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interesting read

MunchMarie

not so str8 or narrow!!
#1

coley144

Creating my life
#2
Very interesting! I definitely eat emotionally and as a (twisted) form of communication! I am more aware of it these days but sometimes it still slips past me.

I like the bits here about it being instant hunger and craving something unhealthy. I'll try to remember that!

I've been trying the LL thought records when I've been getting hungry (because I know I can't be really hungry!) and they really help when you want to sort out how you feel and calm down - then the hunger goes!
 

MunchMarie

not so str8 or narrow!!
#4
i'm glad its helped - i'm re-reading it again - its a biggie lol
takes my tiny brain a while to take it all in!!
 

MunchMarie

not so str8 or narrow!!
#5
an extract from no 3. anybody fancing exploring this further?


The Second Step: The 12 Types of Emotional Hunger
The second step to stopping food addiction is to become familiar with the 12 types of emotional hunger. The more you can "see" your own reasons to continue your addiction to food, the more clear you will be that there is something you can do about it, even though you will probably need some form of help and guidance to do it well and effectively.

Through my research and practice, I've identified 12 distinct sources of emotional hunger, each driven by a different type of motivation. These different types of emotional hunger are what fuel emotional eating patterns, make you overeat, and until they are handled without food, will keep your food addiction alive. You'll probably recognize some of these motivations easily, while others will seem less applicable to your life. Some of these may not apply to you, which is good. However, battling just one of these can be difficult.

Type 1. Dulling The Pain With The Food Trance.
If you get hungry when you feel angry, depressed, anxious, bored, or lonely, you suffer from Type 1 emotional hunger, and you use food to dull the pain that these emotions cause.

Type 2. Sticks And Stones May Break Your Bones, But Cake Won't Heal What Hurts You.
If you react by getting hungry when others talk down to you, take advantage of you, belittle you or take you for granted, then you suffer from Type 2 emotional hunger. You eat to avoid confrontation.

Type 3. A Full Heart Fills An Empty Belly.
If you crave food when you have tension in your close relationships, you suffer from Type 3 emotional hunger. You eat to avoid feeling the pain of rejection or anger.

Type 4. Hate Yourself, Love Your Munchies.
If you tend to become hypercritical of yourself, if you label yourself "stupid," "lazy," or "a loser," you have Type 4 emotional hunger. You eat to "stuff down" your self-hatred.

Type 5. Secret Desires Have No Calories.
If your hunger gets activated because your intimate relationships don't satisfy some basic need like trust or security, you suffer from Type 5 emotional hunger and you use food to try to fill the gap.

Type 6. Forty Million Big Gulps And The Well Is Still Empty.
If you stuff yourself to make up for the deprivation you experienced as a child, you have Type 6 emotional eating.

Type 7. It's My Pastry, and I'll Eat If I Want To.
If you eat to assert your independence because you don't want anyone telling you what to do, you have Type 7 emotional hunger.

Type 8. I Can't Come To Work Today—I'm Too Fat.
If your appetite kicks in when you're faced with new challenges—if you use food to avoid rising to the test, or to insulate yourself from the fear of failure—you have Type 8 emotional hunger.

Type 9. Aroused by Aromas, Not by the Chef.
If you eat in order to avoid your sexuality—either to stay fat so that nobody desires you or to hide from intimate encounters—you suffer from Type 9 emotional eating.

Type 10. I'll Beat You With this Éclair.
Type 10 emotional eaters stuff themselves to pay back those who have hurt them, often in the distant past. They use their bodies as battlegrounds for working out old resentments.

Type 11. Peter Pan and the Peanut Butter Cookie.
If you eat to make yourself feel carefree, like a child, you have Type 11 emotional hunger. You eat to keep yourself from facing the challenges of growing up.

Type 12. That Stranger In Lycra Wearing Your Face.
If you overeat because you fear getting thin, either consciously or unconsciously, you have Type 12 emotional hunger.

Experience has shown me that you can't treat all of these very different motivations in the same way—each requires a distinct strategy. For instance, if people have talked down to you all your life, you might have become sensitive to that behavior, and your hunger gets triggered whenever someone belittles or patronizes you. You eat to give yourself comfort, to lessen the sting of insult.

