Need advise about contradicting family members!

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by x89amandax, 5 May 2009 Social URL.

  1. x89amandax

    x89amandax Full Member

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    Hello Everyone.

    Well ive been doing CD for 2 weeks now got my 2nd WI tomorow 7.15pm. I lost 10.5lbs my first week looking to lose a couple tomorrow.

    My issue is my family. Im 20 and live at home with my mum and my dad works away but comes home for few weeks at a time.

    I never used to be overweight until a year ago i went onto the contraceptive pill which made me pile a stone on and before i new it id piled on 2 stones probably a conbination of bad eating habbits, a desk job, and the pill beefing me up.

    My family are quite cruel they should love me whatever size i am but were quick to make some harsh comments on my size and me putting weight on "do you not weigh yourself?" and "did you not realise you were putting it on?" "oh your eating again are you?" type of comments. My nanna said infront of a room full of my family oh youve put weight on havent you grabbing at my stomach... which was soooo mortifying and it hurt so bad.

    When i was 13 i went through a phaze of starving myself and got so skinny size 6 hung off me luckily i got myself out of that one before i ended up with a serious eating disorder but ive always been consious of my weight.

    Finally after my rambling the point im needing advise on is that now ive started CD my family are not being supportive, my dad (whos now away) tried to taunt me with fish and chips and chocolate cake. My mum kept putting chocolate muffins on top of my CD box of my packets. And now theyre making comments that ill lose the weight but theres no point ill only pile it on plus more.. and im like NO I WONT :(

    Now ive done it for 2 weeks my mums now acting like im an anorexic and says I should be eating food not just CD (im on SS) Ive even gave them the booklets to read and they know I go see my CDC and my doctors been informed.

    I just dont know what to do? their taunts just make me wanna do CD more and make me want to prove them wrong which is a good thing its just starting to do my head in they should support me not shot me down.

    Has anyone else had this issue??
     
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  3. tillyfloss

    tillyfloss Gold Member

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    Hi Amanda,
    People can be so cruel sometimes, especially it seems those who should love us most of all......

    I think you can see from what you have read that this diet is sound, you will lose your excess weight and have done fantastic so far....

    I think you just have to say to your family... "I am aware of what I am doing, It is based on scientific fact, and you are really hurting me with your attempts at sabotaging my efforts."

    Sometimes the direct approach delivered when you are calm, makes people understand just how horrid they are being...

    If they won't change, you will just have to be superstrong and ignore them, coming here all the times you need support....

    Congrats on your loss so far... and hugzz

    x
     
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  4. x89amandax

    x89amandax Full Member

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    Thank you :D I just dont wanna have to be secretive and sly about it just to avoid their comments i want to be able to share my losses and not get aload of flack for it but i know ill just have to ignor it luckily ive got a supportive boyfriend who i can discuss it with and obviously you guys on here who are going through the same journey :)
     
  5. curlywurly1234

    curlywurly1234 Cambridge Consultant

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    Hey Amanda.
    Just wanted to say well done as you have done so well.....
    I dont understand why if your doing something that is going to make you healthier and feel better about yourself in the end. Why people are not supportive especially ones close to you.

    There are alot of negative people around especially. when they here you are not "eating" its very disturbing to some the thought of not actually eating...
    Stick with it your doing fab as you say you have your boyfriend who is supportive and you have all of us on here that will support you . Your doing this for you at the end of the day dont let anyone spoil it for you your doing fab.
    Chin up sweetie x
     
  6. airgirl

    airgirl Gold Member

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    Sorry to hear your going through this, i can only echo what the others have said really, but stick with it and don't let their taunting destoy the hard work you've put in.

    Family can be weird at times, if you've discussed with them already how their taunting makes you feel and they are still doing it then there is nothing you can do apart from growing thicker skin!

    I'm sorry thats not very helpful, i just mean if they continue to do you have 2 choices...let them win and give up the diet, or stand your ground, prove your point and stay strong (which is what your doing).

    When your back to your former self they won't have a leg to stand on, but at least you'll be able to be proud of yourself for doing this and show them your not kid anymore and you make your own decisions and take control of your life.

    In the meantime hun rant away to your boyfriend and on here and we'll all get through it together.xx
     
  7. fenix

    fenix Full Member

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    You sound like you are doing really great and you should be so proud of yourself!!!!:)

    I can totally understand your problem with the pill, I have piled on weight with it as well, and working behind a desk all day and my weekend cravings haven't helped the situation at all.

