6
You are not self centered or horrible hun, you are just trying to look after yourself and know whats best for you at the moment. If you are avoiding a situation because you know you are gonna have a miserable time and maybe risk going off the rails on your diet all for the sake of one night out then it sounds like your being pretty sensible to me and your friend should understand and want whats best for you too. The nights out are still gonna be there when you have got to goal and you are going to feel great attending them feeling so much better about yourself and proud of yourself for sticking to it. Good luck xx
 
#8
I'd either have to come off plan for a day (having done this I know I can get back on) or not go either.
I know a lot of people can and do go out and enjoy themselves without drinking and that's fine. I don't miss drink and if I went out to the cinema or something none drink related I'd be fine, but a night in a bar, with everyone else drinking, couldn't do it.
So I know how you feel!

On the plus side, the closer you stick to it, the quicker you will get to goal. I would feel guilty, but you're not a bad friend or self centred. Why should how someone else feels be more important to you than how you feel? You should be the most important person in your world and there's nothing wrong with that :)
 
#9
I mean slices of lemon and slices of lime, just makes me think its G&T.
CDC hasn't told me I cant have them, I dont eat them
I'd have thought that the juice that comes out of the lemon or lime would be in the water? Full of Citric Acid.... I don't actually know if you can or can't have lemon or lime in water but I would have thought it was a big no.
 
#11
Thanks ladies!
Merriefach - you are obviously one of those people that I envy who doesn't need to get drunk to have fun with drunk people! But I know I would have a gob on me after about ten minutes.
Thinking it through though - I may start working up the plans when I get to three stone gone. I have loads of social events and trips away planned in during August and September and at least this way I won't be sending my body into total shock? P.S. Lemon and lime in water definitely not allowed!
 
#13
S** it, that's how I was planning to get through a wedding next week! Didn't effect me last weekend
If it doesn't seem to affect you, maybe don't worry about it? xx
 

moti17

is gonna do it!!
#14
Im the same , if I cant drink I woldnt go.
Sometimes it really feels like our lifes are on hold doesn't it!
At least she has other friends going out with her, so you haven't really left her in the lurch or anything have you, so fret not my dear, just think of how good you'll feel when your at goal, in a bar, shaking what your mama gave ya!
(thats what im gonna do!)
 
#15
Im the same , if I cant drink I woldnt go.
Sometimes it really feels like our lifes are on hold doesn't it!
At least she has other friends going out with her, so you haven't really left her in the lurch or anything have you, so fret not my dear, just think of how good you'll feel when your at goal, in a bar, shaking what your mama gave ya!
(thats what im gonna do!)
Love it!!
 
#16
Ah, b*gger it - am gonna take the car and go for an hour! Am just sitting here sulking otherwise! xx
 
#18

curlywurly1234

Cambridge Consultant
#20
Hey Ellie,
I personally would say GO have a good time and enjoy yourself!! Its not all about the food and drink hon..... Well thats me anyway.. I am not saying Im perfect but I have been on so many social occasions whilst on CD and I defiantely would not let it stop me doing things that I have arranged to do hon... I just felt better sitting there knowing that I was getting thiner watching everyone else drinking and eating.
Everyone has to do what is right for them hon and if you feel that strongly about not going then dont go but its a shame to miss out of your friends birthday just because your not 'drinking'..
xxx
 


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