Miserable

Fay737731

Silver Member
After months of doing really well on the diet I haven't been sticking to it as strictly as I should be for the past few weeks. Swapping the step 2 meal for a 1/4 nandos chicken because I really don't want to go home, or skipping the meal completely because I don't want to venture out of my room to the kitchen all because of one flat mate I am really not getting on with since she accused me of "hiding her things" - some might call it cleaning and/or tidying.

We are all moving out in a month so the landlord is giving viewings and on the days when I know people are coming around I do tidy up and put things away. Just like if the flat mate is having guests around she will put our stuff away. She started saying I was cleaning up only her stuff and leaving mine out, I was hiding it because she is always putting our stuff away in places we cant find it. I felt pretty angry about that as I had warned them a few weeks ago about the viewings.

Since we told her we were moving (and therefore she would have to either take over the lease or move - because we are the leaseholders and she is the subletter) it really is as if she is intentionally leaving things really messy for us to clean up.

Back to the main point....all of this is greatly impacting my mood. I have been feeling really miserable about how she has made me not want to go back to my own home. Then there are waves of anger about the same thing. I am really struggling with the diet and this.

I know that others have "REAL" problems and in comparison this is trivial but when you are on the verge of tears it doesn't feel trivial to me.
 
You have done so well. I think most of us have these negative times, and if like me, food is a solution for the immediate problem, not long term, then it's so easy to fall back.
Try to imagine that weight loss is like a train journey from John O'Groats to Lands End. The track has many stops, and we are likely to get off along the way and not progress, but then we do board the train again and continue on. You can do this. :)
 
Hi,
You have done so well but you aren't finished. I know you look much better but there is still room for improvement.
Don't put feelings and excuses get in the way of finishing your journey, you need to get through this without food just like in 'real life' on maintenance. Use this time as good practise on how to manage your emotions with food and the weight loss as an added bonus.
Otherwise this time next year you will be that size 22 again and that isn't really an option is it?

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins
 
to a point a agree with the above but as i ve had a flat mate from hell i can sympathise. she will be leaving more of a mess no doubt but as your the leaseholder s i take it if the flat is in a state she has no deposit to loose? if she does the you have more bargaining power. look as the mess as traveller training! its one month it can be got through, you can t change your flat mate but you can change how you react to it and reduce the stress levels. first off id reclaim my home she knows that you lot disappear when she s around well make your presence more visible. all the considerate behaviour you employ stop. she disrespects you? calmly and quietly put your point across. dont raise your voice (it is so difficult to maintain an aggressive posture when the other party ain t taking the bait)

it will pass and dont let this cheeky middin spoil your good run the nando s stop now!
jx
 
to a point a agree with the above but as i ve had a flat mate from hell i can sympathise. she will be leaving more of a mess no doubt but as your the leaseholder s i take it if the flat is in a state she has no deposit to loose? if she does the you have more bargaining power. look as the mess as traveller training! its one month it can be got through, you can t change your flat mate but you can change how you react to it and reduce the stress levels. first off id reclaim my home she knows that you lot disappear when she s around well make your presence more visible. all the considerate behaviour you employ stop. she disrespects you? calmly and quietly put your point across. dont raise your voice (it is so difficult to maintain an aggressive posture when the other party ain t taking the bait)

it will pass and dont let this cheeky middin spoil your good run the nando s stop now!
jx

Thanks :) This is exactly what my consultant said when I was telling her how upset I have been. She said not to worry about doing step 2 and if i go to SS and SS+ that should be fine, so long as I still have my shakes and water which helps.

Thankfully she does have a deposit to lose as I made sure I had one when she moved in. Anytime I have asked her recently to do something (like clean the blocked sink) she has been really rude and calling me "intolerent" because "it was only the one time", which in actual fact it was at least two weeks of consecutive days of scummy, cold water blocked sinks but Nic and I had been cleaning it. Maybe she is just that oblivious to anything but herself....there were many other occassions but too many to list.

Nic keeps saying to use it as traveller training as well :)

Only three weeks to go and I am free from her!!!!

Would I make it known that her depoisit is at risk with continued behaviour? Tempted to get the cleaners in each morning before the viewings and take the costs out of her deposit.
 
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Hi,
You have done so well but you aren't finished. I know you look much better but there is still room for improvement.
Don't put feelings and excuses get in the way of finishing your journey, you need to get through this without food just like in 'real life' on maintenance. Use this time as good practise on how to manage your emotions with food and the weight loss as an added bonus.
Otherwise this time next year you will be that size 22 again and that isn't really an option is it?

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins

I am greatful for the tough talk but I am not sure I am making excuses that much. I didn't go get a pizza from Dominoes each night, or KFC, an all you can eat buffet or any of the other very bad options. What would you suggest for eating out if you didn't want to (or hypothetiaclly couldn't go home)? I figured the Nandos chicken was the closest thing to a step 2 meal as I could find...? I get discount at our one meaning that it's financially fitting also. But yes, like skydragon said I should make my presence more visible and be in the kitchen and cook as I usually would etc.
 
I got the impression from this post you was struggling with the diet overall. A nandos chicken to avoid going home is hard for me to grasp as I perhaps would have gone to a friends for the evening to have a good moan and knowing it's an ongoing issue have asked my consultant for one of the 'ready meals'
For me, I'm very strict in cambridge and regardless of my other commitments stick to my plans and set out my plan for the week ahead. This is key to my maintenance and can only go on my own experience for now.
I hope it gets sorted for you soon it does sound a very stressful and strained time. X

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins
 
I got the impression from this post you was struggling with the diet overall. A nandos chicken to avoid going home is hard for me to grasp as I perhaps would have gone to a friends for the evening to have a good moan and knowing it's an ongoing issue have asked my consultant for one of the 'ready meals'
For me, I'm very strict in cambridge and regardless of my other commitments stick to my plans and set out my plan for the week ahead. This is key to my maintenance and can only go on my own experience for now.
I hope it gets sorted for you soon it does sound a very stressful and strained time. X

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins

Great idea about the ready meals!!! I will contact my consultant today and ask her if she thinks that's an option!!! Didn't think of that one at all (doh!)

I hadn't spoken to my consultant about how I was feeling at the time of my initial post. I did mention to her last week that I was skipping meals but said it was just related to being busy but after speaking to her further about the real reasons on Tuesday I am feeling much much better. Nandos started on Friday after a particularly bad evening and lasted until Monday evening....not had any since!!

I did what skydragon suggested and just went about my business as usual....cooked 3 days of meals last night. Woke up this morning to find all the pans are "missing". Guess I can't be using their things anymore (even though they have used and been damaging our for the past 18+ months).
 
good show fay

just ignore flat mate its only for a short time and keep on reclaiming the flat. she is just chucking the dummy out!
jxx
 
I had the chichen pasta last night...plan being invoked...

Considering getting a cleaner in before each viewing and charging it to them as I was 20 mins late for work this morning because of how much I had to do before I left (all theirs other than making my bed)...

With them removing all of the pot, pans, plates etc. from the kitchen it is very very hard not to stoop to their level. What they haven't considered is that I pay ALL of the electric, gas, internet....the router is mine, the sky box is mine, the tv is mine....! I'm pretty sure changing the WiFi password would get one big reaction! Trying very hard not to be that person but it's difficult when they bring all the kitchen items out of their room to cook and then take them back again after.
 
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