Dating dramas and other stories by the Lighter Lifers at Large!

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by annaphylactic, 1 December 2008 Social URL.

  1. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    Dating dramas! (and other stories)
    by the Lighter Lifers at Large
    :candledinner:

    Hehe, well - as promised to a few of you that were reading my endless 'man rants', here is a thread dedicated to all of us that are finding our mojo peeking out from under the layer of fat (speaking from experience), grasping the confidence and getting 'out there' again.

    It's been like a particularly convoluted season of Eastenders in my life recently - and although I think (I hope) I have found someone FAB now... it's still great to have somewhere to vent about the good and the bad times... not to mention the weird and wonderful first date stories...

    So - I know I am not alone... Last Straw is off on a date with a handsome stallion (Not literally. That's wrong.) and I think I remember Pete/Andy/Guy (bad memory!?) was about to embark on a similar road...

    So here we go - enjoy!!
    A xx:flowers:
     
    Last edited: 1 December 2008
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  3. futureyummymummy

    futureyummymummy Silver Member

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    Ooo yay I can now live vicariously through you lot, I love a good drama :p.

    Emma xXx
     
  4. Guy

    Guy Likes to lurk

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    lol, not me Anna. I think my wife would have something to say about it.
     
  5. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    Haha - yeah - thought I got that one wrong, lol - I've just got a rubbish memory. Andy? Pete? Was it one of you guys?? Lol x
     
  6. SerenityValley

    SerenityValley Surgically happy.

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    I've chatted to a few women on a dating site - I may show you the link to my profile at some point so you can give me tips. Not had good experiences yet (including one woman on a webcam who appeared to pick her nose and eat it).

    But I am terribly excited about the prospect of dating!
     
  7. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    lol - thats horrible Andy! I hope it was just the stutter effect of webcams, and not what it looked like. Surely no one would do that on a live webcam!!!

    Hang in there though - gotta sort through the rubble to find the gems. :)
     
  8. SerenityValley

    SerenityValley Surgically happy.

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    Right now, I'd make do with some rubble :lol:
     
  9. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Oh I'm looking forward to reading some of these :)

    Andy that is so gross - oh the joys of webcams!
     
  10. roundrachel

    roundrachel Silver Member

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    My OH took me on a 'first date' last weekend (having been with him for 12 years). He said that seeing as I'm now a completely different woman he wanted to get to know me again.
    Was all very lovely and we behaved like newlyweds all weekend-and continue to do so.
    I know he's always loved me even when I was at my biggest but when he says he fancies me now I actually believe him.
    (remember your thread about being swept off your feet by your OH BL?) Seems weight loss improves a lot of things ;-)

    To all of you getting the confidence to get into the dating game again, I'm sure your new bodies will give the new confidence. I think it's a very sexy trait indeed.

    Good luck and let us hear your stories!! xx
     
  11. pete10141748

    pete10141748 Postaholic

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    hmm, don't remember saying anything about dating yet Anna........... but as you seem to want stories, well, here we go!

    I've been on 3 first dates with girls I met online in the past few months, and none of them worked out very well sadly;

    1) the girl was lovely to chat to, but when I met her for a coffee it was a whole different story, I think the "barrier" of email/online chat was a comfort for her, as in real conversation she could carely manage more than a mumble of a few words. Maybe she was just shy, I don't know, but considering I can talk for England, Scotland, Wales and part of Ireland I really need someone I can converse with. so she didn't get called upon again.

    2) A few weeks after that I met another for a drink in the pub, and this girl massively lied about what she looked like, I think it was a case of finding that 1 "good picture" that people tend to have of themselves and using that as her profile pic. I hate to be derogatory, and I'm not one to judge on sight (as I hope others dont me) but basically, she looked like a $10 hooker on a bad night. OK, so I don't *actually* know what a $10 hooker on a bad night really looks like, all I know is that I felt like I had brough a tramp off the street to buy her a drink.
    I hastily exited and made sure she didn't get my phone number.

    *sigh*

    3) the third girl I went on a date with was actually really nice. Pretty, intelligent, could hold a decent conversation, but sadly she never returned my calls, so that go dead-ended in a hurry.


    Lately, I 've been spending a lot of time with a good female friend of mine. For about 4 years (end of college and most of my Uni days) we were kinda on-off, always liking each other but never wanting to be serious. Now she has a daughter (father isn't involved, isn't even in the country) and I've been helping her out to look after her a lot. I know we still like each other, but the baby (she's only 7 months) kinda makes it complicated, she has to live at home to afford to look after her and I don't really want the responsability of a child (even if it's not my own) to look after, pay for, teach etc.

    Hmm, confusing and difficult situation I find myself in, indeed.... :confused: :( :cry:

    WHOA! Didn't mean for this to get all serious-like, was supposed to be light-hearted look at first dates! lol

    Oh well. Hopefully by the time I've lost some more of this poundage I'll have a clearer sense of what I want or where I'm going :sigh:
     
  12. bekimo

    bekimo Fighting Demons....

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    Wow Pete, haven't you had some interesting encounters!

    My odd friends have set me up on a blind date for NYE!! I am super apprehensive. For one, I have a very bad track record with their mates (I won't go into that though ;)) Anyway, if it goes tragically wrong, I can run away! There are enough people going to get lost!!

    Oh, and when I put my new pic up as my facebook profile pic, I got an IM (about three minutes later) from this guy that I fell for a couple of years back and he really f**ed up my head! I'm absolutely petrified I'm going to fall for his sweet talk again and forget the fact he's a dick!!

    On the plus side, one of my best mates kissed me on friday night and I thought it would be weird, but we've been sat here for 6 hours chattin away and watching indiana jones and it's all forgotten! Phew!

    Why can't life be less like a Soap Opera!?

    B x
     
  13. pete10141748

    pete10141748 Postaholic

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    Nice one Beks, good luck on the blind date, and awww for your best mate, he probably just wanted to show you he cares and is proud of you :)


    and as for my encounters, well, that's nothing, this was a tale I wasn't going to make public but I've ended up posting it over in the CD forum as a reply to another topic, so what the hell;



    While we were in our first year of 6th form college, me and my life-long best mate (without telling each other through fear of exactly the same thing) basically traded girlfriends!

    I took her out to help her get over their break-up and we ended up together, and he did the same with my ex too! (we got together around the same time, broke up with them around the same time, got together with the others' ex around the same time, and to top it all the 2 ladies were very good friends too!)

    When it all came out a few weeks later, well, a messy situation doesn;t describe it. All 4 of us didn't know what to say, or where to look.
    After a long discussion, we basically decided that, what they hey, if we all were happy with the new relationships, why ruin it just because of who we used to date? It didn't last long though, I think that the girls just found it too weird after a few more weeks, and called it off.

    Me and my mate were fine with it all though, in fact I truely believe it brought us closer as we knew that we could even go through something like that and still remain best of friends with no hard feelings, even feeling happy for the other; and we are still best mates today (in January 2009 it'll be 18 years since we met! :eek: )


    Long time ago now, but the memories of all our faces is fresh in my head as the day it happened lol :D
     
  14. futureyummymummy

    futureyummymummy Silver Member

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    I'm so glad I'm married and don't have to go through all this lol.

    I was a single mom with a 6 week old when me and my husband got together (we'd been friends for about a year and we'd always said thats all we'd ever be lol) god knows how scary the whole situation must have been for him but here we are 5 years later still going strong! Mind you the first time he took me to meet his mom he took me to stay for a week and didn't tell her I had a baby :eek: she thought Owen was his and the looks she was giving me were sooooo evil lol, funny though that now Owen is the grandchild she's closest too out of all 7 of them :).

    Sorry went a bit off topic there :p

    Emma xXx
     
  15. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    Well well well, what can I say... Pete, you floozy! :D Honestly, they are like buses at the moment, huh? Brilliant! Keep digging through and you'll uncover your diamond soon enough.

    I hate it when people use photos that look nothing like themselves. I mean, to have 'a' posey pic is fine, but you need a good 3/4 that are normal too, otherwise god knows what you are getting into!

    Over the years I've met about 12 guys off the internet, and a few of them worked out, but it can be a long old trawl trying to sift through who's a prat and who's not!!

    Anyway - after being all over the shop over the last few months, and having varying degrees of illicit (sounds filthy, but can't think of the word!) encounters with a few different guys - I set up this thread and as if by magic *POOF* it looks like I am off the scrap heap!

    As many of you will remember, I was kind of seeing a guy (my OH-type-person, as he became known), but he was a total plonker and was really distant, non-tactile etc, and I spent the vast majority of our time together feeling like a bit of a plum. When I'd question him (we'd been friends for years) he'd assure me it wasn't anything to do with 'us', he just had a lot on his mind....

    With the help of a few of you on here (you know who you are!), I came to realise I deserve SO much more than that... I wanted to - in time - be adored, lusted after, the centre of someone's universe; and I wasn't prepared to adopt such a lack of self respect by hanging around with my now ex-OH-type-person. So - there I was, single again...

