Twas the month after Christmas

Discussion in 'CD Off Topic' started by maro11, 16 January 2010 Social URL.

  1. maro11

    maro11 Full Member

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    This made me laugh, hope it cheers you up, too [​IMG]


    Twas the month after Christmas,
    and all through the house,
    Nothing would fit me,
    not even a blouse.

    The cookies I'd nibbled,
    the chocolate I'd taste
    At the holiday parties
    had gone to my waist.

    When I got on the scales
    there arose such a number!
    When I walked to the store
    (less a walk than a lumber),

    I'd remember the marvellous meals I'd prepared;
    The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
    The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
    And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."

    As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
    And prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
    I said to myself, as I only can,
    "You can't spend a Summer, disguised as a man!"

    So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
    Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
    Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
    Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

    I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
    I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
    I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
    I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

    I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
    But isn't that what January is for?
    Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
    Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet!
     
    Mini and Blingbabe like this.
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  3. enlightenme2

    enlightenme2 Gold Member

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    Great one! Pretty much sums up how I feel
     
  4. Aseyan

    Aseyan Full Member

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    Haha! I love it! Especially the bit about munching on a carrot and quietly crying.
     
  5. Zoe.D

    Zoe.D loving life

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    lol- Fantastic, so glad not to feel like that this year though.
     
  6. Mini

    Mini Administrator Staff Member

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    :pLOL:rolleyes::cry:
     
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