Other people's reactions?

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Spanglymum, 8 February 2011 Social URL.

  1. Spanglymum

    Spanglymum Gold Member

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    I'm not sure if it's just because I'm more assertive since I lost weight, but I'm noticing more and more that people are treating me differently. It makes me a bit sad to think that my size could have such a big influence on people (even though lots of people have been lovely and said they never thought I was that big to start with). I'm interested to know what your experience has been. Have people treated you any differently since you lost weight?

    (Oh and realising I've been being "checked out" by random blokes in the office has been an unexpected novelty!! :eek:)
     
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  3. Lynn_

    Lynn_ On A Mission!

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    People respond to personality, whatever size you are. Being fat makes us more withdrawn into ourselves and less likely to come over as sociable maybe. When we lose weight we gain more confidence in ourselves and are not so afraid to step forward, so people respond to that.

    So, I think its a combination effect really, its as much to do with how we feel about ourselves that makes people react differently.

    Nice to be checked out though :)
     
  4. ANONSLIMMER

    ANONSLIMMER Member

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    i just came back from a regular beauty appt.

    the dermatologist is a man

    he was shocked when i walked through the door as she has not seen me since i lost 10 stones

    we always got on very well

    he commented that i had lost weight

    asked me how much

    then he said oh just buzz off at the end of the appt

    i am hurt!!

    in my experience people have judged you and because of their small mindedness wholeheartedly believe you are a failure and wil never have the courage or determination to change

    it highlights their own failures about their physicality and their own mental/emotional state

    sad sad people

    i would have been so pleased for him if it was he that had lost weight

    but it isnt p[raise i am after from others

    im doing this for me
     
  5. ANONSLIMMER

    ANONSLIMMER Member

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  6. yummymummy75

    yummymummy75 Silver Member

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    i'm quite annoyed this week,,was out sat night and got hassle all night from a girl i was in the company of about my weight,,i've lost 2 stones since i last saw her,was told i didnt need to lose that much was fine as i was..i told her i'm half stone away from target she said it was beyond a joke,why cant i just be happy as i am,i said i am happy but i want to feel good too_Oh you've such a little face now it doesn't suit you at all,, as soon as you stop ww it will all do back on,,go feck off i felt like saying!!then met my neighbour yesterday and she said oh you've such a small face it's teeny tiny,,i'm standing there smiling and laughing but came in home crying,,i wish people would just stop passing comments!!!
     
  7. Pink!

    Pink! Silver Member

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    It's sad that people can't just be happy for you, but I suppose when you're doing/feeling so much better it highlights their own deficiencies.
    Oh well, as long as you're happy in yourself it doesn't matter, find new freinds who can appreciate you for who you are.
     
  8. kagome75

    kagome75 WWer

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    I have lost over 80 lbs and every time I meet a friend who hasn't seen me in a while I always hear them telling me as soon as they see me "OMG you've lost so much weight! You look great" then they add "don't lose more or you'll disappear" another comment a friend of mine recently made was telling my DF "I was about to tell you off for not feeding her" LOL
     
  9. Jim

    Jim Big Boy

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    I can't say I have noticed any difference, but I suspect that's because I'm male.
     
  10. Ria.

    Ria. Silver Member

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    i havent noticed being treated differently but I did have the weird feeling of 3 different guys giving me the 'come on' last night :)
     
  11. Jim

    Jim Big Boy

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    There you go then Ria :D
     
  12. Hamu

    Hamu Member

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    That's really true this is one of the reasons well the whole reason I want to lose weight so I can feel better about myself!
     
  13. fable

    fable Full Member

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    I've been saying for last few years i was going tolose weight but it never happened them last June in my sister back garden and as i was eating a burger her neighbour who i used to work with embarrassed me in front of family and friends saying how thin i used to be and had let myself go i cried when i got home and from that day decided they're not friends etc i saw her last week at my niece birthday party gone from i size twenty now around a twelve she said i looked great but i needed to do some thing about my middle some people out there just need to put you down to make them shelves look better all i think at least if she picking on me she leaving some one else alone
     
  14. Pink!

    Pink! Silver Member

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    Go you!
     
  15. Downtown

    Downtown Full Member

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    Weight and image are such huge influences in the media and we're all testament to being able to use that media for the better here on Minimins. However, many people don't have the support forums and I think people form opinions and when they can't air their feelings or opinions they often use crass and unhelpful remarks.
    My confession - I bumped in to a old college friend at a Christening many years ago, the last time I'd seen him he was the picture of health, so I was a little shocked to see he was even bigger than me when we met again. I still feel terrible to this day, but after the Christening had finished and when a group of us got together to catch up, the first thing I said in front of all was 'you've piled on the pounds mate!'

    I've since met him again and apologised, he was kind and said it was just a bit of blokes banter. It still bothers me that I embarrassed him and want to offer an open apology.
     
  16. The Kid Henry

    The Kid Henry Full Member

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    I've noticed I get treated a lot differently now i've lost the weight. I'm a 25 year old bloke for the record!

    I lost 7 stone, but 6 of that was in a period of 8 months.

    I'm way more sociable than I used to be, I never wanted any attention when I was fat because it would mean people looking at me and I was always conscious that i'd be all fat and sweaty - Although I never realised this until after I lost the weight! So my close friends have noticed a massive change in me, i'm constantly flitting around rooms at parties talking to as many people as possible!

    I talk to way more women than previous, just because of the added confidence. I never really had any female friends previously, now I can consider a good 3 or 4 women as good friends!

    I've found women to be very nice about the weight loss, and genuinely interested in talking about it. It's weird with my male friends though. They've got to try and find other ways of taking the mick now! Their main point is that I spend too much time around women and pander to them all the time (not in a lothario kind of way, more a friend of women!). I take it all as a compliment though!
     
  17. Kat1e

    Kat1e This is for life

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    This is an interesting thread. The main reaction i got after losing five stone and then meeting people i used to work with is "you look so fit and healthy - younger!". Frankly i think they were politely saying - gosh you are not that fat women we knew!
    I also think that because i am still curvy (read over 25 bmi ;) ) i'm not getting too many comments about being too thin - except from my mum:D

    As long as you are feeling good - stick to your guns!
     
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  19. mom2two

    mom2two Member

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    I've noticed that people don't like to say anything when you are in the process of losing weight. Like they are scared they will offend you. I had lost 30 pounds going from 190 to 160 (from a 16 to a 10/12) and not one single person said a word! Not...good job...not Wow...not..have you lost weight...NOTHING! The only person, of course, my husband and BFF. Not another soul.
     
  20. sally4119

    sally4119 New Member

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    Most people have mentioned my weight loss, but some never ever mention it despite being there when I've been asked about it!!
    Mind you, these are the same people who never notice you've had your hair done or just come back from holiday!

    Sally xx
     
  21. mom2two

    mom2two Member

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    Very true Sally! Congrats on the 68.5 pound loss!! Way to go :)
     
  22. Jim

    Jim Big Boy

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    Men I take it :D
     
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