    Then, literally a week or so later (10 days ago-ish) I was in a bar in town for my friends birthday and this guy that I've liked for a while was there. We'd had a date at the beginning of the summer, but he was producing a film and was very stressed out and blew me off. I had similar "well, fine, if he doesn't want me, that's HIS loss" thoughs, but then last week he pulled me to one side in front of ALL our mutual friends and told me he was a total idiot, had been thinking about things alot and "if I could cope with going out with an unemployed film producer/chef/recruitment consultant", he'd be honoured to do things properly - then kissed me.

    It was like something out of a film - my friends were all gobsmacked (as was I!) and that's that. I went to his flat twice last week and last night he 'stayed over' for the first time - I made some quip about it being our fourth 'official' date (despite knowing each other for a long time) and he was like 'dating, shmating - you're my girlfriend, and you better get used to it'!!

    According to friends, he's been flashing my photo around, telling everyone all about me, wanting to see me all the time... it's all a bit sickening I'm sure.

    It's very early days, so who knows what the future holds - but for now, I am one happy girlie :)

    Weird things too... for those of you that have an opinion on superstitions/coincidences...
    1) 10th December is BOTH of our birthdays
    2) We were both recruitment consultants that managed bands part time - and our paths never crossed!
    3) Our dad's died in the same year
    4) We have matching moles on our cheeks (literally, exactly the same)
    ... dammit, I've gone blank... literally every time we get talking we're like "STOP IT! That's the same for me!"

    Anyway - Bekimo.... embrace your New Years blind date, could be a giggle, even if you don't find the guy attractive - I've met some fab friends through my mates' meddling! :)

    Roundrachel - your 'first' date sounded lovely. You're absolutely right - when my OH (and a real one!) says he fancies me, it feels genuine. My last proper ex was the same, but I didn't believe it... the body confidence I am starting to get is soaring. :D

    Andy - that webcam incident sounds rank - I'd like to think that she wouldn't have done that, but I'm sure you wouldn't say that unless you were sure. What a greb!! Haha. Good luck on the rest of your search, and feel free to link me your profile (I'm on pretty much all of them, so no need to worry) for some tips, although I'm sure it's fine.

    Right then - this was a pretty long post after all that. Spot the loved up one :)

    Right - ought to do some work.

    A xx
     
  16. futureyummymummy

    futureyummymummy Silver Member

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    How fab Anna thats a cute story to tell the grandkids ;), soooo romantic too to do that in front of everyone, sounds like a real catch :).

    Rachel thanks for that idea my husband and I are having a proper first date this weekend after 5 years lol. As I previously said I had a 6 week old when we properly got together so it wasn't really an option then but we're going away this weekend just the 2 of us!!!! I'm sooooo excited hehe can you tell?

    Emma xXx
     
  17. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    Ahhh, that's lovely FYM. It can't be easy to keep the romance alive with a little one taking up all your time and energy - but it's great that you and your OH are taking time for yourselves... where are you going for your weekend? x
     
  18. futureyummymummy

    futureyummymummy Silver Member

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    3 little ones now ;) we're going to london and having a few treatments at the spa and doing some christmas shopping, maybe going to the theatre too. I'm so excited we have NEVER had any time away on our own :D.

    Emma xXx
     
  19. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    Ooooh, even trickier!!

    Festive Romantic London... ahh lovely - there is nothing nicer than wandering around London with the Christmas lights sparkling, mooching round Hamleys (LOVED IT as a kid) and Harrods (and probably only buying a £5 biro as a souvenir cos I'm always broke!!) and catching a show... brilliant!

    If you end up in the region of the Natural History Museum, they often have an ice rink out the front - went last year, and it was so lovely...

    Enjoy yourself :) x
     
  20. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    My Bond Party

    Hi all! Well, the party of the - well, month has been and gone and I'm shattered now!!!

    As promised here are a few pics - there aren't really any good full length ones of me - but I thought I would pop a couple up... including my sexy home made stick on tattoos... the OH!!... and just me in general...

    And I didn't lapse last night... although today has been tricky - I've felt so under the weather and craved 'substance' - but have cancelled a party and am staying in with locked doors and my book tonight... intend to get back on the horse and get to goal now - no more slip ups - only two stone to go.

    Blonde - thank you for your post on the other thread.. made perfect sense - it's the tough home straight... everyone, including me, is saying how great I look/feel... and tied with the time of year- it's a killer.

    Ok - pics it is... sorry they aren't the best :)

    Anna x
     

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  21. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

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    ^^^^ Oops, put these on the wrong thread!! Will re-post as a Bond Party thread. :) x
     
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