CONFESSION TIME - Please dont cheat

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by ladylite, 18 March 2008 Social URL.

  1. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    :break_diet:
    Well I have been a total whalley the last week, so at my weigh in tomoz may have put on. I have not been on a total binging spree, but definately need my hands or you know what slapped.:whoopass:

    I know I have had loads of stress but I think I will always attrack stress so I need to find a better way of coping other than turning to food. Although I have not buried myself in it like before, but it makes me stop concentrating and keeping my eye on the ball.:eek:

    This is a plee to everyone if you think of cheating :sign0009: DONT it is so hard to get back to that golden moment again and I am really struggling at the mo.

    Right confession over.:boohoo:
     
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  3. bexnkev

    bexnkev Silver Member

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    well done for confessing and at least you know you have to deal with your stress differently :) I hope you master it and things get back to the golden days... and I plan to heed your warning too :)
     
  4. lola123

    lola123 Silver Member

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    I admire your honesty, we are doing a diet that is so strict for a 100 + days and there are bound to be slip ups. The thing that scares me is coming out of ketosis and getting that hungry empty feeling back I hated that felt like the end of the world (drama queen) now I'm not having my last three packs till after Ive made the family dinner. A three course meal ha.
    Hang in there lady you can do it youve come this far.
     
  5. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Hey Lady....you alright? Don't go beating yourself up - as you say, you are not behaving as badly as you might have before LL, so that is progress.

    Don't you let this stress get you down....remember the ol duck...quack quack qauck...lol...let all that ***** roll off your back. Its not worth carrying with you if it is going to sabatoge YOUR dreams, which are far more important that any uppity committee's BS, etc. At then end of the day, when this is all behind you - then its past. And that is a good thing. If you stay strong through it - not only will it be passed, but you will be slimmer....so a double bonus. Do try and let it go, or to find distractions. I know that is SO much easier said then done. I do know that. But I want to see you rock it.

    You are at the half way point.....just a weee bit more, and you are over the pinnacle - the summit of your difficult climb. Then you can ride down, until you slide in at goal. You are doing so well. Please don;t let those boogers get the best of you. They are so not worth it.

    Chin up pup. Tomorrow is another day. Tonight, perhaps make yourself a list of some things you can do if you do feel you are starting to cave. Or some thoughts to remind you why you don't want to cave. Have a back up plan so you don't get caught out. Go feed your pony a carrot instead.....a carrot and a cuddle, thats gotta feel great. :) SOmething to take your mind off it - just be strong for those first few moments that are needed to distract yourself, and then you will rise above it all.

    Come on girlfirend. I know you can do it. :)
    XXX <hug>
     
  6. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Lady you've come in here and confessed all and that takes nerve and determination and you've got plenty of that .... you've utilised it to get you so far and you can use it again in the future.

    Just take it one day at a time and best of luv and luck for tomorrow xx
     
  7. Kate78

    Kate78 Full Member

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    Don't beat yourself up Lady, you've done so well, and there are going to be slip ups along the way. This is a whole new way of life/eatting, it's going to take a while to get on top of it.

    WI tonight, just go get and then try and get right back on track, put it behind you and move on. Don't be tough on yourself, just think about what caused you to slip up, if it was just the stress or something else, if you can identify the trigger and what you could have done differently it should help you cope in another way next time.

    Good luck getting back on track.

    Kate x
     
  8. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    Well I nearly gave up today, I am finding is so hard to get back on the wagon but it is so difficult.

    Sat down with hubby and daughter and explained that I thought I was wasting my/our money as I just wasnt sticking to it. Well to my surprise they were absolutely flabogastered. They were both up in arms and I dont think they had realised how bad I had got. I was secret eatingin the kitchen. They were really quite upset as I thinkthey are enjoying the new me.

    We to cut a long story short, they have both said they will put themselves out to get me back on track. I dont have to do the shopping or cook the dinners until I have overcome that first horrible week. I know I am always gonna have a problem with food and it will be with me for life, I am a true foodaholic but I would like to be able to get some control.

    I am very lucky to have the support and am defo gonna give it one more go.

    Sorry to bore you all but I always find writing it down makes it sink in more.
     
  9. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Oh Lady, that is wonderful you are getting the support at home as well as here. Its good they are willing to help.

