Good morning dear Diary.
I hope I'm doing this right as I want to keep a weight loss journal and hope this is the way it's done.
Anyway today is my first day of Exante's TS. I did intend to start yesterday but one of my girlfriends from South Africa came over to spend the day as we are celebrating the appearance of the sun over here in England. Usually when a girlfriend comes over it will involve food chats and wine. As the sun is putting in a regular appearance all of this get done in the garden.
Taking into account all that I have just told you, I knew it was not a good day to start my weight loss journey. So... I earmarked today as the day and weirdly found myself feeling less relieved and more ancious about not starting. I'm taking this as a good sign, as my thinking is that I obviously want this a whole lot.
Of course my intelligence and common sense always tells me that I want to lose the burden of my weight but my emotions don't always recieve the message and will sometimes work independently to undermine my efforts. I'm sure a lot of people who are overweight like me will understand what I'm saying as all the years of abusing my body with food has somehow I think turned off the connection that my emotions had with my intelligence regarding food.
Anyway I am feeling positive as I think the underlying feelings of expectation I was experiencing yesterday was clearly my emotions feeling regret at not having started my Exante.
Also to make matters worse my girlfriend has lost loads of weight recently due to marital problems and loads of stress at work. Of course I felt compassion and sorry for her situation but I could not stop focusing on her weight loss. To someone as overweight as me and who spent most of her childs growing up as more of a tubby mummy than a yummy mummy. Weight loss however gained is, weight loss and I thought she looked fantastic.
Sooo... today is the day and so far feeling fabulous and looking forward to the week ahead.
Starting weight = 20st 2lbs
Height = 5ft 5
Overall conclusion = too fat:cry:
Dear diary see you tomorrow and goodbye weight forever:wave_cry:
I hope I'm doing this right as I want to keep a weight loss journal and hope this is the way it's done.
Anyway today is my first day of Exante's TS. I did intend to start yesterday but one of my girlfriends from South Africa came over to spend the day as we are celebrating the appearance of the sun over here in England. Usually when a girlfriend comes over it will involve food chats and wine. As the sun is putting in a regular appearance all of this get done in the garden.
Taking into account all that I have just told you, I knew it was not a good day to start my weight loss journey. So... I earmarked today as the day and weirdly found myself feeling less relieved and more ancious about not starting. I'm taking this as a good sign, as my thinking is that I obviously want this a whole lot.
Of course my intelligence and common sense always tells me that I want to lose the burden of my weight but my emotions don't always recieve the message and will sometimes work independently to undermine my efforts. I'm sure a lot of people who are overweight like me will understand what I'm saying as all the years of abusing my body with food has somehow I think turned off the connection that my emotions had with my intelligence regarding food.
Anyway I am feeling positive as I think the underlying feelings of expectation I was experiencing yesterday was clearly my emotions feeling regret at not having started my Exante.
Also to make matters worse my girlfriend has lost loads of weight recently due to marital problems and loads of stress at work. Of course I felt compassion and sorry for her situation but I could not stop focusing on her weight loss. To someone as overweight as me and who spent most of her childs growing up as more of a tubby mummy than a yummy mummy. Weight loss however gained is, weight loss and I thought she looked fantastic.
Sooo... today is the day and so far feeling fabulous and looking forward to the week ahead.
Starting weight = 20st 2lbs
Height = 5ft 5
Overall conclusion = too fat:cry:
Dear diary see you tomorrow and goodbye weight forever:wave_cry: