Struggling on the quiet -an update

Discussion in 'Bring your Head Inside and your Body will Follow' started by vanda, 26 February 2010 Social URL.

  1. vanda

    vanda plodding away

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    Hi all

    Just feeling so low I wanted to get it all out so sorry for the miserable post:cry:

    I lost my mum last November and have put on 3 stone since then. I am struggling to get back on track and have been faffing around between dieting and bingeing.

    Today my self esteem is rock bottom, I have been out to get some new make up in an attempt to make me feel better and although it has done am in tears just writing this. I miss my mum so much and feel so alone.

    I know it is normal to get days like this after losing someone you love, but it doesnt make it any easier to deal with. My partner lives 150 miles away and I find it difficult to talk to people about my feelings so am venting here. Am also at that difficult age with my own central heating and emotional times too.:eek:

    If you have go this far thanks for listening, hope to be feeling more myself tomorrow. :wave_cry:
     
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  3. northenlass

    northenlass Full Member

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    its normal to miss your mum. my mum died when i was a young child and 40 years later i still miss her every day your mum is such a big impact on your life. the other thing we have a right to have up and down days we are at the age that we are allowed to have off days
    if thing are really getting me down i usually have a rant on the computer mainly on word have a good cry and and then delete it but it makes me feel a hell of a lot better and it saves me geting in to trouble saying some thing i dont really mean
    having a long distant relationship isnt easy at the best of times i know i have been there in the past
    but one day all this will get that bit better and we are all here for you xx
     
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  4. vanda

    vanda plodding away

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    Thanks for your kind words. Have been emotional and tearful for most of the evening but am feeling more positive at the mo. Tomorrow is another day.
     
  5. Mini

    Mini Administrator Staff Member

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    I am very sorry Vanda to hear you lost your Mum, it is really one of the hardest things to come to terms with in life as it is such a huge loss.:hug99:

    You are bound to be feeling very raw as it has only been a couple of months...in time it will not hurt as much as it does now.

    I lost my Mum almost thirteen years ago and I still miss her:cry:
     
  6. northenlass

    northenlass Full Member

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    vanda you are more than welcome im on face book at magstaylor if you feel you want to have a rant and a rave about life or a laughor just some one to talk to feel free to add me if you want ive just come to terms with a lot of issues that have been there way back and i am just coming to terms with things that happened a long time ago so things wont always be sorted in a day but you have have someone who is willing to listen on the good and bad days x
     
  7. jockiejoe

    jockiejoe Wanting Is The Key

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    well vanda life aint easy after losing your mum, whilst both parents are equal etc in ones upbringing, I do believe there is a deeper loss when u lose your mother. Ie Its that bond that she carried you to life. But In reflection my friend, just think what your mum would want for you. ie the best for you in every way, be it happiness n health. Use the love n fun you both shared n face every day with a smile. Life can be tough for many reasons Vanda but never give in, its better to lose a battle fighting than throw the towel in my friend. Lean on the memories u have re ur mum n use that spirit that she would want for u to be happy n healthy n smiling n laughing as best u can every day
     
    Last edited: 27 February 2010
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  8. 10st10lbs

    10st10lbs Gold Member

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    it's better to let it all out, right? :) your mum would be proud of anything you achieved, saw the amount you've lost since you restarted and that's brilliant, all you can do is keep it up.. everyone has crappy off days, and if make up is gonna cheer you up then you may aswell bathe in it ;) don't feel alone honey, i know it's easy to say, but you do have this whole virtual world through which you can reach millions of people, people who know exactly how you feel and you can be each others' rocks.. if you find it really difficult to talk to your partner about your feelings for whatever reason, i'd suggest asking them to read your posts on here, maybe just even the first post to this thread, so they can see how you were feeling.. i'm sure they'd be supportive if they knew xxx
     
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  9. vanda

    vanda plodding away

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    Thanks for the post and thanks for caring.

    Just an update from me. I returned to work 6 weeks after mum died and obviously I still miss her, but I restarted ww in March and am doing great. I feel happier and more in control of my life now than I have done in a long time.

    Everything seems to be slotting into place, strangely enough my relationship with oh is at an all time high too, doesnt feel like 9 years we have been together. No stress just feeling happy and positive about the future. Now I know I will lose the weight and be happy with my life. My mum would be very proud.

    Thanks again
     
  10. northenlass

    northenlass Full Member

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    im really glad that it all positive
    xx
     
  11. Wolfy

    Wolfy New Member

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    Glad you are feeling better, lost my Mum last year in July and have put on 3 stone since then too. We were very close, she was supportive and great fun and I spoke to her daily on the phone so there is a big hole but Im slowly picking myself up again. Need to get back on plan and be positive
     
  12. Karen_WB

    Karen_WB New Member

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    Hi Vanda

    I just wanted to say I'm glad you're feeling better. I lost my mum 4 years ago and my dad 2 years ago so I know how tough it can be.

    Well done for starting WW and congrats on doing so well.

    Karen :)
     
  13. sparklebug

    sparklebug Full Member

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    Vanda, i'm so glad you're feeling better, i lost my brother 4 weeks ago and i know where you're coming from on comfort eating. If you need a hug, vent or support we're always here for you. Your mum will be proud of you so much ♥♥
     
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