First you shut down, and then you eat. Your strategy will involve finding the appropriate behavior to address the grievance directly. On the other hand, if you overeat because you want to avoid sexual intimacy, you have a very different set of motivations, and you'll need to do a different type of work.

I suggest you read over this list several times. Try to think of times that these types of emotional hunger drove you to eat. The more you are familiar with these different types, the easier it will be to recognize them in the future, which means you'll have more control!

Now that you've read this article and thought about it a little, it's time for you to personally evaluate how it applies to your life. Below are some questions and activities that you should answer and do before the next article is posted. Taking these questions and activities seriously will help you get a better understanding of emotional eating.
 

MunchMarie

not so str8 or narrow!!
#8
1. Can you identify a time when you began to seek food for comfort? Yes I was 17. What was happening in your life at the time? I found out a family secret that was quite earth shattering at the time. I very briefly started using recreational drugs and being a bit promiscuous. When I realised that it was making everything worse, impacting on other people, and putting my problems on show to the world I discovered that secretly eating chocolate was much better! I think that it spiralled out of control because it was so secretive - and i didnt get big until much later so no-body knew therefore i didnt have to do anything about it. If you can't remember when you started using food for comfort, try to describe time when this habit intensified or became more severe.
2. How would you feel if you had to give up the habit of eating when upset emotionally? – well there is no ‘if’ for me – I’ve already realised it’s a necessity. Describe what your life might feel like. Its as scary as can be – yesterday I had a bad day. (see blog for details) I was low and knew that food would change my mood round but didn’t want to do it. The problem is I have no other coping mechanism yet so inevitably my mood got even worse. Part of you probably says that you'll be fine, but what does the other part say? What does the part of you that's scared of giving up emotional eating say? I would love to be like someone with no food issues - be able to eat because i'm hungry and eat anything because there is no guilt attatched and to be able to stop eating when i'm full (to even know what it felt like to be full would be a start!) I imagine having control over food to be very liberating but at the moment the thought of a future without my comfort blanket of chinese and chocolate cookies can be terrifying some days to be totally honest
3. What part of your relationship with food are you in denial about? Which part would you rather not know about? How might you get this out in the open to yourself? What would happen if you did this? Erm.. don’t know
4. Which of the 12 types of emotional hunger do you suffer from most? To begin with just 1 and 9. Some 17 years since I discovered the soothing effect of overeating I no longer have 9. Nowadays I would say 1 is the biggie but also sometimes 2, 3, 7 & 10. 10 is a weird one! I can distinctly remember a few years ago my mum saying I needed a gastric bypass and the minute she’d left I had an almighty bingefest all the while thinking ‘this’ll show you’ as if I was punishing her?! And only a couple of weeks ago when kel had quit smoking she called me from her night out and confessed having just had a cig – my first reaction was to eat to pay her back!! Ridiculous! What are some ways you could begin to change your habit of eating when faced with emotional hunger like this? Don’t know but I wish I did – on to lesson 4!
 

coley144

Creating my life
#10
Am back. THAT was a long meeting! LOL.

Now onto the questions - (I feel like I'm learning loads today!)

1. Can you identify a time when you began to seek food for comfort? I cannot remember a time when I didn't! What was happening in your life at the time? BUT it increased when I was 6 and very bad things were happening.

2. How would you feel if you had to give up the habit of eating when upset emotionally? – relieved and scared. Describe what your life might feel like. Very different. I will be angry and upset more often but also more authentic really because there wouldn't be any dulling of emotions with food. So more of a mixed bag but generally better.
Part of you probably says that you'll be fine, but what does the other part say? What does the part of you that's scared of giving up emotional eating say? That I will just become like Animal in the Muppets! LOL I'm gonna change my pic to Animal!

