please someone help me!

[cherrygem]

hi, this is not my first attempt at LT 100% its proabably my 11th time and the longest i've lasted is two weeks, i get GREAT weight loss results in the first week 14lbs plus losses!i get lots of energy after the first four days and i desperately want to lose weight and fit back into my clothes and start going back out again! when i first started LT nearly four years ago i was my heaviest at 15stone but now i'm 19stone
i'm so unfit i cant walk far or up the stairs, i am starting to get these horrible lumps on the inside of my thighs that are hurting so badly and its all down to my size! i'm only 5'4ft and 27


the problem is i ALWAYS sabatoage myself even though i know i shouldnt and even while i'm doing it i'm crying cause i know its not what i want.

last night i went to bed with a self help cd on repeat to help with starting LT today, i stayed in bed till nearly 3pm so i wouldnt have to think about food, my partner locked all the doors to the kitchen and yet i rang him and texted him abuse about where the key is, i used the back of a spoon to unscrew the handles and still couldnt get in, i tried banging into the door to break it, then i rememmbered some Christmas presents were upstairs that could be eaten so i ate them and den i nearly vomitted and once i recovered i scrabbled to find money to order a take away, it was GROSS so i threw it into the fire so i couldnt eat it, and guess what while it was burnning away i nearly put my hand into the fire to scoop soe of the food out!!!!!!!

i'm sick arent i??? you all think i should be locked away in a padded cell?????????????????

i'm not a happy fat person, i'm so confident and outgoing when i'm slim and yet i wont let myself diet.
i've spent thousands on fancy gyms and other diets but stop after two weeks three at most!

i've had LOADS of support on this site before so i feel ashamed and guilty for asking for help on this site again?

i am in counselling so please dont suggest counselling.

has anyone been like me and finally lost the weight???

i really dont know what esle to do

thanks for reading!!!xxx​

 

[totes.lipo]

welcome back cherrygem. i understand how u feel comepletely. if i think u need to be locked away in a padded cell then im afraid id certainly need to be in there with u. while ive never been locked out of the kitchen i can totally relate to the feeling towards food and absolutely having to eat no matter what. sometimes i just have a little panic attack if i cant eat something. i even feel like vomitting if i cant eat something quick enough. its so weird. i consider myself addicted to food psychologically. it numbs everything for me and i feel good in the moment. i feel actual relief. u know when u are bursting to pee and cant find a toilet, eventually u get to and the relief is just great? ya, thats how i am with food.... lol! not so funny anymore now that im near 27st though. my knees and feet just hurt so much. its not worth it.. the pay off im getting from food isnt balancing out with the physical and mental pain anymore and i just had to make tht choice. to stop. to get help. to live.
im here with a massive amount to lose. it can be done. and u can do it. log in here as often as u can for support and advice and of course motivation. everyone here is so friendly and more than willing to help u get a step up on the ladder. perfect strangers reaching our a hand of support when u badly need it. everyone is doing so well too.
dont wrry cherry, u can really do this. take it one step at a time. an hour at a time if u must.
with u al the way and well done on giving it another shot. as i always think, at least i never give up!! same for u! no lost causes here.
have u started yet? im just on day 5 now but im grand.
very best of luck keep using those cds if they help any bit at all. use all resources available to u
xxx

 

[cherrygem]

hi Ali, i burst into tears reading your post, i'm not a freak!!! i get so depented on food, it wasnt that i was hungry it was the fact i couldnt get into the kitchen in case i needed food and den desperation and fear like a really bad panic invaded me. i like drinking the water and dont find the choc shakes hot bad, its just the crutch of food, the feeling it gives me, the love it shows me and it never rejects me! but then its like a really bad one night stand and its sti is obesity!!!

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

Cherry i was 19 stone before and also would have gone through anything for food, i was purely depressed thinking it would make me feel better yet it made me feel worse and i ended up even more depressed. I am putting one of my kids to bed now so haven;t time to reply but i will be back shortly.

Go look at my other post. In 2008 i was 19 stone and went to under 10 stone. If i can do it anyone can. I am back again now after having kids close together and piling on the pounds. I kept it off until pregnancy. You live near to me if you are in KK. I wll be back when i have my 2 year old asleep.

 

[cherrygem]

cant wait! and thanks

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

The brat is now in bed

Cherry you can do this. I am struggling to get past Day 1. Tomorrow is Day 1 again for me tomorrow. I am struggling and i don't know why. I will get there hopefully tomorrow.
You are getting to 2 weeks. That is FANTASTIC. Once you get passed the third week in my experience it is plain sailing. You won't be hungry. You will be in ketosis. You will be seeing the results. Please give yourself the opportunity to reach you full ability. You can do this. Imagine in your head what you want to look like. Imagine how much easier it is to get around. Imagine how much happier all other aspects of your life would be without the thinking all the time of your weight at the back of your mind. Because that's how it is for me. I was back up to over 18 stone last week. I was 16 stone having my second daughter the day she was delivered. So as you can see, i have gone mad. I was on lipotrim for 6 weeks and was down to 12 stone and my father died and boom. I went mad.
But i don't want to be fat anymore. I don't want to waste my 30's. I managed to lose the weight when i was 28, it was the happiest time of my life. I stayed in bed the first week because i could, i hadn't kids or a partner. I would love to hide out in bed now but i can't. I have to cook for my partner and kids.
This is my last time doing this journey. I like you need to focus. Need to get through the first DAY. I am brutal. I need to get through the first day and stop making excuses.
Do it with me.
I live close to you. I am on the KK/Wford border.

 

[cherrygem]

i'm going to re-try doing day one again tommorrow too! i'm on the tipp/waterford/kk border but i'm most defintely a kk girl

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

***** i think we are from the same town lol. I'm from the same borders but most definitely a waterford girl
I am day 1 again tomorrow also. We will do this.

 

[cherrygem]

oh beep we probably know each other!:d'oh:

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

I doubt it. I have been in hibernation for 3 years lol.
What harm if we do. We should make a pact that we WILL get to goal and rock our frocks in the disco.
Are you on for us both doing this 100% tomorrow. Post here if struggling. If either of us feel like eating, and we aren;t hungry it is habit and boredom, we post here instead.

 

[cherrygem]

you are my guardian angel

 

[cherrygem]

how long did it take you to lose it last time and how much were you drinking? i feel really buzzed now

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

I lost over 9 stone but it only took a few months. I lost 6 of it through the gym and watching what i ate. On lipotrim i went from just under 13.5 stone to 9.10 in 7 weeks.
If we could stick to lipotrim we would have 3 stone at least gone in the two months. Imagine we would be able to say well we are down to 16 stone or whatever and then it doesn't seem so bad to 12 stone does it?

That's the only good thing, when our weights are high we lose faster.
I did lipotrim last february until the middle of march. I went from 17 stone to 13 stone.
It comes off fast.
We just need to get through the first day and then the first week, and by week 3 we would be well and truly on our way.

I always drank 3-4 litres of water.

 

[cherrygem]

oh my gosh you are such an inspiration!!! i turn 28 on the 3rd of march so that will be my mini goal xxx

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

I am 33 in June :cry:
WHEN we start tomorrow then we should have something like this going on all my previous times
WEEK 1 - 12lbs, WEEK 2 - 6lbs, WEEK 3 - 3lbs, WEEK 4 - 3.5lbs, WEEK 5 - 4lbs, WEEK 6 - 3.5lbs, WEEK 7 - 3lbs. WEEK 8 - 3lbs. That brings us to the 5th March.,

So what WILL we have lost approximately?

38lbs. That's almost 3 stone. (and personally i think we'd have lost more)

You'd have said goodbye to the 18 stones, 17 stones, and just have said goodbye to the 16 stones. You WILL be in and around 15 stone 13lbs. ??

How bad would that be?

We wouldn't have far then to say goodbye to the 15's, 14's et.

Basically after the first 3 weeks you say goodbye to whatever stone you are in every 3 weeks.
Doesn't sound too bad does it?

Why should we be left behind while everyone else is getting to target. Why should we be stopping ourselves. If you are like me i was here last year, not even as heavy and planning to be hitting target. I didn't. Do i want to be here again next year up another 2 stone and still be getting nowhere. No i certainly don't.

No one is stopping us but us. We are sabbotaging it ourselves. We need to stop. We deserve to be happy in our own skin. We deserve to be able to go into penneys and pick up cheap clothes in proper sizes that don't cost a fortune but look like a million dollars. Not Evans paying a fortune and still looking rubbish. That's how it feels.

We should do this for ourselves.

I want to try and conceive again but i can't at this weight. I want to get married but i will NOT at this weight.

Are you putting your life on hold like me? Lets stop it.

 

[cherrygem]

omg! is it too soon to say i love you???? you are totally like me about the penneys/evans thing! i'm seriously up for this now!

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

Good. So am I. We have to do this. We have no choice. If we don;t we are going to hit 20 stone this time next year.
We will enjoy seeing the results. We will enjoy burning the fat clothes.
We will enjoy it all if we give ourselves 3 weeks to get into and start seeing the results on our bodies and scales.

 

[cherrygem]

when in june is your bday?

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

The middle of June. I have a dress in mind i want to wear that very weekend. I am going to make sure i get into it

 

[LetMeFadeAway]

This one.