Yet More Opinions

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by DaveP, 3 January 2008 Social URL.

  1. DaveP

    DaveP Full Member

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    My counsellor as you all know doesnt like me. I have only averaged.3.5 lbs a week on LL which in her eyes isnt good enough. She told me that she was unhappy with my progress and unless I lost alot of weight over christmas she was going to excuse me from the program.

    I went away for 3 weeks to visit my gf reletives in the US and she said that I had to lose 1 stone over 3 weeks. That doesnt seem so bad but she has set me a target which is a bit harsh considering the time of year and the fact I wouldnt be getting any exercise.

    I havent made it, I have lost 7 pounds and am 7 pounds short. She was clear about the goal. What do I do?
     
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  3. icemoose

    icemoose The Diet Guy

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    Funny isn't it as I see a 7 pound loss of the Xmas period as a massive success :)

    Suppose it is the way you decide to look at it!

    Mike
     
  4. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    My first reaction is that she doesnt sound very sympathic and I dont like her either.

    But does she know you more than we do and perhaps she believes you need more of a push.

    The only thing you can do is go and find out what is going to happen. Surely she will not exclude you just for not being a Saint. I dont think there were many saints over christmas.:)
     
  5. skinnymongoose

    skinnymongoose Full Member

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    Hi Dave,

    I have never done LL, I am a CD'er, but I have to say I think this is absolutely outrageous. Can you not find another counsellor? You are paying this unsupportive woman an awful lot of money every week. I think you deserve A LOT BETTER!! Fire her before she fires you!
    SM
     
    Last edited: 3 January 2008
  6. KD

    KD Gone fishing

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    Me too! Blimey, I'd expect a very special sticker if I'd done that :D

    Yes, possibly. I guess it depends on whether you 'cheat' and get those loses. She might feel that by being 100% you might have more motivation to keep going long term.

    Still...the goals should be yours and yours alone. It's your body after all. Really sounds like your LLC and you need a good heart to heart so she can understand what you need from her.
     
  7. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Can she do that!! Fire you from the class?? That seems extremely harsh and unsupportive!!
     
  8. Mini

    Mini Administrator Staff Member

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    Hi DaveP,

    Well done on your 7lb off over Christmas.:happy096:

    Have you tried talking to your counsellor about how you feel?

    I see from your blog you have been in and out of ketosis since you started LL and this is making the diet very difficult for you.

    Weekly weight loss varies so much from week to week and it is difficult those weeks when we only see a 1lb loss on the scales but the losses do average out over the month.

    3.5lb a week is a very good average weight loss.



    If you look here at mindless's weight loss history you can see it does vary.


    Mindless Now at Goal and 4lbs. under Before and After losing 144lbs.!!!
    [​IMG]


    [​IMG]



    [​IMG]


    History
    Week 1 to 4: - 16lb, - 11lb, - 4lb, - 6lb
    Week 5 to 8: -6lb, -3lb, -7lb, -3lb
    Week 9 to 12: -6lb, -4lb, -2lb, 0lb
    Week 13 and 14 then 15 and 16: -15lb, -1lb, -4lb
    Week 17, 18, 19: -5lb, -3lb, -3lb
    Week 20 and 21: -7lb (thats the Ton up folks)
    Week 22 and 23: 0lb (Birthday excuses), -5lbs
    Weeks 24 and 25: +8lbs (no excuses but a storm has broken and is rained out)
    Week 26, 27 and 28: -10lbs, -5lbs
    Weeks 29 and 30: -6lbs
    Week 31,32: -1/2lb (but I don't count that), 0lb (its official, I'm d**king about)
    Week 33,34: -9lbs (thats better), -6lbs (Oh my God a pound to go and I'm on holiday LOL)
    Week 35: +10lbs (another reason to hate holidays LOL)
    Week 36: -8lbs (after the yo - the yo)
    Week 37: -7lbs (gosh, guess that means I've made it
     
  9. DaveP

    DaveP Full Member

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    She is well within her rights to turn away people. She doesnt have to accept the money and therfore the people.

    No she doesnt know me very well. Im in a large class of around 10 and i only see her for an hour a week so I dont think she does. She is trying to get me focused but putting those sorts of barriers in front of me as I've already told her is more negative than positive.

