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GRRR other peoples opinions!!

#1
The other night at WI, whilst waiting in the queue to get weighed I got talking to this other woman. She has been attending our group for about a month.

She said to me "I dont know why you are coming to group you don't need to loose any weight" I then informed her that I had already lost a stone and half since January and my BMI was still in the overweight category. She then said surely that can't be right. Even though I am going of BMI I think I know when I will feel happy with my weight and don't need anyone to tell me when I have lost enough. :rant2:

I have set my initial target as 2 stone loss but will take it down at half stone intervals when I get there.

She put me in a really bad mood until I stepped on the scales and found I had lost 5 and a half pounds. (did have a gain the week before).


On another note, our usual consultant was ill this week and we had a stand in one and she told all the members about this site.;);)
 
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#3
yes that has happened to me 3 times in WI's hence why i dont go to group anymore - older ladies think they are being kind and ask why i was going, i didnt need to loose any, silly wasting my time etc....

I am 2.5 stones overweight so i definately need to loose it - i dont turn to them and say you really need to loose weight love! know they are probably trying to be kind, but its really off putting when trying to focus on weight loss :(

excellent loss for you!!!!
 

sonkie

Gold Member
#4
Some people are insensitive......though I must admit to thinking that when I had been to some groups........but that was aimed at the stick insects just starting.......not the original gang.

Well done on your loss......keep up the great work.
 

evilpenguin

Not evil at all
#5
Louise, firstly well done on your 5.5lb loss! Secondly, just ignore her! People are such morons when it comes to diets and weight, they think they know everything about someone elses body. I would tell her to mind her own business!
 
#7
Agree with what Tinkerbellmum says. It was almost certainly meant as a compliment.
I go to a group where the majority are much older women, sometimes there is a distinct lack of tact, but I do know that anything that is said is generally meant with the best intentions in mind.
So, think about that compliment - you are obviously looking really good. Don't let it deter you from your own personal journey.
Smile and let it all wash over you :-D
 

Mrs V

Loves Life!
#8
I have to agree with the others Hun. Firstly well done a fantastic loss this week - wow!
Secondly as the others have said, you obviously look good enough for this woman to compliment you as she did. I dont think it was meant to be a dig at you Hun, perhaps she just couldnt see why you were there when you look so good?
Dont let it get to you Hun, you keep going until you are happy and thats the only thing you should be thinking of.

xxx
 
#9
I have learnt this week that people totally feel they have a right to comment on others weight and eating habits!!!!

Ignore her - she is silly

However I have been at wi before (on ww) and said to someone "oooo you dont look like you need to lose weight" not being mean or funny just pointing out they look lovely and slim already, but I then say in the next breath "but it is how you feel about yourself that counts"

My mate is skinny, a size 8 but feels she is "fat" cos she has gained 7lbs recently, as much as it annoys me cos i weight almost double the amount of her I totally get that she is very unhappy about it

Horses for courses.... lol

Good luck with your journey

x
 

Wee Doll

Silver Member
#10
ive thought about not going to group cause of this there is new people joined my group who have lost a stone in like 3 weeks and i heard them talking about me saying why was i there cause my legs and everything were really skinny i never needed to be there ... i know they were not being to mean but im not there to lose weight off my arms and legs i need to lose weight to feel better and also im going to start a course to become a fitness instructor and i need to be slender. fit and healthy.

i dont think people realise they are being so insensitive. i think im going to bring it up in class tonight because its not just me im sure that feels this way
 
#11
sadly this is quite common! i think its really unfair of others to assume what is the right weight for someone else and if or not there is "a need" to be a SW

Truthfully, so many people assume that weight loss clubs a solely for people in the morbidly obese catergory and once you are just in the overweight category there is no longer any need to come!! there is such a thing called maintenance as well and not to mention that the people who still come and they are at target still probably need support as well!
 

tara40

Loves Norman Reedus
#12
Well done on your weight loss.
I am sick of other peoples opinions. It's our body and we can loose or gain as we see fit.
Personally I just think that she is jealous as you must look fab. You keep going until you feel comfortable.
I havent set a PAT yet. Would like to be around 10stone, but if i went to 9.13, then i could say that i was under 10stone. he he
 
#13
i know what you mean. My mum of nearly 66 looks damn good for her age, but she still worries about her weight... but I've learned to let it go, if she's unhappy the way she is, why should I stop her?
 

Hayleyj123

Wannabe Loser
#14
Firstly, well done on your loss, that is fantastic!! You must ahve had a really good week. (got any tips lol)

As for the unwanted advice... just ignore it. You need to be happy with yourself and just because she thinks you don't need to lose anymore.. it doesn't mean that you have to agree with her.

Keep up the good work, you've put me to shame :p
 
#15
I get similar comments when I go to weigh in but I always take them as compliments. I know I still want to lose a bit to feel happy with my weight so I will continue with the weight loss, but I love it when people say things like that to me :)

Well done on the 5lb loss!
 
#16
I think it's funny how it seems acceptable to tell someone they look too skinny but no one would ever say to someone "Oh you should diet, you're too fat!"
 

IanH

Silver Member
#17
I wish i would have someone say that to me - i've been waiting for that line for ages as i have the perfect response - "i look like i don't need a "diet" group - because i do come to group". (of course i then have the before pictures i can show them to see why i went through the doors in the first place - with the extra 13.5+stone i used to have).
 


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