need to feel like 'me' again...

[xjemloux]

hiya guys right im 26, single mum to 5 year old twin boys & a now nearly 8 month old boy, I have always been 'bigger' but looking back on pictures of myself I was never actually fat during teens despite people constant name calling. Weight has always been an issue but nowhere near as big an issue as it is now. At some points in my life I have felt comfortable with who I am and despite the fact that the majority of people have still insisted im a fat this and a fat that I didn't care at the time as I was happy and comfortable with me. I have lost myself a bit though I am now at my biggest ever, I am now feeling incredibly uncomfortable with myself, losing all my confidence despite having this bubbly brash front about me and I want to start feeling comfortable again and getting my confidence back. I've decided to come on here for support from people other than 'my mum' people who are in the same boat or have been, for the support and positivity that I need to get up off my backside now and do something about it. I am at a point now where I am just not active which is really not helping, despite being the 'bigger one' before I have always been active taking part in martial arts, playing netball and walking at a good pace everywhere, even doing fitness dvds at home, I have lost all motivation, after nearly losing my baby the day I brought him home from hospital, struggling on my own a bit with the children ive lost myself in big giant rut which I need to get myself out of. No matter how hard I need to get off my bum at least once a day (apart from usual stuff I do anyway) and actually partake in some form of exercise. Any messages with tips, exercise, positive words would be greatly appreciated as I am starting to lose my self worth and need this now to get myself feeling like me again..