    I hope you are not beating yourself up. Have you gone back and read some of your posts where you felt inspired - they were just oozing with confidence and optomism....maybe have a trawl back through and reread your words, and try to use them to boost you up again.

    You are half way through - don;t even think of stopping now. Have a good hard honest look back from when you started until today. Does it feel like a long time, or do you find yourelf amazed at how fast it went. If you realise, that is only as far as you will have to go again - then you have sorted out the loss, and just need to focus on the maintaining. Just think how ONDERFUl and successful you will feel when you get there. Please don't deprive yourself of that kind of happiness.

    You are doing bloody marvelous. You have had a lot of stressfull issues between the probs with your daughter, the AGM, etc., and look - you are still doing it!!! Don;t think you are a quitter misses....you are a strong gal, use that strength to get you through the last half of your journey.

    I bet you this is the first time you have got half way to goal on any diet? Well - that is you at the top, now ride down the other side of the mountain, and reward yourself by acheiving the dream you want, and you can have - but YOU need to allow youself to have it. To choose it.

    Come on Lady, chin up. With them shopping and cooking, you can refocus like you were at the very beginning of this. Get in there, nose down, reminding yourself you CAN do this.

    You can do it. I know you can. I have faith in you. You need to too. :)
    XXXXX
     
  10. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    Thanks BL you post was inspirational as usual, and yes thinking of it it is the first time I have got half way to goal, and it will be silly to give up. I think when I confessed to them and said I wanted to stop was because a felt guilty as not only was I cheating myself I was cheating them.

    Anyway I do feel positive and I will read my old posts as you say, especially the first week ones where we all struggle. I know once I get onto ketosis things will start flying again and the wonderful feeling of euphoria will return.

    Thanks
    x
     
  11. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    We are all here for you - don't feel you are cheating anyone. You are doing something very difficult and giving it your best efforts. There is no shame in that, at all. Be proud of what you have acheived before you see any shortcomings. The good far outweigh the bad. Hang tough. ;)
     
  12. minilady

    minilady Gold Member

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    Hi Lady

    You're family sound wonderfully supportive:) It's hard to admit that you have been struggling to a support group such as mins let alone face to face to your loved ones. But you have proved that in most cases it's probably the best thing you could do.

    I'd like to thank you as reading this has opened my eyes. I've recently posted a few things about my own food demons which has been hard for me to do. My H dosent know how I feel about food or how I use food. Maybe if I can find it in me to be as brave as you, he may be able to help.

    I really hope that you've been spurred on by their support. You have come so far and are a great inspiration for other newer followers of VLCD's, you really deserve to acheive your goals.

    Hope you have a great Easter weekend:)

    Tracey
    x
     
  13. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    I have to admit that I know deep down the only person I am cheating is myself.

    My daughter (by the way we are getting on sooooo much better lately) just told me that her friend, who is a boy, just texted her and hadnt seen me without my big horsey coat on, and said that I was gob smacked and that I look amazing. That has given me a bit boost.

    In our session this week we talked about how some of us will go on and still have food demons, just like an alcoholic does. That made me feel better as I was beginning to think that I was the only one who was never gonna be completely cured. I know I wont be completely cured but I am hoping that I will be able to find ways of coping with it. LL, I think has and will give me the tools to do this.
     
  14. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Oh my gosh Lady - you are so not the only one!! I KNOW the maintaining part of this is going to be a real struggle - hareder then the losing, and it scares me too!!! I think the comparison to an alcholoic is very apt in many ways!! you are not alone!!
     
  15. Tange

    Tange Silver Member

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    Hi Lady
    I have reread this thread and I so needed it today, i have had the :devilangel: all day. I was so positive this morning but I have not kept myself busy and the boredom has brought out all these feelings and thoughts and pathetically all about food.

    Its been good to read this, and I so can relate to your secret eating I have done that all my life. And seeing I am alone this weekend it would be so easy. I have spent the last hour reading the success stories and looking at the pics. Thankfully I have not strayed I will admit to sniffing the cheese but then the angel thankfully won over the devil. (reminds me of a Chris de Burgh song)

    Lady thanks for being so honest on here its helped me. I am glad your family is so supportive.
    I will stay around and keep my fingers on the keyboard maybe that will help. I should actually look at my pics too that will motivate me.
    Thanks again Lady, your experience is helping me loads.
     
