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I could break down in tears!

#1
Hi everyone, as some of you may or may not know I am moving soon.

Some of you may or may not know i was gonna lose my job.

I have depression and find things very difficult to cope with when it upsets my routine.

I have a full time job and a part time job.

My own house, bills and debts.

Plus my other half who has mental health issues and a "friend" (term used loosely) who just dumps her kids on me so she can have a life.

I could deal with all of those...... just about until my boss dropped a bombshell on me today...

They are sacking me and keeping my colleague on to train staff when she can barely cope with her job! the only reason she copes is because I help her all the time!

I only have a job until the 26th of march and i thought it was until the end may.

I cant leave my job even thought im unhappy as i cant claim JSA because i would of chosen to leave.

I dont know if i can wake up every morning drag my hulking great big frame out of my pit and face it anymore.

Sorry people i know i can always count on you!

I have just had enough i'm trying to cope with everything and lose weight and im bushed! im totaly wiped out! i just cant deal or cope anymore with everything.. Iv had enough and im nearly ready to give up.

I'm sick of trying my hardest and my best and it never being good enough....I'm never ever good enough unless someone needs me for doing there dirty work.

I just wanna crawl under a stone and never come out.
 
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S: 13st9lb C: 12st10lb G: 12st8lb BMI: 31.5 Loss: 0st13lb(6.81%)
#2
oh sweetheart big(((((hugs)))))) I'm so sorry that all this has happened to you. So much to deal with and without a lot of support from home. Try and rememebr a time when you felt really strong and tap into that to see if it helps a little bit. Be kind to yourself and if the plan seems too hard to stick, to try again the next day. Do you ahve any family nearby you would want to call? Hang on in there.
sending some sunshine
xx
 

suepat10

I am one of the 63336
S: 20st3lb C: 20st3lb G: 12st7lb BMI: 44.3 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#3
Oh my word, you poor thing ((((((((((((( Hugs )))))))))))))))))

Why don't you go and have a chat with your doctor. Not to give you/increase any medication but they may know of support groups nearby as I feel you need some onhand support xx

Hang on in there, it WILL get better xxxxxxx
 
S: 14st13lb C: 14st13lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 38.2 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#4
(((Kissme))) my god you have so much on your plate.

These guys have been here for me so much when iv had so much thrown at me i feel so overwhelmed and couldnt cope, so i have no doubt that everyone will be able to offer your sound advise.


I am so sorry to hear about everything you have going on at the minute, its truely awful and alot to take in. ((hugs))

I completly agree with whats been said so far though, you need to speak to your GP so that you can see what can be done and get whatever help is available to you.


all my love
x
 
S: 14st13lb C: 14st7lb BMI: 30 Loss: 0st6lb(2.87%)
#5
i'd also be wondering if gp would sign you off for the next week, i dont think you owe them anything !!
 

*EB*

Gold Member
#6
my poor little KM! :( sending you a huge hug for starters.

Right - out of all your problems above which ones can you keep a control over? your weight is one i can think of!!! You can stick to this you know - losing your job wasnt your fault, your OH mental health sounds hard, but you cope already. Can you tell the friend not to dump her kids on you - sounds like she is a bit presumptious that you will have these - next time she calls tell her you cant help her out this time, she will soon get the hint.

You say you have a part time job - can you do more hours when your other job is finished?

Other ways to earn money are doing Avon/Ann Summers - I know people who do these Full time and earn well - something to consider.

Get yourself online - Reed.co.uk and Monster - and get your CV on there NOW! start applying for as many suitable jobs, I am sure your current employer will not be allowed to stop you going to interviews in your notice period.

I know today has come as a shock to you - but keep that lovely KM smile on - tomorrow will be a better day, and also I think everything happens for a reason - the brand new job of your dreams is just round the corner!!

good luck gorgeous xxx you can do it xxx
 

*EB*

Gold Member
#7
oh and also contact all your debtors (house, bills etc) and tell them what has happened - you might be able to get a payment holiday or at least some reduced period whilst you get things sorted.

xxx
 
S: 9st11lb C: 8st9lb G: 8st9lb BMI: 22.1 Loss: 1st2lb(11.68%)
#8
I'd agree with Ellebear, register with as many agencies as possible for both temporary & permanent work.

My daughter does Avon & earns c£150 per campaign but it does take time to build up a customer base & you do have to pay for your brochures & you have to place a min order of £75 before you earn commission. So even though this is a good idea it won't work immediately.

Re the 'friend' who dumps her kids, if you don't like to say no to her make sure you don't answer the door to her, let her think you are out.

If your boss is sacking you shouldn't you be going right away? Or are you begin made redundant if so you can claim JSA right away.
 

ilovelife

Wishing and hoping!
#9
I hope when the storm settles you find some peace within, change is horriable especially rountine but I am sure you will sort it out one way or another and regain control in your life to bring you happiness!
 

julie19

Silver Member
G: 10st0lb
#10
Kissme that is awful news for you & I wish I was there to give you a hug. I agree that you should go and see your doctor & see what they say. Can I also suggest that you contact this company called CCCS - 0800 138 1111, we contacted them for a similar situation we were in, they give a dedicated counsellor to help with your bills, tell you what you are able to do & also can advise of any benefits you can claim, they are a charity so you will not need to pay them a penny, the relief I felt just sharing the problems with them was immense, they don't judge they just help. Has your boss also put your termination on writing to you? If he has then you should still be able to claim because regardless that you were leaving he has fired you, although that in itself sounds a bit dodgy to me and I would also try to get some advice about that too. Good luck with everything & let us know how you get on.

xx
 
S: 14st6lb C: 13st9lb G: 12st4lb BMI: 29 Loss: 0st11lb(5.45%)
#11
Kissme, so sorry you have been through all that! Not much I can say really as the others have said it all!! *hugs* xx
 

alwyn

Silver Member
S: 80.29kg C: 80.29kg G: 60.33kg BMI: 29.5 Loss: 0kg(0%)
#12
Oh hon ((((((hugs))))))

I can't really add more than what other people have already said, except get your CV out there ASAP to try and secure another job - what is it that you do?

I personally wouldn't put my CV online because you end up getting loads of random agencies calling you. It's better to approach agencies yourself (not too many though) and get them to secure work for you.

Definitely get down the Job Centre and get the application started for JSA - as you're losing your job (presuming they're making you redundant, not sacking you :)) you should be entitled to this.

Keep your chin up chuck - you've got a massive support network here and we all want to see you happy. If you weren't happy in your job this could be a blessing in disguise - I've been there and I'm so much happier in the job I'm doing (even though it's only temporary).
 
#13
oh sweetheart big(((((hugs)))))) I'm so sorry that all this has happened to you. So much to deal with and without a lot of support from home. Try and rememebr a time when you felt really strong and tap into that to see if it helps a little bit. Be kind to yourself and if the plan seems too hard to stick, to try again the next day. Do you ahve any family nearby you would want to call? Hang on in there.
sending some sunshine
xx
Thanks hun, my mum lives in the flat below me but she has emphysema, kidney failiure and fybral miolgia plus my dad have chronic coronary heart disease... so they all have enough on there plates

Oh my word, you poor thing ((((((((((((( Hugs )))))))))))))))))

Why don't you go and have a chat with your doctor. Not to give you/increase any medication but they may know of support groups nearby as I feel you need some onhand support xx

Hang on in there, it WILL get better xxxxxxx
I went to see my docotr this morning and she has changed my anti depressants and upped the dose so hopefully that will help!

(((Kissme))) my god you have so much on your plate.

These guys have been here for me so much when iv had so much thrown at me i feel so overwhelmed and couldnt cope, so i have no doubt that everyone will be able to offer your sound advise.


I am so sorry to hear about everything you have going on at the minute, its truely awful and alot to take in. ((hugs))

I completly agree with whats been said so far though, you need to speak to your GP so that you can see what can be done and get whatever help is available to you.


all my love
x
Thanks hun!

i'd also be wondering if gp would sign you off for the next week, i dont think you owe them anything !!
Well I didnt ask to be signed off as it is only a week... wish i had now tho

my poor little KM! :( sending you a huge hug for starters.

Right - out of all your problems above which ones can you keep a control over? your weight is one i can think of!!! You can stick to this you know - losing your job wasnt your fault, your OH mental health sounds hard, but you cope already. Can you tell the friend not to dump her kids on you - sounds like she is a bit presumptious that you will have these - next time she calls tell her you cant help her out this time, she will soon get the hint.

You say you have a part time job - can you do more hours when your other job is finished?

Other ways to earn money are doing Avon/Ann Summers - I know people who do these Full time and earn well - something to consider.

Get yourself online - Reed.co.uk and Monster - and get your CV on there NOW! start applying for as many suitable jobs, I am sure your current employer will not be allowed to stop you going to interviews in your notice period.

I know today has come as a shock to you - but keep that lovely KM smile on - tomorrow will be a better day, and also I think everything happens for a reason - the brand new job of your dreams is just round the corner!!

good luck gorgeous xxx you can do it xxx

Hi hun im signed up with all of the agencies in my local area and my part time job is looking after my friend children so im stuck untill june really. I need to take control of my weight and i know i do, but its just another thing i cant keep control of. I feel so streched and find it hard at the moment to concentrate on anything!

