Isn't it strange how a night out can fill you with horror its not the drink its not the food its ME. I am not even close to target I have 50 odd pounds to go but my dress size at the moment is a 16-18 so I can't use the I don't have anything to wear excuse.. I used to love going out until my size got out of hand and I hid away for years.. I have a real complex about people looking at me! It drives my Mum mad, she tells me off for scowling and say's they might be looking at you because you look nice I get ready and I think oh that's ok, then the door bell rings and my friends arrive and my heart sinks.. they all look so fab.. and I go back to feeling awful, I suppose you could ask why I'm even bothering to go out.. well I love my friends and I'm blessed to have them.. just one thing though.. they have got wise to my antics and said if I don't go out tomorrow they are coming around.. it's been six months since my last outing.. god gawd why do I find the social thing so stressful..