Husband is overweight but eats less than me!?!

Discussion in 'General Weight Loss Discussion' started by judywoody, 29 May 2011 Social URL.

  1. judywoody

    judywoody Full Member

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    My husband has put on quite a lot of weight since we started courting and got married. But I always ate a lot more than him. Ok, I am now overweight, too but only because I started working from home..haven't changed the amount of food I am eating - I used to be 2.5 stone less. But he still doesn't eat that much. He often eats not very healthily but he never really did and he used to be a lot slimmer. He's got ulceritive colitis and for some time he just lived on flapjacks, yogurt and fruit and one small meal a day. He was stick thin then. He only does that when it all flares up again. His UC is only moderate so he doesn't have a flare up often these days. But as soon as he starts eating like a normal person again (and I mean normal - he doesn't eat over healthily but he doesn't eat junk food either. He eats lots of yogurt and fruit, too) he gains weight. All in all I think he eats way below what a man his height should be eating in calories. He doesn't eat breakfast either which could be a problem but his total calorific intake shouldn't affect his body weight that much. He hasn't had a flare up for ages and he also stopped working in a physical job which made him gain weight. But he still doesn't eat that much. When I try and feed him a special diet (whithout him noticing :) ) he doesn't lose weight either...what could be wrong with him? His BMI is almost 30 now. He is only little (5.7 ft) but he weighs over 13 stone.

    Any idea? He doesn't like going to the GP for stuff like that - and I think he is less concerned than I am...
     
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  3. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    Hi Judywoody --

    My DH is 5'6" -- in January he weighed 14 stone 2. He knew he was obese. I had started back on CDSS on December 27th because I has allowed myself to gain back about 2.5 stone of the nearly 5 I lost in 2008. (I have relost about 2 stone and want to lose another stone. I switched to CD810/1000 after about 3 weeks of sole source.)

    Anyway, when DH weighed himself on January 2nd and discovered that he weighed nearly 200 pounds he has shocked. He had added the weight over the years... and had no idea how much he gained. (A couple of times he dieted and lost about 2 stone, then spent a couple of years gaining it back).

    Anyway, not eating is not for him -- but the last time he lost 2 stone he did it the South Beach Diet. So, he decided to do this -- I did all his cooking and shopping, and he followed the diet (including no alcohol, processed carbs, etc.). He has lost over 3 stone and now weighs less than he has in over 20 years! He has a bmi of about 25 and looks and feels great. He has gone from a tight 34" waist trouser to a loose 31" waist trouser.

    The people he works with a stunned and several of them are using this diet. The diet was developed by a cardiologist for his patients to improve their health -- and the weight loss was just an added bonus.

    His weight seems to be stabilised at this 3 stones off, but he is upping his exercise as he would like to drop to a bmi of about 23.

    BTW -- he does not have a high metabolism at all. He has always gained weight easily and is now over 50.

    Mel
     
  4. judywoody

    judywoody Full Member

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    Wow, good on him!!

    Unfortunately my hubby just tends to blame it on his age and claims he can't do nothing about it - to be honest, I am quite surprised myself because he doesn't eat that much. Otherwise I could tell him why he gained weighed. Problem is, one minute he is totally shocked by the number on the scales and next minute he turns around and moans when I suggest to write down a food log. I think I need more psychology with him. He doesn't usually sneak out an buy food for himself, he just eats what is in the cupboards and fridge. I don't store sweets or crappy food. So he hasn't got much choice..but still.

    Then I tell him about Slimming World and he loves the idea to eat without counting calories but then he realizes he needs to measure things like cereals and he can't be as flexible (like putting mayo on is boiled potatoes and salmon...yuck!). When I tell him he can't do that without measuring he starte moaning about that. I mean it can't be any easier than Slimming World for a man, can it??

    The upshot of it is: He wants to eat what he wants and still lose weight. I can't change him but it't difficult to encourage him. I didn't say anything for a while but now I am trying to lose weight myself I was hoping he would jump on the wagon with me. Anyways, the whole problem is that I don't understand WHY he is overweight at all as he really doesn't eat much at all. He often doesn't eat anthing until 2 pm. Then he has some yogurt and fruit and then he eats nothing until dinner. Then he gets up at night and eats more yogurt and fruit. I mean, any other man would be stick thin!! He doesn't even drink...sometimes he likes his snickers and snacks on cheese (on the rare occasion we have any) but he doesn't eat that very often either.. I just don't get it...!?!
     
  5. woodmouse

    woodmouse Gold Member

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    Hi! I wonder whether he is actually eating enough calories? I copied the below from another post as it gives the reasoning behind this:

    "Not eating enough calories. It may seem counterintuitive, but eating too little can actually stall your efforts to lose fat. As Cathy Leman, a registered dietician and creator of NutriFit! says, "...if there is a severe restriction in calories, the body may counteract this reduction by slowing down its metabolism." Be sure you're eating enough calories to sustain your body...."

    That is, your body goes into starvation mode and holds on to all the fat it can!

    Also, eating some sort of breakfast is beneficial because it's supposed to kickstart your metabolism for the day.

    If you wanted to try psychology on him, it might just work if you bring up the idea that he might actually need to eat more. Of the right foods, of course! :)
     
  6. judywoody

    judywoody Full Member

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    Yes this is probably and explanation why he doesn't lose weight but I am still not sure about the reasons as to why he gained weight in the first place....Can you gain weight by not eating enough?
     
  7. Legomom

    Legomom Gold Member

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    The girls on the CC board have argued this thru a few times! The general consensus is that you should eat a NET intake of 1200 for women an 1500 for men unless supervised by a professional. Try calorie counting what he's eating NOW and see if it's under 1500? Coz that may be the problem? Some of the CC girls swear they CAN'T lose weight eating any less than that. Also look at his fat levels? If he's eating full fat yoghurts lots of full fat Mayo and other sauces etc it could be that his daily fat is way too high. You can sneakily fix this by buying low fat alternatives tho lol

    When I met my hubby he was badly underweight as he didn't eat all day and would then just grab some toast or cereal and go to bed! When I started cooking him meals he gained weight an looked much healthier! But when the kids came along I was really busy so I fed him a lot of ready meals etc to save time and he got a bit overweight lol I've never got him into the habit of breakfast and he never diets but I find if I'm cooking diet food he eats it and loses weight with ease!! Even tho I KNOW he eats junk at work and drinks too much beer!! It's so annoying!! He was chortling about fitting into an old shirt the other night with a bag of pretzels in one hand an a beer in the other while I nibbled on yet another apple and quietly plotted his murder in my head!!!!!

    Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
     
  8. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    I agree with Woodmouse -- if your calories are too low then your body holds on to any and all for dear life and it thinks you are living in a time of famine. Also, you need to eat breakfast in order to start your metabolism going.
    Try to get him to drink 3 litres of water a day, too. And what you eat is important -- no processed carbs, a low fat (but no added salt or sugar) is important.

    Mel
     
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