Looking forward to being thin?

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by SerenityValley, 31 January 2009 Social URL.

  1. SerenityValley

    SerenityValley Surgically happy.

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    I'm sure everyone is - and I'm sure we're all in various states of beliving we'll get there. I know and believe that I will get there, finally. So I'm thinking about the things I'm looking forward to the most. There are many things, some very personal, so very glib, some very important, some very minor.

    So Ii thought I'd list (in no particular order) 5 of my favourites. Would love to hear other people's too (as many or as few as you want).

    Travelling without major discomfort. It's a wonderful though that I can slip into cattle class on a plane, and not be crippled. That I can sit on a bus, or the metro, without my bum taking up more than my fair share. That I can wander around an airport or train station, without feeling people' eyes on me (rightly or wrongly, I feel both invisible, and stared at by all and sunder). That I won't need to raise the armrest on a train or plane, just to feel comfortable. That I can move around, carry my case, without sweating everywhere.

    Romance, I'm an old romantic really. I haven't had a gf since I was 17, and haven't kissed a girl since the 90's. All part of my social isolation, and my belief that I was worthless. Now I know at 23st 8lbs, I was never going to break any hearts and few women would look at me (I don't mind this - I am sure that part of the reason I got so big, was a self-defense mechanism). But as I approach my goal, I truly hope that I will start to experience all the things I have missed out on. I am even starting to believe that I will at some point meet someone. It's one of my major reasons for losing weight. So for now, I'll look forward just to kissing someone and them wanting it.

    Meeting new people. Largely because it's such a lovely, whimsical thought that I can meet people who will never know that I was ever fat. How amazing, after an entire life as a fat bloke, to be able to meet people as a thin man. I am very excited by that. Of course, I won't hide who I was, because who I was is part of who I am. (I will talk about who I am at another thread soon). I intend having fat pictures on my fridge, on my screensaver, possibly tucked away in my desk at work.

    Sport. I love football - I have only played a few times in 20 years. I am too old for full sized football but I'd love to get a few years of 5-a-side before I'm too old. I'm also intending playing basketball at some point - a sport I haven't played since I was 15 - I was rubbish asanything but it was fun. I'll be able to swim properly again, and I'll take up running. I have it in my mind that I will train and run the great north run this year or next. I haven't run since I was in my teens, unless it was for a bus.

    Confidence. This is something I'll go into further at another time. I grew up and lost all my self-confidence, all my self-esteem, all my hope. In the last 12+ months I have begun a process that has changed my life entirely. I'm gaining confidence all the time. I've made so many friends since i began the process of re-socialising myself. I have three very clsoe friends, and people ranging from close, to acquiantence and am finally developing a knack of making friends. It was hard to accept that people actually liked me and that I don't have to be perfect for everyone. So this year will be my year of confidence, where I do the things I want to do, where I feel happy because I have a right to feel happy.
     
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  3. PurpleButterfly

    PurpleButterfly 16lb to go!

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    :D Andy you're on such a roll and I admire you muchly for that!

    Ok. Mine are:
    Having room to wiggle my butt in a seat. Just like Andy - be it on the bus, or train, or wherever..
    Ok you know when you have to climb over someone? or fit through a gap between chairs. Being able to do that without flattening some poor unsuspecting people.
    Boring I know but the clothes thing; being able to pick out whichever clothes I want rather than the least bad clothes/ones that cover my lumps best. And in normal sizes not having to search for how big the sizes go to.
    And related to that, showing off my body (I'll never be one to go round in a boob tube and mini skirt mind, but I mean with other clothes!) and feeling sexy when I walk down the street!
    Not feeling held back to go on anything like a bungee jump or go scuba diving again or something, because I'm afraid the cord will snap with my weight!
    Last, and probably one of my biggest. Seeing the look on my parents' faces, and my boyfriend's face, when they see me for the first time since this diet and I'm all skinnyfied! (They don't know I'm on this diet!)
     
  4. JazzyB

    JazzyB Full Member

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    Andy, I believe you will do it, but please also believe that you dont need to be thin to have friends, or enjoy life.