  16. minilady

    minilady Gold Member

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    In our session this week we talked about how some of us will go on and still have food demons, just like an alcoholic does. That made me feel better as I was beginning to think that I was the only one who was never gonna be completely cured. I know I wont be completely cured but I am hoping that I will be able to find ways of coping with it. LL, I think has and will give me the tools to do this.[/quote]

    I think that it will be more than some of you, most of us that have gotten overweight or have had weight issues for many years and yoyo'd definately have food demons, which unfortunately don't disappear once you are slim. I had hoped by being slim, I'd be less depressed and therefore not rely on food anymore to stifle emotions. What I hadn't realised was that my depression and sadness wasn't about being overweight at all, I'd just subconsciously chosen to blame my weight issues for all my emotional problems. Now I don't have the weight to hide behind I've got to face the real reasons I'm unhappy. It's hard but something I know I'll do eventually.

    Maintaining is a double edged sword. On the one hand it's wonderful, you feel healthy, have more self esteem, are comfortable in clothes, look better etc. etc. On the other hand it's scary having to face any low points in your week knowing that if you behave how you would of pre diet by eating to make yourself feel better/worse then you could lose the control you feel you've gained throught losing the weight in the first place.

    Sorry I've rambled on again:eek:

    Tracey
    x
     
  17. Alibongo

    Alibongo Happily pro pointing!

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    I have had a serious secret eating problem since I was a teenager. However, I seem to be dealing with it very well on RTM, I haven't done any secret eating at all.
    I seem to have cracked it for now, but will see as time goes on. I am a bit concerned about when the RTM program finishes and I go it alone, I am on week 8 so not too long to go.
    My LLC did the whole session on secret eating this week which was very useful for me. The do still address a lot of issues during the management sessions.
     
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  19. Donnalou86

    Donnalou86 Striving for slimness

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    Hi ladylite just thought I'd pop in and offer some words of support. As the others have said don't go beating yourself up for this bump in the road, you have done absolutely fantastic! (your photos are amazing!!) None of us are angels and there's always going to be blips along the way just stick in there cos you've proved you can do it. Really hope you're feeling better soon x
     
  20. ladylite

    ladylite Gold Member

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    :break_diet:Well I am sorry to say it is not longer a bump its a crater. :mad: I feel awful, guilty, fed up and not sure what to do. Not even sure if I should stop for a while, perhaps do a CD/750. I seem to be good all day and then wallop off I go, eating in secret now.

    I wouldnt mind if I was starving but its just like some form of self sabotage and I cant seem to get myself out of it. I know I shouldnt but I actually feel a bit of a freak. I read all your threads and how well you are doing and I know that will happen to me if I was just strong enough, but I cant seem to tell my inner brain, if you know what I mean.

    I have always been as struggler since reaching Development its as if it is all over, but the fact is I know I will put it all back on again and I am far from a healthy bmi, and I am binge eating not really even eating anything nice or planned.

    Has anyone got a magic wand I can borrow. :cool:

    Just for info in case you think I am leaving you I am away from tomorrow, may be able to get on first thing, but wont be back on til Monday. Dont wont you all worrying about me.

    It is my WI tonight and I need to speak to my LLC but she is very strick and will tell me it is up to me. Dreading it again.

    I am totally confused as to what to do.:confused:
     
  21. Tange

    Tange Silver Member

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    Oh Lady I feel for you I really do. I know how hard it is. I have not been perfect myself. My saving grace is my scale when I saw the damage I did I had a very long hard talk to myself. And on the way home last night I even had to have a full on argument with myself.
    I think you are right in having a chat with your LLC, and if she is hard on you and not supportive then maybe you should think of trying CD. I do wish I could wave a magic wand for you.
    Why not set yourself small goals. Or see if you can find some alternative counselling.
    Thinking of you and sending you good vibes. And a big hug. Hang in there.
     
  22. Slimseaa

    Slimseaa Silver Member

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    LadyLite, don't worry! You have done sooooo well and you still have the determination inside that u still want to carry on losing weight! At least you know what ur behaviour is like and haev admitted to it, u know what u have done is wrong here and there and thast the best thing, that u want to improve the situation and not wanting to give up. Don't get down about it, at least u haven't quitted the diet totally, that says something :)
     
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