oohhh me n hubby want a baby and was counting on him getting a good payrise this year as hes on the lowest payscale so hes been expecteing a gooden and yesteday he got the news and its crap..... we cant afford a baby : cry:
Can I be honest...?
It's never a good time to have a baby, there are always other things to spend your money on and holidays to take etc, but I've had two - they are 6 and 3 now, and although both myself and OH are on decent salaries - it has been a stretch. We have only had 1 holiday abroad in the last 6 years, and will be camping for most of this summer in England as well.
Money cannot make up for the love that you will get from your little bundle (s) and you only need to spend as much as you can afford, afterall who needs to be clothed in designer gear when all they do is sick and poo all over it...
ahhh i know peeps but we surely need to be able to cover our bills, food and petrol when im only bringing in 3 days a week of money plus his full time?? ive looked at absolutley evrything and we cannot cut back on a thing!! we dont splash out on anything (u may notice iom going to the maldives but inlaws are paying) we just dont really spend anything... booohhooo...... hubbys gonna look for another job...
Im pregnant, and it unerves me when people say they cant have them cos of money.. it wasnt planned.. but i know that some how we'll manage.. sometimes its about give n take.. you know.. of course your life won't stay exactly the same and you'll hav to give some stuff up.. x
Tracie... just do it hon have a beautiful lovely babe and sod it, you will find a way people always do, there is always help and there is always a solution money does not make the world go round and things will get better and oppertunities always present themselves don't put off while your young and healthy. So you won't be loaded or have any spare cash you will have the most important thing in the world. just my opinion hon but anything could happen today or tomorrow and no time is ever right, am sending you a big hug anyways (((()))) and hoping you do what you think is best
Having children is only as expensive as you want to make it!!! I had 2 children whilst my husband was at uni...you will get child tax credit and working tax credit help with child care and you family allows. Just go for it. x
Tracie there's never a right time! There could always be a bit more money, a different time of year, a bit more weight to lose first, get a couple of events out of the way...whatever.
I am mega-broody at the moment and can't wait to start a family but OH and I have agreed a plan, which involves having a great, busy summer and trying in the Autumn (he needs the time to get his head round the baby thing!!). We don't have much money, but we will cope, because we want a family.
Your hubby's job thing must be such a disappointment, but look on the positive side hun...a baby will be a fantastic thing for you and you will manage...people do!!
At the risk of being the only person to be wary....I would say - only YOU know your personal circumstances with regards to money....if you manage you bills ok now then you probably would manage to afford a child...you just do....there isn't anything specific you cut back on - you just cope.....
BUT......and I don't wish to offend or appear rude....if you have a lot of money worries and only just afford them each month...then definately don't add to the problem by having a baby....babies are stressful enough at the best of times but can add to arguments over money problems.....I'm not saying you have billions of pounds worth of credit card debts etc or anything like that I'm just saying that you know your limitations financially and only you and you oh can decide if you can afford to feed another mouth.....
(hope that has come out right and not offensively!!)
Just one more thought (but not one to rely on!!!)....you don't know how long it will take to concieve a child. It took us 1 year to conceive my first..plus the 9 months of pregnancy....who knows where you might be financially in 1 3/4 years time.
after having a play on www.entitledto.com (which is perfect timing as april begins a new financial year and tax credits work on that - plus you may get help towards childcare) have a look at www.moneysavingexpert.com where you will find plenty of people in the same/worse situation to yourself.
I do have a lot of debt (around 30k) but i have 3 children and have just given up my full time job as a trainee probation officer to teach some part time hrs swimming.
I would say go for it. You will cope! Yes babies cause stress but if you aren't arguing about money you will find something else to argue about lol - it is the tiredness
which is why I stated don't rely on it! A lot can happen in even 9 months. You could be financially secure at the start and lose your job half way through. You could get a promotion half way through as well.
Just saying dont' base your whole decision on your current financial position. Things can change.
When I found out I was pregnant I was single after having just split with my ex, living in a small 1 bed flat, but I did have a fairly good job but also some debt. I considered a termination as I couldn't see how I could possibly afford to raise a child alone. But I was 30 and I had no excuse for needing an abortion as I saw it for my own principles and morals, but what's more I wanted my baby.
Now here I am with a fantastic guy and a nearly 7 yr old daughter and we're planning on adding to the family in a few months. There have been times where I wept into my pillow, I won't lie to you. But I wouldn't change a thing for the world. Money ws never my biggest issue, even though I was skint nd paying off debts. My biggest problem was trying to be mother and father in the early days and wanting a partner to share it all with.
It may seem impossible now, but believe me, you'll find a way....we always do.
I had fertility problems and was told I should have kids sooner rather than later. We bought and sold houses, progressed our careers and only really tried to have children when I was 32, we then had dreadful problems and our children didnt come by the usual route. I dont regret how I did it but if i had my time again I would def had them a bit younger!
ahhh guys you have helped sooo much, i welled up a bit!! your right.. i think we should just go for it x i wana write more but my lunch is over now, will report back tomoro!! xx thanx guys your always sooo much help!! xxx