3. What part of your relationship with food are you in denial about? Which part would you rather not know about? How might you get this out in the open to yourself? What would happen if you did this? Funny questions really - what are you denying? Well if you knew then you are not denying it! LOL

4. Which of the 12 types of emotional hunger do you suffer from most?
I really connected with 1,2 and 3. To be honest as I read down I thought 'Oh no! I'm going to have them all!' LOL Luckily not. I do identify with 7 as well. I HATE being told what to do. I hate that society picks on fatties. It does make me want to eat to stick two fingers up BUT I think I have this one under control. I'm planning to dye my hair purple or something to satisfy my inner rebel.

10 I have done but no longer since I sorted a lot of past stuff out.

What are some ways you could begin to change your habit of eating when faced with emotional hunger like this? Using the thought records to work out what I am feeling, what's really behind it and plan strategies for the future.
 

MunchMarie

not so str8 or narrow!!
#11
thanks coley esp for being so honest and open to it. i found it hard but really cathartic. what did you think of it? have you had a look at chapter 4? to be honest i was a bit disappointed but i'm going to read it again because it takes such a long time for things to sink in with me! got to say tho reading it and working thru the exercise has really helped me with aam this week.

Am 3. What part of your relationship with food are you in denial about? Which part would you rather not know about? How might you get this out in the open to yourself? What would happen if you did this? Funny questions really - what are you denying? Well if you knew then you are not denying it! LOL
do you think we are missing something or is it just a stupid question?? lol :D
 
#12
hi girls my answers are on our blog xxx
 

coley144

Creating my life
#13
You know I think the denial bit with me has been denial that I still had a problem. I knew I ate emotionally but I thought by sorting out my head I wouldn't do it anymore.

BUT that's only past crap and new stuff keeps coming doesn't it? So unless you tackle the emtional eating itself (rather than the emotions) its not sorted just dormant until new crap comes along.

So really you need to tackle both - clear out your old baggage and find new techniques to break the cycle of Stress->eating
 
Likes: KD

KD

Gone fishing
#14
BUT that's only past crap and new stuff keeps coming doesn't it? So unless you tackle the emtional eating itself (rather than the emotions) its not sorted just dormant until new crap comes along.
Excellent point!

I think denial was a huge issue for me. Then finding the wrong answers:rolleyes: So for example, if the kids are giving me grief, and thus making me want to eat inappropriately to calm down, I could give the kids away.....and then I wouldn't want to eat inappropriately...yes? Nope.

Because then something else will come along to make me cross.

So I had to find another way to calm down so whenever it happened, I had an alternative set of behaviours.

Kids get to stay...boss doesn't get strangled...and I stay at goal weight :clap:
 

KD

Gone fishing
#15
What part of your relationship with food are you in denial about?
I think we sometimes deny that we eat inappropriately for all sorts of reasons

I was scared of facing it. Feared that I would expose myself to myself. That my cloak of strength and logic would finally be taken from me and I would see my weaknesses. It was easy to hide behind excuses and less work. Change takes effort. Finding answers meant I had to ask myself uncomfortable questions
What would happen if you did this?
This is a really good point. I think we build up an image of things we fear. We make it so huge that we can't face it. Our imaginations run wild. When we face the fear and find solutions, they are often much easier than we imagined.

Not sure that makes sense.
 

Elvira

Mistress of the Dark
#16
I think we sometimes deny that we eat inappropriately for all sorts of reasons

I was scared of facing it. Feared that I would expose myself to myself. That my cloak of strength and logic would finally be taken from me and I would see my weaknesses. It was easy to hide behind excuses and less work. Change takes effort. Finding answers meant I had to ask myself uncomfortable questions
This is a really good point. I think we build up an image of things we fear. We make it so huge that we can't face it. Our imaginations run wild. When we face the fear and find solutions, they are often much easier than we imagined.

Not sure that makes sense.
This is so true! I used to say "But I don't eat that much!". When I look back, it's true. I didn't hardly eat anything but what I did eat was always loaded with fat, carbs or sugar!!! x
 

MunchMarie

not so str8 or narrow!!
#17
Not sure that makes sense.

KD you always make sense :D
in fact i keep meaning to root out that KD appreciation thread that was on here a while ago - i know how much you loved it! :rotflmao::rotflmao::rotflmao::rotflmao:
 


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