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What would you do?

S: 33st0lb C: 21st13.5lb G: 15st0lb BMI: 46.8 Loss: 11st0.5lb(33.44%)
#1
My son is 9 and applied to Britain's Got Talent as a singer. We let him apply because he really wanted to have the experience. To be honest I didn't think he'd get picked, put it to the back of my mind and didn't think about it again but I've just had an email saying he has an audition....

Now he's a lovely boy and sings well but unfortunately doesn't have a particularly special voice. Would it be dreadful of me to tell him about the audition and have him go through with it even though I have explained to him that the likelyhood of him getting through to the next round is very small. Or do I pretend I didn't get this email because he's assumed he missed out when we didn't hear earlier. I'm not sure what to do!

My dilema is that I know he'd love the experience of going along to the NEC and singing, he knows he's unlikely to get picked but will it effect him more than he thinks it will? I'm now regretting letting him apply.... Plus, I really don't want to be on TV looking as I do!!:eek:

Help!
 
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S: 18st1lb C: 13st9lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 29.9 Loss: 4st6lb(24.51%)
#2
Firstly I think you need to ask yourself what is the main reason...is it that you dont want your son to be disappointed or it the fear of appearing on TV. You say your son knows he's unlikely to go any further so it seems that he has his head screwed on.

If it is that you can't face appearing on TV...Could you take someone else with you that will then appear before the cameras with him. Granny, auntie etc?

If he really wants the experience and you think hes good enough to appear and you think he can handle the (possible) rejection then I think you should allow him to go but consider asking a close friend or relative to be the person in front of the camera.


The only other thing I can suggest is telling him that he has got an audition, be totally honest with him about EVERYTHING and offer some voice lessons and to reapply next year
 
S: 33st0lb C: 21st13.5lb G: 15st0lb BMI: 46.8 Loss: 11st0.5lb(33.44%)
#3
Thanks, I wouldn't stop him just because of me, I think he's missed out enough having me for a mother already! He sings in tune and very sweetly, he's a member of the county junior choir so I know it's not me being a pushy mother who thinks her son's amazing when he isn't BUT his voice is just sweet, do you know what I mean? I'd hate for him to be picked on if something went wrong and he got upset. Grrr, I must engage brain before doing things like this!
 
S: 18st1lb C: 13st9lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 29.9 Loss: 4st6lb(24.51%)
#4
If you fear him being picked on at school then only you can decide whats best. If its fear that he'll be picked on because of your weight then take a relative to be with him in front of the cameras, if its fear he'll be picked on for appearing on TV then talk to him about how jealousy works with kids.

And as for the "me for a mother" comment, STOP IT! You carried him, gave birth to him, love him and provide him with far more than many kids get...He has confidence and a yearning to experience things. YOU have given him that.
 

Stefanie

Silver Member
S: 15st8lb C: 11st11.5lb G: 10st10lb BMI: 27.5 Loss: 3st10.5lb(24.08%)
#5
As far as I know, you go through 2 or 3 auditions before appearing on tv and that is if you are good enough. So I personally would take him and if he does make it, deal with it when the time comes xx
 
#6
Yes my friend applied and there are three auditions before the main shows. I think it would be good for you to take him along to let him know you support him even if he doesn't make it then at least he will know your there for him. Also if this is what he wants to do when he's older then it will be good practice for him :) xx
 
S: 16st6lb C: 9st6lb G: 9st6lb BMI: 24.1 Loss: 7st0lb(42.61%)
#7
I think you should take him, personally I would tell him how great he is because you can't give a child too much confidence IMO. You have to believe in him and he has to believe in himself.
From what you say you think he won't get through the first audition so don't talk too much about going further in the competition and only concentrate on that day, it'll be a great experience if nothing else. I think there's a lot of hanging about so he might see that it's not as glamorous as all that.
If he doesn't get to the next audition tell him to keep trying, next year etc it never hurts to have a dream.
 
S: 107kg C: 85kg G: 79kg BMI: 33.2 Loss: 22kg(20.56%)
#8
Now he's a lovely boy and sings well but unfortunately doesn't have a particularly special voice. Would it be dreadful of me to tell him about the audition and have him go through with it even though I have explained to him that the likelyhood of him getting through to the next round is very small. Or do I pretend I didn't get this email because he's assumed he missed out when we didn't hear earlier. I'm not sure what to do!

Plus, I really don't want to be on TV looking as I do!!:eek:

Help!
Thanks, I wouldn't stop him just because of me, I think he's missed out enough having me for a mother already! He sings in tune and very sweetly, he's a member of the county junior choir so I know it's not me being a pushy mother who thinks her son's amazing when he isn't BUT his voice is just sweet, do you know what I mean? I'd hate for him to be picked on if something went wrong and he got upset. Grrr, I must engage brain before doing things like this!
Oh Laura !!!! I would really love to give you a good shake and then a great big hug !!!!

First of all I understand perfectly how you feel about appearing on T.V. whilst still big. Several issues here. One is look at what you have lost and be proud. Your weight loss is inspirational. Head high girl !!! Another is how sad that society has made us cuddlier folks feel second class or inferior. Only a very small proportion of the worlds population have the "perfect" figure. Whatever that is. Lastly this is about your boy not you.

You say he has missed out because of you. I doubt it. You say " a mother like me " I think you are a mum to be proud of. You are on here worried enough about him to seek advice. I am sure there are other people in your position who would just ignore the audition all together.

What amazes me most of all and I mean this kindly and nicely..........you are the first mum I have come across in my long life that "doesn't" think their child has star qualities. How very refreshing. It makes me like you even more than I did before.

