Well, I have well and truely fallen off the wagon. I weighed in yesterday and found I'd only lost a pound again this week, so I felt quite disheartened about that, but I decided to stick with it and keep going....until I was home alone last night!
:break_diet:
I stuck to my points all day, then my OH went out to the pub, my little girl was sound asleep in bed and I was sat in the lounge trying to watch tv - but I couldn't concentrate on anything I was watching because I was really stewing about my weight and how badly it's affecting me (for example - I've hardly left the house since the new year because I'm just too uncomfortable in the my clothes and I just can't be bothered to 'make the effort' to get ready to go out when it always results in my looking and feeling awful!). So, after a little cry (and remembering that this is at 9pm last night and after I'd eaten my points for the day) I hit the kitchen!!
I ate a peanut butter sandwich, 4 chocolate hobnobs, a packet of crisps and a massive glass of Baileys with ice! Then I went to bed and cried some more because I felt so bad for eating it when I KNOW it would just make me feel worse in the long run...which it did. I woke up this morning, had my all bran for breakfast and measured out my milk for the day...then I sat down and starting thinking about it all again. So I yet again I found myself back in the kitchen eating my OH's sandwiches that he forgot to take to work AGAIN, followed by a choc hobnob, a packet of crisps, a Fox low fat bar and my daughters milky bar buttons (it's shameful isn't it, I've even resorted to steeling my babies sweets!!...not that she's really allowed them anyway, but that's not the point, they were bought for her not for me!).
So now I'm really angry with myself, I feel really really really really down and all I want to do is cry (and eat).
I'm gonna try and get back on it tomorrow, but my attitude is far from positive at the moment....why can't I do this?!! I've only been following the diet for 3 weeks and already I've given up?! Why can't I do this?! It's no wonder I'm so f***** fat!!!!
I'm gonna try and get out the house for a bit now, for my daughters sake (she doesn't need to see me stuffing my face and wallowing in self pity).
Bye for now people.
:wave_cry:
:break_diet:
I stuck to my points all day, then my OH went out to the pub, my little girl was sound asleep in bed and I was sat in the lounge trying to watch tv - but I couldn't concentrate on anything I was watching because I was really stewing about my weight and how badly it's affecting me (for example - I've hardly left the house since the new year because I'm just too uncomfortable in the my clothes and I just can't be bothered to 'make the effort' to get ready to go out when it always results in my looking and feeling awful!). So, after a little cry (and remembering that this is at 9pm last night and after I'd eaten my points for the day) I hit the kitchen!!
I ate a peanut butter sandwich, 4 chocolate hobnobs, a packet of crisps and a massive glass of Baileys with ice! Then I went to bed and cried some more because I felt so bad for eating it when I KNOW it would just make me feel worse in the long run...which it did. I woke up this morning, had my all bran for breakfast and measured out my milk for the day...then I sat down and starting thinking about it all again. So I yet again I found myself back in the kitchen eating my OH's sandwiches that he forgot to take to work AGAIN, followed by a choc hobnob, a packet of crisps, a Fox low fat bar and my daughters milky bar buttons (it's shameful isn't it, I've even resorted to steeling my babies sweets!!...not that she's really allowed them anyway, but that's not the point, they were bought for her not for me!).
So now I'm really angry with myself, I feel really really really really down and all I want to do is cry (and eat).
I'm gonna try and get back on it tomorrow, but my attitude is far from positive at the moment....why can't I do this?!! I've only been following the diet for 3 weeks and already I've given up?! Why can't I do this?! It's no wonder I'm so f***** fat!!!!
I'm gonna try and get out the house for a bit now, for my daughters sake (she doesn't need to see me stuffing my face and wallowing in self pity).
Bye for now people.
:wave_cry: