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DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN....!!!

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Mich, 7 February 2007 Social URL.

  1. Mich

    Mich Taking Back Control...!!!

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    DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS



    40-ish - 49
    Adventurous - Slept with everyone
    Athletic - No tits
    Average looking - Ugly
    Beautiful - Pathological liar
    Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
    Emotionally secure - On medication
    Feminist - Fat
    Free spirit - Junkie
    Friendship first - Former very *friendly* person
    Fun - Annoying
    New Age - Body hair in the wrong places
    Old-fashioned - No BJs
    Open-minded - Desperate
    Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing
    Passionate - Sloppy drunk
    Professional - *****
    Voluptuous - Very Fat
    Large frame - Hugely Fat
    Wants Soul mate - Stalker

    WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
    1. Yes = No
    2. No = Yes
    3. Maybe =No
    4. We need = I want
    5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
    6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
    7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
    8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
    9. I am not upset =Of course I am you moron!
    10. You're certainly attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?

    MEN'S ENGLISH
    1. I am hungry = I am hungry
    2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
    3. I am tired = I am tired
    4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
    5. I love you = let's have sex now
    6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
    7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
    8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
    9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
    10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
    11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit I'm gay


    A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.

    For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features.

    And when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside



    Me - I'm an old-fashioned, outgoing, passionate, voluptious woman............LOL!!!!:eek: :eek: :D :D
     
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  3. sonkie

    sonkie Gold Member

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    ROFL....PMSL...LOL
     
  4. Roosters

    Roosters Silver Member

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    lol - that's excellent!!
     
  5. tootsie

    tootsie Silver Member

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    Love it, just sent it to my OH xx
     
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