    I too think I have done well to lose 7 lbs. I had christmas dinner and went back on the packs. Whereas I already know a couple of my LL buddies arent on them at all.

    I want to get a new counsellor but im not sure where to go.
     
  10. DaveP

    DaveP Full Member

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    Thanks Mini, I am in awe of the photos on your signiture, they are super awesome.

    With regards to my counsellor, I am goign to go to the weigh in and basically say. "Here I am 7 lbs lighter 14 lbs, take me or leave me."

    IF she does leave me I think ill either go on another LL course at a different place or try CD.
     
  11. Mini

    Mini Administrator Staff Member

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    Hi Dave,

    Mindless is a real inspiration to us all.:)

    I think if you could arrive early to the meeting or phone her before hand and tell her you would like to talk to her one on one and explain to her how you are feeling and express how unhappy you are that she does not fully appreciate how hard you are trying.

    If her response is still very negative then I think you would be best looking else-where as losing weight is very difficult and it is an emotional roller coaster and we need to feel we have the support we asked for and needed to help us and when that is not there it does create more problems than it solves.

    You have choices....

    Remember at the end of the day you are the customer and she is providing a service and more than lightly she won't want to see you go.

    Love Mini xxx
     
  12. DaveP

    DaveP Full Member

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    Yes thats a good way of looking at it.

    I am not a bad customer im sure there will be other places who want me.
     
  13. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    Way to go Dave:king2:
     
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  14. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    Well if i was your LLC I'd give you a blue peter badge for the 7lbs u managed to lose!!!

    ...*but I'm not a LLC, so errrrm...:rolleyes:
     
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  15. Miss Fenella

    Miss Fenella Full Member

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    I'd be reporting her unprofessional behaviour to LL and moving as soon as.

    In the interim you could call her as suggested and book time for a heart to heart and ask her in a positive way WTF is up ! ;)
     
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  16. Peridot

    Peridot Peridot

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    Presumably she's trying stick rather than carrot (maybe because this is an abstinent diet! :D) but it seems pretty rotten to me. Everyone loses differently - I was angelic through my 100 days and lost slowly, I think I'd have killed my LLC if she'd said it wasn't good enough and she was kicking me off. Bloody cheek! Her people skills stink.
     
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  17. scotwannabethin

    scotwannabethin Back to the grindstone!!

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    Dave, 7lbs is good, don't let her tell you differently!!! It is a tough time for everyone and I am glad it is over for one! To have lost weight over the festive period, especially whilst away on holiday is amazing.
    She should not be setting you targets. That is for you to do. I think, like the others, that you should see how it goes at group and if she isn't supportive then let her know that you will take your business elsewhere and tell LL central why.
    I have had some really low losses but my LLC was always supportive and never demanded more of me than I was able to give.
    swbt
     
  18. Deb G

    Deb G Silver Member

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    I actually LIKE the fact that we can get kicked out of class, because it PERSONALLY helps keep me on the straight and narrow. I hated going to WW and realising that it didn't really matter if I put weight on or lost it, which is why I never really lost it.

    We're only expected to average 3.5 lbs a week (stone a month) so to set a target of more than that is unrealistic and I think you should point that out. Maybe she's tried the supportive side but as you are lapsing quite a lot (not a criticism, so PLEASE don't take it as such) that she's decided to try a 'tough love' approach with you.

    Either way, I would discuss it with her - explain that you'll happily aim for the 3.5lbs a week and will try your best, and that the proverbial carrot works better for you than a bloomin' great big stick!

    Well done for your Xmas weightloss - but think what you COULD have achieved if you'd remained abstinent!
     
  19. Miss Fenella

    Miss Fenella Full Member

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    Deb - I agree with what you say especially about WW and knowing on this diet there is no excuse for putting weight on if you are abstaining (bar very few exceptions).

    I too think a chat is needed, people are grown ups on LL and are buying a service. I would hope a LLC could have an 'adult' conversation. At the moment she is just provoking my inner rebelious child and I don't even know her! :D
     
  20. Frejja

    Frejja Silver Member

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    crikey your LLC sounds scary...glad mine wasn't! Good luck
     
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