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No Support from Family

xx Cathy xx

Bye Bye Huge Bottom!
#1
Does anyone else have this problem?

My family cant seem to grasp the fact that I REALLY REALLY want to be slim and look normal! Its my wedding in just under 11 weeks and all I want is to look nice in my dress for my husband rather than bits overflowing everywhere. I've always been fat from day one and most of my family is.... Mainly cos none of them know healthy food when they see it!

I said to my mum i'd love to get to 11st before the wedding and shes sat there saying no and shaking her head, she says thats too much and I should stop where I am (12st7lb with bingo wings and a huge a55), and tonight I went to my grandparents (haven't seen them in a couple of weeks so hoped to get good response in difference) but my grandad who is the one who supports me in everything I do says I'm not meant to be thin, I'm meant to be big and I always have! My nan chips in everytime I'm not feeling 100% that its time I started eating food. Not the case, I have underactive thyroid (and so does she!) and with it i'm prone to coldness, tiredness, dizziness without being on LT.

Sorry for the rant guys I've just got in and really needed to get it out. Seems like the only one who thinks I can do it is me and my bf.
 
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nictastic

Says it as it is!!!
#2
Hunni...negativity is everywhere ...IGNORE IT or use it to make you more DETERMIND....Sod em!!!!
 
#3
hey hun, there have been other threads along the same lines asking why people are not supportive and say negative things to us dieters. Truth is hun its not up to them. You do whats right for you, only you knows how you feel. If they are concerned about your health, then point out it is better for you not to be overweight. And that these type of diets contain evrything you need. Be positive hun and aim for your goal, get the support you need from us :) and in time Im sure your family will come round to support you too. :)
 
#4
then you and your bf do whats right, we all also stand by you x
 

debz32

Gold Member
#5
Does anyone else have this problem?

My family cant seem to grasp the fact that I REALLY REALLY want to be slim and look normal! Its my wedding in just under 11 weeks and all I want is to look nice in my dress for my husband rather than bits overflowing everywhere. I've always been fat from day one and most of my family is.... Mainly cos none of them know healthy food when they see it!

I said to my mum i'd love to get to 11st before the wedding and shes sat there saying no and shaking her head, she says thats too much and I should stop where I am (12st7lb with bingo wings and a huge a55), and tonight I went to my grandparents (haven't seen them in a couple of weeks so hoped to get good response in difference) but my grandad who is the one who supports me in everything I do says I'm not meant to be thin, I'm meant to be big and I always have! My nan chips in everytime I'm not feeling 100% that its time I started eating food. Not the case, I have underactive thyroid (and so does she!) and with it i'm prone to coldness, tiredness, dizziness without being on LT.

Sorry for the rant guys I've just got in and really needed to get it out. Seems like the only one who thinks I can do it is me and my bf.
IGNORE THEM !!! you should do what is right for YOU.....endof :)

well done for getting started - 11 weeks will make a huge difference to how you look...and (more importantly) how you FEEL about yourself....GO FOR IT !! you've got nothin to lose but the weight !

good luck...and keep us posted :)

love

Debz xx
 
Last edited:

Eclipse

Gold Member
#6
Oh hun I really feel for you - I had the same response when I first started, was told I was too big framed and it wouldn't suit me. But hey, I carried on and I was recently told by my doctor that I had a "small" frame and that the weight I was, was totally acceptable for my frame, build and height! I am 5' 8"!!! So don't listen to them, listen to your body and do what YOU think is right and make sure YOU feel good about yourself on your wedding day x x x
 

xx Cathy xx

Bye Bye Huge Bottom!
#7
Thanks guys, you can always rely on support from everyone on here thats why i love this forum so much.
 

2hourglass

Silver Member
#8
As everyone has said, you must go with your own gut feeling and if you want to look the best you possibly can for your special day then you should be 'allowed' to without negitivity. I have been a wedding florist for many years and have come accross brides who have said when they looked back at the pictures, all they could see was their back fat or chubby arms - so I say go for it - be who you want to be - lets face it you are the star attraction (and the flowers too of course !!!)
 

scousemouse0151

soon to be minnie mouse
#9
hi cathy don't listen to negativity, only you know what's going to make you happy in the future and if it's being thinner and your BF is behind you then you've already got your answer. good luck on your journey and keep us posted on your future weightloss.
 

