long,depressing,confession.

Discussion in 'Lipotrim Forum' started by BlackRose, 12 October 2008 Social URL.

  1. BlackRose

    BlackRose Gold Member

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    I'm only restarting today. I drifted away from minimins because I broke - and I can't even remember what I ate or why I felt so low that I felt I had to eat -I actually can't remember how this slipery slope began! Which is truly saying something because if, whatever it was, was so bad then surely I'd remember it now. It was obviously just my mind, my emotions my hormones -whatever, playing tricks on me I WAS NOT HUNGRY! I WAS NOT BORED!

    I think I've been eating for about ten days now. Tho when I say 'eating' I mean I've been one day LT next day broke -one day LT, next day food -ya get the pattern.So for the past ten days or so I've been in spiral beating myself up because it must just be me. I'm just too weak willed. I'm just too greedy.

    But I have decided not to accept that. I wasn't going to come clean here because ppl kept saying how I encourage others and am always cheery -but thats only because I LOVE minimins, I love all my fellow Lt'ers. And when I'm here I feel I can truly do this. And I truly believe in everyone on this forum. I didn't want to bring ppl down or disappoint.

    But thats counter productive and it means I wont get from the forum what I've become used to. If i lose this forum as an outlet and support network I will actually feel bereft -melodramtic but true.

    So I'm coming clean. I will not accept that I am too weak and too greedy because I know I have it in me to do this. I just know it. I will not cheat myself out of losing this weight -FOR ME!- and I will not give up my minimins out of shame. One day I will post a thread amazed at how i've gone for weeks without eating or cheating and feeling thoroughly pleased with my weight loss.

    The good thing is I dont think I've gained more than a couple of pounds so its not like I'm back at the beginning.

    I can accept that I'm human and will make mistakes and I feel ready to break the one day off one day on cycle. I'm sorry for being bad -and absent -but yiz better get used to BlackRose being around again -I am back and I'm doing it this time -you just watch me go!
     
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  3. Gene Genie

    Gene Genie Mad as cheese

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    WELCOME BACK :):talk017::talk017:
     
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  4. Sheep

    Sheep on the up lol

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    Heya hun , and welcome bk

    first i think there aint no need to be sorry, only to ur self, as its ur body and ur life, but what u wrote ..........====> So I'm coming clean. I will not accept that I am too weak and too greedy because I know I have it in me to do this. I just know it. I will not cheat myself out of losing this weight -FOR ME!- and I will not give up my minimins out of shame. One day I will post a thread amazed at how i've gone for weeks without eating or cheating and feeling thoroughly pleased with my weight loss. ......
    thats the way to move forward just keep reminding ur self why ur doing this is for u only hun, and it will be well worth it when u look bk near the end and think wow i did it, Good luck i know this time around u will do great ;)
     
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  5. aislinn

    aislinn Full Member

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    Welcome back. Don’t beat yourself up to err is human. We aren’t robots and so that’s what makes us, us ……………the beautiful us. Forgive yourself and try again.

    Good luck.
     
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  6. XKay78X

    XKay78X Im gonna do this..;-)

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    :) You go girl x x You shouldnt feel bad, i have to admit ive only been on this a few weeks and it is a hard diet to do. You should feel proud of how you have done so far, its a great achivement, a lot of people must find it hard, i know i do some days. And a lot of people just give up on it. We are all behind you 100%, hugs and kisses, stay strong:hug99: x x
     
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  7. DQ

    DQ Queen of the Damned

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    Dear Black Rose, I think it's really brave of you to post all of that, and I am really glad that you can come to Minimins to get support as well as give it. Big :hug99:
     
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  8. BlackRose

    BlackRose Gold Member

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    Thanks everyone, I'm feeling like I can take on the world now lol.

    BIG HUGS TO EVERYONE!!!!
     
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  9. pizzle84

    pizzle84 I will do this!!!

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    Hey i slipped up last night and kicked myself out of ketosis after being back in it for only a few hours!!! The reason i ate my sons leftover chicken dippers last night..........I DONT HAVE A CLUE!!!! Thats what annoys me the most. AS people have said your only human, dont beat yourself up over it, youv done so well so far :)
     
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  10. Peggie

    Peggie Full Member

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    Really glad to see you're back BlackRose - I was beginning to wonder where you were and was getting a bit concerned that you'd gone off course.

    You sound determined to crack it this time and we're all here for you.

    Plus we've missed your fab posts so go to it woman!

    Peggie xx
     
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  11. mrs bee

    mrs bee doesn't like the rain!

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    well done for coming back and getting back into it again x
     
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  12. BlackRose

    BlackRose Gold Member

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    OMG!!:cry:

    thank you!

    I tell ye I'm back and ready to impress lol
     
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  13. scazman

    scazman Full Member

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  14. liberty_girl

    liberty_girl Peace Love Happiness

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    Welcome back Black Rose xxxx ;):D
     
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  15. moanz

    moanz Full Member

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    Hiya! We're all creatures of routine, Its very hard to change the habits of many yrs, ie eating loadsa carbs lol!
    I'm not very far into this diet, but can completely appreciate how easy it would be to go a bit mad here & there!
    nice to meet you, Simone x
     
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  16. MorbidBubblewrap

    MorbidBubblewrap Is thinking positive!

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  17. tara66

    tara66 Silver Member

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    Welcome back doll, glad to hear your feeling upbeat and raring to go.

    Remember when you feel rubbish you post as well, thats how it works. Its just as much support to people to know that the likes of you who they look to for inspiration and a laugh have struggles as well. It gives us our turn to help.

    You might have to pretend to be ok in the 'real' world but not here.

    Remember you said you started drifting away first, so something was going on there, so keep with us, lots of posts as usual from now on. You can sooo do this if you put yourself first xxx
     
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  19. BlackRose

    BlackRose Gold Member

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  20. BlackRose

    BlackRose Gold Member

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    My god, reading these replies has had me crying and laughing at the same time! Guess whos back, back again lol

    THANKS EVERYONE!! I am back on LT high horse and watching everyone to make sure they dont fall into the same trap as me! You have been warned lol ;) :D
     
  21. CAZ72

    CAZ72 Silver Member

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    Good luck with coming back on....just remember you can do it!!!!! caz x x
     
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  22. fragglerock64

    fragglerock64 Silver Member

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    welcome back Blackrose you have been sorely missed.ypu have acknowledge to yourself you had a blip put it behind you and get back on th LT train.
    all the best
    xx
     
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