Step 1 Sole Source Confessions of a serial CWP returner

yes, just chalk it down and start again Betty. you never know. might not be too bad.
 
Indeed. That's what is say too. Only this morning I'm beating myself up for it.

Doesn't help that My OH is on tender hooks as he has just been told he may need a pacemaker at 34! So he is like a bear with a sore head.

All in all I feel stressed and blurgh. Now I have to present to my Nan's memorial today. Which is going to also be a fecking challenging ordeal. Hahaha. I think I need some laughing gas today! It feels like "one of those days" and it's only 8.22am...
 
Monday morning and I feel YAK.

Why is it that every single time I start a new plan something is always sent to knock me off track?! I'm having a bit of a wobble but valiantly trying to stay focused. I'm just brimming with frustration at the moment. Too much to go into but suffice to say that it's driving me demented.

Yesterday I walked for an hour and tried to get some head space. Today I've been up since the crack of dawn since DD 2 wanted to ice the cake we baked last night. Lord have mercy! Icing a cake with buttercream frosting at 6.15am is just too much to contemplate...

Anyway, here I am. Day off today, probably the last in a while since I'm moving to a new job next week ( that's what the CEO wanted to talk to me about) I'm get to create my own job title but essentially it's service development which I love!

Anyway....I'm trying to stay focused. Starting with water... All other things will follow.
 
Ooooooh I say that's great Betty! You sound very positive about your new job role, it sounds exciting and I can tell you're really going to get ur teeth into it!

The things are kids have us doing!! I must admit my daughters are very serious when it comes to their cake baking and all that malarkey, they hold me to ransom in the supermarket to get all the little sprinkle decorations and wot not, it's sweet tho isn't it lol I bet that cake looks and tastes delish!

I know Betty, it's easy for certain situations etc knock us off course with our eating/diet, it's like while we're focusing on other things, we lose focus with our weight/diet etc, don't beat yourself up too much, we know about our 'blip' episodes and the rule is damage limitation lol, try not to go too off the rails and keep going on those walks to help clear your head whenever u need to x
 
Why, thank you. Of course you forget about these achievements when you wake up in the middle of a s@it storm!

OH has now decided that delivering leaflets is too much like hard work. Maybe he thinks my new job is licence for me to keep him!!! Of course... I wouldn't mind but he is also doing a HND which is supported by his employer. He has until may left and he goes and throws the towel in!!!!! I can't believe him. Such an immature an short sighted behaviour.

I know what it is to hate your job. I know how hard it is to be constantly hounded in the workplace and so I do have compassion for him, but equally I know how hard it was when I lost that job through no fault of my own. With all the responsibilities that life brings.

It's making me have a panic attack just contemplating it.

I have to just let it go and what will be will be. It's the only thing I can do otherwise I will get myself into such a state that doing this will be even harder.

Focus and determination is what I need. Especially since I probably can't throw money away for nothing right now.
 
Hiya luvvy, how's it going today? Stay focused and let's do this! As you can hear I'm feeling quite determined today lol, I just cannot let just one day turn into a week long binge!!

Wtf is that all about, cucumber+lettuce=3lbs?!?!!! I don't know what that's all about but I wouldn't take any notice of it, I'm trying to keep away from my scales although having said that I've already jumped onto them about 3 times between the hours of 6-8am, how utterly ridiculous!!!!

Has OH rang ya??!

X
 
Lou OH is being king weirdo.

While I was out yesterday he stealthily crept home to fix his laptop ( which he then left on the arm of the sofa to ensure I saw it!) ate some food, picked up some mail, cleaned out the car and then left. Not before texting me to say something innocuous to let me know he had been there. He has not taken anymore stuff. So this is all part of his rouse!!! I think he is properly disturbed at the moment. Nothing I say is any good. He is angry at the world!!!!!

Oh well off to the train now!!!! Poo.
 
Ok so here comes an accountability post,

I've spent much of the last weekend chocking down biscuits as many as I can lay my hands on...why? Well because I've been trying to quell my emotions down with good. I really don't know how else to process them.

Had a rough few weeks to try and start the diet properly but then I realise that's what I always say!!!! Hahah. So either I stay a fat victim forever or I do this!!!!!
 
Awww you can do it! We all have our wobbly moments but ultimately we know that we are going to deal with our excess baggage lol it's not an easy task though, especially when there's so much going on in our lives and food is the one thing that keeps me sane because I don't smoke and hardly drink so I gotta be allowed 1 vice eh!
 
Me too! Have given up smoking. Don't drink. Must admit a Marlborough light looks good right now!!!!
 
Me too! Have given up smoking. Don't drink. Must admit a Marlborough light looks good right now!!!!
 
Hello diary!

Well new day tomorrow. One where I need to regroup and focus. Had a bit of a mad few weeks which have led to very half hearted attempts to be a hardcore 100% all or nothing kind of gal.

Tmi but I have been bunged up for days too!!!! Now I'm dropping rabbit pellets!.....Going to have to sort that out!!!!! It's darn uncomfortable.

Off for a run and to pick up packs soon so I will be raring to go...
 
Crikey!!! Been away a week and off plan.

I'm not weighing until tomorrow but what I do know is I have found skinny sprinkles!!! Ok so, at the moment I have the glutinous feeling you get when you have eaten yourself out of house and home, only I have not. I have had a skinny sprinkle and some water so far this evening and I couldn't eat a thing, not even my pack... No apatite at all.

Flipping brilliant!!!!

So I think I may well have this down now. I'll use them until I hit ketosis then will just use them when I get up...

Here is to twelve weeks of skinny
 
Hope u don't mind me asking I'm new to all this but what's skinny sprinkles sounds great if it's making u feel that full lol xx
 
I just stumbled across them. If you search for them they are on a website that sells everything that minimins will asteric out if I write it (a-mazon)

They are made from the same thing as zero noodles only you add it to water. They are strawberry flavoured and they are quite nice!!! But importantly they fill your tummy up a treat do if like me you are a snacker, then they reduce the urge (I say reduce because I did feel a bit hungry this afternoon but not sure if that's psychological or habit)

It's early days but I'm hopefully they will help me crack it!!!
 
How are you doing bettiesrevenge? I hope you're back in a good headspace.
 
Hiya!!!

Well sort of. I've got a dehydration hangover today. Which is bad news. Feel utterly poop. These skinny sprinkles appear to suck all the water out of your body. So I have to really increase my intake more than previously. They seem to be doing something though. Although I'm wondering if the reputed 4lb average weekly weight loss from the hundreds of reviews may actually be water???? Maybe it's like consuming silica gel???

Anyway. Climbed a waterfall yesterday and today I'm off for a sedate swim and to find some Easter eggs!!!!
 
So are you using the sprinkles rather than Cambridge or doing both? Hope you've had a lovely day!
 
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