what do you do when SW doesn't work?

[sockmonkey]

I am still unclear as to whether your wife knows we are talking about her. I am not going to make any further contribution until I know that.

I agree. Partly because it seems nasty to talk about someone behind their back. Partly because SHE is the one who needs to take control of her own diet if any weight loss is ever going to stick. She is going to know what she is eating, she is the one who is going to know what questions she needs to ask. If this is all about her, surely it makes more sense that she speaks to us all directly? OP it is not YOU who needs to learn about A and B choices, it is your wife.

And because all to often in relationships, food, weight, and diets are used as weapons. I have seen and experienced relationships where food is used to control people. While I'm not for one moment claiming that this is the case here, but I don't see why OP doesn't ask his wife to speak to the forum directly.

 

[MadameLaMinx]

I think the best thing you can do here, for both of you, is join a group, get the most up to date information - and consider it a fresh start. There is lots in terms of your sample menu that would indicate that the plan isn't quite being adhered to as it needs to be to be effective - for example if the cottage cheese portion is not a low fat variety, and obviously you don't have control over the portion size, little things like that can all add up to quite a lot.

We of course are happy to provide support and advice about anything we can but the best way to get focussed is to go to at least one class- preferably more, because it helps to keep focus, and if you both go then it will benefit both of you because you will have up to date and accurate information to refer to- and if at least one of you continues as a member, then you have access to the online resources too so can easily check syn values as you need them!

 

[sockmonkey]

Sorry, my post crossed with several of the others.

I don't think you need to lose enough to be able to join group, but it sounds as if your wife (what is her name? we can't just keep calling her 'your wife'!) would benefit, in terms of up to date info, cameraderie and motivation.

 

[snuggle69]

Maybe like several on us here, she secretly binges and he isnt even aware, its taken me a long time to admit to the fact I used to do that, and on very rare occasions still do.

 

[downsizingmycurves]

Yes, she knows I've got the books out and am asking on a forum for advice. We discussed it yesterday evening and she was pleased I am learning about SW.

I haven't shown her the forum responses but we are considering joining bodyoptimise.com. Does anyone have any experience of this?

Have you read this thread which has lots of up to date info:

http://www.minimins.com/slimming-wo...d-advice-new-comers-including-extra-easy.html

As for Body Optimise, one of our biggest losers on here (Cocktail Princess) lost her weight that way:

Our Members - Claire Pratt - bodyOptimise

 

[Stefanie]

I do body optimise, 3 months for £60 which I think is reasonable. It's good you are learning about sw, but get your wife/partner on here to chat on the forum herself, it will help her understand more, much more than hearing it second hand....plus it is a great support on here for her and will definitely give her the incentive she needs. x

 

[fillymum]

Forgive me friends but after reading all your brilliant, honest and genuine replies My gut feeling is we are all wasting our time.

If this mans wife is so keen to lose weight let her get on here. I would be so cross if my husband was so controlling he had to do it for me.

Sorry OP, I have said my piece.

 

[jaylou]

Sue I think you are quite correct - the majority of my suggestions, and that of others, have been ignored!

 

[fillymum]

Time to draw a line under it !!!

 

[Maximus]

Such a shame really, but in order to lose weight, you have to want to! - the OP never answered what size/weight portions were being used. It is clearly way more than the, for example 250-300g potato per person, and free foods are not really unlimited like the superfree ones - which was mentioned more than once.

Still, it's nice to know we all care and can offer help, but it seems come hell or high water going to class is clearly not an option.

Still, their loss (or not as the case may be). Buying a games machine or paying for an online subscription will not replace going to group and getting some "real exercise".

Guy in my group got his 10st sticker yesterday - yes 10st in little more than 9 months - he thinks it works!

I too will bow out now as it may turn sour:wave_cry:

To the original poster and your dear wife, I hope you find what you're looking for, but joining a group will reward you much greater than you'd imagine. I genuinely wish you luck.

Steve

 

[avisk]

Forgive me friends but after reading all your brilliant, honest and genuine replies My gut feeling is we are all wasting our time.

If this mans wife is so keen to lose weight let her get on here. I would be so cross if my husband was so controlling he had to do it for me.

Sorry OP, I have said my piece.

You are right, I quite agree. Something here is not quite right - even a bit creepy.

If I were this man's wife I would be furious to think he was discussing me with a load of strangers behind my back!