Thanks for your kind words hun i know it will all be fine in the end!

oh and also contact all your debtors (house, bills etc) and tell them what has happened - you might be able to get a payment holiday or at least some reduced period whilst you get things sorted.

xxx
Thiose things are under control just about alot of my debtws get paid of at the ensd of this month, be cause there are so many bits everywhere it seems like i am getting nowhere when i know in my heart of hearts i have paid 4.5k at the end of this month so i know that will feel like a bit of the weight will be lifted

I'd agree with Ellebear, register with as many agencies as possible for both temporary & permanent work.

My daughter does Avon & earns c£150 per campaign but it does take time to build up a customer base & you do have to pay for your brochures & you have to place a min order of £75 before you earn commission. So even though this is a good idea it won't work immediately.

Re the 'friend' who dumps her kids, if you don't like to say no to her make sure you don't answer the door to her, let her think you are out.

If your boss is sacking you shouldn't you be going right away? Or are you begin made redundant if so you can claim JSA right away.
Well i started this job originally as temp to perm it never went perm and my boss is ending my contract of employment on the 26th march.

I hope when the storm settles you find some peace within, change is horriable especially rountine but I am sure you will sort it out one way or another and regain control in your life to bring you happiness!
THanks for you kind words and support!

Kissme that is awful news for you & I wish I was there to give you a hug. I agree that you should go and see your doctor & see what they say. Can I also suggest that you contact this company called CCCS - 0800 138 1111, we contacted them for a similar situation we were in, they give a dedicated counsellor to help with your bills, tell you what you are able to do & also can advise of any benefits you can claim, they are a charity so you will not need to pay them a penny, the relief I felt just sharing the problems with them was immense, they don't judge they just help. Has your boss also put your termination on writing to you? If he has then you should still be able to claim because regardless that you were leaving he has fired you, although that in itself sounds a bit dodgy to me and I would also try to get some advice about that too. Good luck with everything & let us know how you get on.

xx
Thanks hun :)

Kissme, so sorry you have been through all that! Not much I can say really as the others have said it all!! *hugs* xx
Oh hon ((((((hugs))))))

I can't really add more than what other people have already said, except get your CV out there ASAP to try and secure another job - what is it that you do?

I personally wouldn't put my CV online because you end up getting loads of random agencies calling you. It's better to approach agencies yourself (not too many though) and get them to secure work for you.

Definitely get down the Job Centre and get the application started for JSA - as you're losing your job (presuming they're making you redundant, not sacking you :)) you should be entitled to this.

Keep your chin up chuck - you've got a massive support network here and we all want to see you happy. If you weren't happy in your job this could be a blessing in disguise - I've been there and I'm so much happier in the job I'm doing (even though it's only temporary).
Thank you, I'm applying for every job under the sun.... even tho at the end of this month me and my oH can finacially survive once i pay all the bills... i was looking forward to being at home again... but the realisation has hit me and im just having a bit of panic about it.


I just want to say thanks to everyone who commented, gave advice hugs and support!

it feels like i never even left sw!!!

((((((hugs))) to all!!
 
#14
Just wanted to add my support. I've been at the bottom of a black hole in the past, where everything seems totally hopeless, even that everyone would be better off without the burden I'd become.

BUT things DO get better - you've made a good start by sharing how you feel with the rest of us. Do please visit your GP, he presumably knows about your husband's problems, and may well be able to help.

You can't go on looking after your 'friend's' children. Tell her you're not well at the moment (which you clearly are not) and simply cannot cope with them for the time being at least.

Not much help I know, but the sooner you start to put yourself first for once, the sooner things will start to improve, however slowly.

Please keep posting and letting us all know how you're getting on. Although it all seems hopeless at the moment, things will improve. Seek all the help you can.

Very Best Wishes, Roz.
 

Donnie46

Slow but sure....
S: 22st0lb C: 19st7lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 55.1 Loss: 2st7lb(11.36%)
#15
I just want to add my support and to send you some much needed love and hugs.

I shall be thinking of you, and I hope things begin to improve for you very soon, take care now. XX
 
#16
Sorry kissme, I'm so slow posting, that I hadn't seen your recent thread ^, I was still struggling with my VERY slow typing!

So sorry about your parents situation too, which must be an additional worry. But you really do seem to have done a great deal to help yourself, so well done to you. I'm sure that you know that the anti -depressants won't work immediately, but, especially as you were already taking some, they should kick in sooner.

WELL DONE so far, and do keep posting!
 


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