If he sings in the county choir he must have quality in his voice. He must be good. You can not tell me that in a large county they would choose mediocre voices.

Tell him today !!! Take him, enjoy the experience with him and I for one think he will get through the auditions and I am going to watch him on the television screaming his name and boring my husband by telling him, " I know his mum , I know his mum, I KNOW HIS MUM !!"

I am looking forward to starting a support thread for him on here !!!

If he doesn't get through, no problem. You will always know you gave him the chance and he will know it too.

One last thing and I promise I will shut up..............for goodness sake do not tell him the chances of getting through are remote. That would really sap his confidence. He must go there believing he can get through.


hugs xxx
 
S: 17st11.5lb C: 14st8lb G: 13st3.5lb BMI: 35 Loss: 3st3.5lb(18.24%)
#9
Hey Laura

What a dilema for you. Its great to encourage your children to follow their dreams of course but I too would be having doubts. That sort of show is just a sausage factory for Cowel & Co to make money. They care far more about column inches and lining their pockets than any contestants welfare. IMO, its not a show for young children as they just cant possibly comprehend the negative effects of modern fame.

I think your sense of realism about his talent/chances are spot on (because that will help him manage any disappointment he may encounter) and with that in mind, I have no doubt you will do what is right for him as you have all the bases covered.

I would not want to be in your shoes but congrats on having such a talented son - you must be very proud. :)
 
S: 12st6lb C: 12st4lb G: 10st7lb BMI: 29.5 Loss: 0st2lb(1.15%)
#10
What a fantastic day it would be for both of you. My daughter is 10, and I know, mature enough to make her own decision. And also mature enough to know that few get through, and it is not always the best that do anyway. So rejection is just unlucky, not necessarily a reflection on talent. Well that what she believes, and as she is performing arts mad, I'm not telling her any different!!!

He will love this. A day in the smoke, and a fantstic experience
 
S: 33st0lb C: 21st13.5lb G: 15st0lb BMI: 46.8 Loss: 11st0.5lb(33.44%)
#11
Aww thank you all for your opinions. It means so much to have 'outside' help sometimes. You're right about the auditions not being the real thing that we see on TV and it's helped me decide that I'd be silly not to take him along. Chances are it will only be this audition and then he has the experience, a fun day out (waiting in hours of queues!), and it's something he can look back on.

I understand what you're saying downsizing.. and I'm under no illusion that the TV company care even a little about how people feel, if they did we wouldn't get the toe curling auditions we see! We will take him along to this one, I'll see how he goes, only if it's good and he's happy would we consider taking him to the next if they wanted. I certainly won't let them use him as a one of their mean - let's all laugh and joke about how terrible they are - competitors.

Fillymum, you made me cry! Thank you for everything you said. I always swore I would never be a pushy mum, it must be great to have one of so many 'perfect' children;) but mine, wonderful as they are are simply wonderful, far from perfect! :giggle:

My husband was all for letting him go and told me not to be stupid...this is a man that I could happily strangle on a daily basis so nothing new there! We talked about it last night and agreed that it was probably in his best interest to take him and show him that it's not all amazing like you see on TV. We're encouraging, he knows we think he's amazing but I'd hate for any child to grow up thinking they are perfect and everyone should appreciate them. A bit of realism is needed though encouraging rather than bleak. That's how I hope we're raising them anyway...

He's a lovely boy and an exciting weekend, even if just that, should always crop up for us all from time to time in my opinion. :)

Thanks again everyone xx
 
S: 107kg C: 85kg G: 79kg BMI: 33.2 Loss: 22kg(20.56%)
#12
Sorry I made you cry !!!! LOL !!!!

Please let us know when you are going and let us know how he got on.

I will be sending positive vibes to your boy !!!!!
 

Beegee

The Big One
S: 19st3lb C: 11st10lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 28.1 Loss: 7st7lb(39.03%)
#13
Aw fillymum, I'm filling up here too - what lovely words! FWIW Laura, I think you're doing the right thing - your expectations are realistic, enjoy it for what it is and at least you won't be left wondering 'what if ...' in the future. Have a great day out!
 
#14
I wouldn't.
My daughter wanted to apply and I said no. She is 12 and, while she can sing well and hold a note, that's just it - she can sing and hold a note.
My opinion, so can a lot of kids.
I don't like these programmes because they are just about two things - making money and humiliating people.
Just my personal opinion - I think they are far too young at that age, stick with local and regional things if needs be but I wouldn't put my child through anything like that unless I really though they had it in them to go a long long way.

I mean no upset or insult by this but it's just what I think.
 
S: 21st2.5lb C: 19st0lb G: 9st5lb Loss: 2st2.5lb(10.29%)
#15
I think you sound like a great Mum. I think a day out where you can spoil him regardless of whether or not he gets through is a good idea.

I auditioned for panto in Glasgow when I was 10 (smaller scale I know) but the best part of the day was having my Mum all to myself. It didn't matter that I didn't get picked.
 

Wee Doll

Silver Member
S: 11st6lb C: 11st6lb G: 9st0lb BMI: 27.5 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#16
my friends is in the same position as you. Her daughter is 8 and also autistic and she has her audition tomorrow in scotland!

this little girl ( emma ) has an amazing voice like none i have ever heard for her age belting out ave maria

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFF_AP7D7MY
YouTube - Citybeat Young Star Search 2010 : Glengormley Heat : Emma Lowry

her mother thinks that she shouldnt go but she is letting her go to " let her get it out of her system"

i think she is doing the right thing .. you never know what will happen until you go for it :)


fingers crossed for your little boy to do well :)

xxx
 


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