    My family are negative as well, I moved to London five years ago from Australia and last time I went home I got comments like, "so, you have learned to eat", "do they not have scales in London", and whenever I went to eat something at home I was told "be careful, your boyfriend won't want you if you get too fat". The comments hurt, especially when they come from people who should support you, but I guess people like to make fun of what they don't understand. One thing I have learned is that people will always find things to criticise you for, and the best thing you can do is be happy with yourself, I think that is the best defence.

    My CDC - Sally, told me early on, that the more progress you make with the CD, the more you will notice people trying to sabotage you, because it intimidates them that you can become so passionate about doing something good for yourself.

    I'm lucky I have my fiancé who is actually going so far as to do the diet with me. I think if you have one person on your side, you can't fail, not to mention all the people on this forum who are great motivators and supporters! Just keep doing what you are doing, and stay strong, hopefully your family will come around when they see how happy you are.
     
  8. kelsocool

    kelsocool Speaks as she finds

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    seriously, i was a cd hater when my sister started back in october, i was uneducated about it and if the truth be told i revelled in the fact that "she would definately put it all back on" BUT she lost loads (then got pregnant) BUT she still maintains even throughout pregnancy (allowing for baby) My excuses were lack of understanding, jealousy BUT now i have done it i feel fab and it annoys me when people slate the diet :eek: .....People used to tell me how dangerous this diet is etc but my BMI was 40, i had to weigh up what was more dangerous!!!
    I do believe that LCD and low/no carb diets are both not a great way to go about losing weight but for the short amount of time you actually do it,(then back to healthy eating) i cant see that it can do that much damage!!

    ignore them sweetheart, give them the facts and then watch their faces whenn you start strutting around looking as good as the wish they did!!!! x
     
  9. novaX

    novaX Full Member

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    I can totally relate though as from a young age my family seem to think its okay to comment about peoples weight.
    I love my family and I'm sure you love yours but sometimes family just don't consider your feelings...once my granddad said I needed to lose weight in front of all my male cousin and uncles I was like the only girl there..it was so embarrassing as I was only like 13 and my family is really big so it was quiet a few people that went silent after his comment...:mad:
    Anyway just do it for yourself and you should tell your mum to stop with the muffin because that would really pee me off...when people do stuff like that just remind yourself why your doing it..:D
    Goodluck
     
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  10. novaX

    novaX Full Member

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    This is sooo true every time I lose weight and people really start to act strange...I think it really does intimidate people that your going off alone and doing something for yourself.
     
  11. x89amandax

    x89amandax Full Member

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    Thanks for all your posts theyve really helped! Im going to do it Im proud ive done 14 days 100% now and to be honest its flown by so far and i carnt believe ive stuck to it. On Weightwatchers where you can eat basically what you like aslong as your within points i couldnt hack and caved in, and on CD SS im limited to my 3 a day but still have stuck 100% it seems crazy but im so happy so far Im just gunna grow thicker skin and ignor it and ill have the last laugh when im down to 9st 7lbs (argh seems so far away) :)
     
  12. toller-girl

    toller-girl constantly confused

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    I think you're doing so well amid that temptation!

    This is perfect practice for you, if you can put up with them at this point, you can do anything and every single thing they say or do makes you that little bit more determined to keep it off.

    Because you don't have much to lose, you could consider going on SS+ or the 810, just so your family can see you eating something and not panic.

    I'm sure they're just doing it because they care, not that that makes you feel any better.

    You can use the determined emotion you get for a bit of NLP (neuro linguistic programming) where you can anchor a feeling and bring it back when you need it. Every time you feel that surge of 'I'll bloomin show you', squeeze your thumb as you're feeling it. After you've done that a bunch of times, you'll be able to draw on that feeling when you're in danger of slipping. If it's 6 months down the line, you've done really well and you find yourself outside a cake shop, you'd just need to squeeze your thumb and those feelings would come flooding back, and help you resist temptation.

    You can definitely do this, SO many people wouldn't have been able to put up with what they've been doing! Regardless of their behaviour, you should be really proud of yourself :D
     
  13. discojen

    discojen Full Member

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    You go girl!
    And next time she does it, put her fr***ing muffin in the bin!

    x x x
     
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