    Our own perception of ourselves is so different to others see us anyway. I'm sure you could have got a GF but for the reasons that you gave ie no confidence the choice was made by you. I fell for a guy who was very overweight a long time ago - and to me it mattered not a jot!! It didnt work out between us but that was for very different reasons.
    Don't go missing out any longer! You already have all of us so you have lots of friends and you're looking great so go on -enjoy yourself!!

    As for my five things:
    1, I'd like to be able to feel comfortable and look good in my own skin!
    2, I want to be healthier and cut down all the risks of serious illnesses caused by being obese.
    3, I too would like to not be self concious in a wet suit or feel that I'm always the biggest when I'm somewhere new or doing something new
    4, I'd like to be able to go into any shop and know I could get my size
    5, I'd like to show myself and everyone else that I can do it :D

    PS xxx there's a few kisses to keep you going ;)
     
  5. slendablenda

    slendablenda Gold Member

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    Brave post Andy

    Well done for comnig so far Andy.
    I'm sure you will achieve all those things because you are determined and you have taken control over your life.
    Doing LL is part of your process of coming to terms with life and moving forward isn't it? Ibet you had already decided in your head before starting LL hadn't you?
    Just don't think that being thin is the same as happiness.
    It's part of it and will make the other things much more likely to happen ,but life still gives you knock backs and issues to deal with. I think it's just that the improved confidence will help you overcome them better.
    Well done so far, keep it up and good luck for the future.
    It has been a privilege watching you achieve so much already. xxxxxx
     
  6. Serena A

    Serena A Can't think of a title

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    Another great post Andy! You are doing so well and your positive attitude is an inspiration.

    I am looking forward to my first ever holiday this Easter as a slim person, and not having to shy away from the camera and having to un-tag every facebook photo I'm in.

    I can't wait to see the reactions from those friends/family members who I only get to catch up with every so often.

    I love the fact that abstaining from food has shown me how strong I really am, stronger than I ever thought possible, and I am really looking forward to showing all the doubters that I will not put the weight back on. Yes it will still take strength but I know I will do it.

    xx
     
  7. SerenityValley

    SerenityValley Surgically happy.

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    ooh that's a good one! I need aisle seats whereever I am to ensure I don't have to crawl over people. Yes, I look forward to this!

    Oh I'm sure you're right, that I'd have been able to find a GF at some point - but I do think most women would have been put off by my size, and those who weren't may have been put off by my lack of confidence and experience. I know that lack of confidence is a big turn off. As I say, I don't blame them at all.


    *blushes* Thank you :)

    Oh yes, LL and losing weight is a huge part of my life changes. I actually began the process of change in december 2007 and then in earnest in March 2008. I will talk about this at another time as I need to think about how much I want to share in a public forum.


    Oh no, it's not, definitely. I've been becoiming happy for several months now (I realised yesterday that I am actually happy almost all the time now - it's only on days off if I feel isolated from people that I feel a little less happy).

    Being fat and unhappy is a vicious cycle, where one breeds the other. Now, losing weight and gaining confidence as weight comes off, is a similar, but positive cycle.

    I've been working hard for over a year, to find happiness in everything I do and am and am reaping the rewards from that :)



    I cannot underline this enough. While the weightloss on this woe (way of eating) is easier than traditional methods, we have to learn to gather reserves of strength we didn't know we had, and find ways to cope with things and we all do it - where we would have turned to food, we turn to friends, family, and our new grown determination to get us through them. I have many new coping methods and this will stand me in good stead.

    This year, I had my heart hurt by the same girl twice - I used that pain to drive me forward, where in the past I would have crumbled. The pain lasted a long time, and I still held on, and moved towards my goals :)
     
  8. MrsDannyDyer

    MrsDannyDyer Silver Member

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    Hey Andy

    Your reasons could be mirrored to many ppl on this site. You must feel fantastic, cause you certainly look it. Well done on how far youve come so far, and good luck with the rest. I hope you get everything you want from life xx
     
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