Sara4

Gold Member
#10
Listen I think everyones family is the same. I have stopped going over to my mothers because I am so sick of it. She nags me to lose weight and then when I do she nags me that it is too much too quick!!! Get to where you want to be and stuff them. It is your wedding day!
 
#11
Hi Cathy,

Maybe your family want you to fail because they are big as well and if you succeed then they will see that they can't hide behind the "we are meant to be big" argument.

Sorry if you think I am speaking out of turn but I don't mean to. You wedding day is supposed to be the best day of your life and you should be able to enjoy it without worrying what you look like.

Good luck and hang in there. If necessary don't see them as often - I don't see as much of my mum coz all she does is nag and go on about how slim my sisters are!!!!!

In 11 weeks you'll easily lose that stone and a half - even if you only lose 2 lb a week. You can do it!
 

KD

Gone fishing
#13
Yep, don't take it to heart. I think people have different expectations. I know that when I was dieting, people were expecting my goal to be a slimmer but still overweight person. I had been tagged always to be fat.

They just couldn't visualize me as slim.

It's worth working out a few phrases to use whenever it happens, rather than get upset.

I used:

"I just want to be healthy...that's okay isn't it"

"Well...I still weigh more than you, so do you think you are underweight?" :D

Oh..and

"I want to be normal, have a normal lifestyle and body. It's not too much to ask, and I'm working darn hard at getting it. Hopefully, I'll live longer too ;)"

As for the underactive thyroid. I assume that you have been tested for this? If so, you should be on medication for it...hence not being underactive anymore??
 

xx Cathy xx

Bye Bye Huge Bottom!
#14
Yep, don't take it to heart. I think people have different expectations. I know that when I was dieting, people were expecting my goal to be a slimmer but still overweight person. I had been tagged always to be fat.

They just couldn't visualize me as slim.

It's worth working out a few phrases to use whenever it happens, rather than get upset.

I used:

"I just want to be healthy...that's okay isn't it"

"Well...I still weigh more than you, so do you think you are underweight?" :D

Oh..and

"I want to be normal, have a normal lifestyle and body. It's not too much to ask, and I'm working darn hard at getting it. Hopefully, I'll live longer too ;)"

As for the underactive thyroid. I assume that you have been tested for this? If so, you should be on medication for it...hence not being underactive anymore??
Yeah i'm on meds but still in the "checking up" dosage stage as i've only been taking them since Jan. But even though i'm on the tablets it doesn't get rid of all the symptoms. Its a huge difference from how I felt before (imagine how dead you feel with flu, aches coldness tiredness etc plus depression and excessive weight gain 24/7) so feeling cold and sleeping more than most people is small price compared with the full whammy.

Thanks for the quotes I'll try them. Was going to go with "just cos i'll be the only slim one in the family" but thats a bit harsh lol
 

nictastic

Says it as it is!!!
#15
Thanks for the quotes I'll try them. Was going to go with "just cos i'll be the only slim one in the family" but thats a bit harsh lol
Ha ha ha i dont think its more harsh than what they have been saying!!!
 

xx Cathy xx

Bye Bye Huge Bottom!
#16
hehe may keep that one in reserve then.... love the before and after pics by the way nic, you're lookin fab. I haven't had a recent photo yet, may take one tomorrow and put on with my 15st one.
 

nictastic

Says it as it is!!!
#18
hehe may keep that one in reserve then.... love the before and after pics by the way nic, you're lookin fab. I haven't had a recent photo yet, may take one tomorrow and put on with my 15st one.
Thanks hun ...not there yet but fingers crossed another month and i will have neailed it!
Yeah, you should definately get some pics on...it amazing how you see it when they are side by side!!!
 
#19
Ha ha ha i dont think its more harsh than what they have been saying!!!
That is not harsh, you go for it, yesterday I was out watching the football when a certain dick walked in and tapped me on the belly as he always did.....prick! And walked away with his tail between his legs and looking embarrassed but I couldn't resist shouting across the bar that I have some triple XL t shirts in the car if he wants them, but on second thoughts they might be a bit tight for him. The place fell about laughing and he didn't stay long..... 'Revenge is a dish best served cold' !
 

scousemouse0151

soon to be minnie mouse
#20
lol nice one gaz you told him.Good god just noticed your 100lb loss,wow i didn't realise. super well done you babe
 


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