A little bit scared

green eyed monster

Gold Member
Might sound strange, but I feel comfortable putting my thoughts on here to share.

I put on 4 stone with my eldest son 16 years ago and I still have it, plus some and have battled to lose this weight and failed so many times over the years I'd almost resigned myself to being big forever,

But now I can actually see I could succeed in this and it terrifies me.... I don't know how to be thin again. I don't really know what I'm trying to say here, I hope someone will share these thoughts or maybe I need a poke with a sensible stick lol


I buy clothes purely because they fit, I have no sense of fashion or style, I wouldn't know where to start to be honest. A part of me thinks that I'm too old for all this stuff, but then is 33 too old to be restyled?? I don't know.


Im probably just being a fraggle but thanks for listening xxxxx
 
Wow...33, too old!!!? C'mon ......that makes me feel ancient at 46!! LoL

Don't forget, this isn't going to happen overnight so you will have chance to adapt. It's not like you are going to wake up tomorrow thin ( ha, if only! )
I have found that when I am slimmer, I love clothes shopping but when I gain weight, I shy away from it. It will come back to you I'm sure.....you won't be able to stop yourself shopping!
 
Thanks for the reply lentil x

Think I'm just having a moment lol

Yeah, if only it would happen overnight!
 
33 is definitely not to old for a restyle! I'm 37!

Do you think you use your weight as an excuse when you don't look as good as you would like, and worry that when you're slim you'll have no excuse not to look good? That they're will be pressure to look stylish or fashionable and you'll no longer be able to pass it off with "well they don't make clothes like that in my size"? I may be way off the mark there, but it's something I used to worry about. Then I found that if I feel good, I look good. And losing weight makes me feel amazing.

You will find your way hun, and if you're worried about it, why not make one of your rewards for getting to a certain target a session with a personal shopper?

I promise though that if you feel fabulous, you'll look fabulous, whatever your style! :)
 
I know exactly how you are feeling. I feel the same. I am scared of trying new styles, I look at them longingly then turn away because I just wouldn't know how to carry them off. Think we need a fairy godmother to show us the way and tell us we are beautiful in our own right. X X
 
I definitely don't think 33 is too old! Don't think of it as a re-style if that thought frightens you, think of it as being able to walk into a clothes shop (any clothes shop not just the frumpy ones that cater for plus sizes, the skinny Minnie ones too!) and being able to enjoy the experience of trying on outfits until you find styles, colours and looks that you like, rather than settling for anything just because it fits and hides the bits you want to hide.
I too have several stone to lose. I will be 40 in October and am determined to slim down and get healthy before I reach that milestone! We've all heard it before... Don't want to be fat and forty!
 
You are all very lovely.

Clair, I will think I look lovely and feel great at the time but looking at photos afterwards makes me wonder why I left the house.
 
Crickey if 33 is old I better gave rethink cos I'm 34 this year Hahahaha.

Seriously thou I know exactly where your coming from hun. I don't have masses to lose but what I do have to lose is going to make a difference. At the moment I feel very 'mum-sy' and wish I looked like a yummy mummy. I know the weight loss will give me the better shape but I don't know if I can pull it off.

I really haven't got a clue where to start because mum-sy style is comfortable but I actually feel old :( it's a catch 22

I know it probably doesn't help but wanted to show you're not alone
 
What are you worried about? You think your to old naaa I'm 71 and I have got back my love of clothes so if I can do it I'm darn sure you can :)
 
A lot of young ladies on here going on about age - it is determination! Kay, you can do whatever you put your mind too! We are all in the same boat - for some of us it will take a long time to get to how we want to be... But we are heading the right way! Some weeks may not be as good as others... but we are human at the end of the day! I think i speak for everyone on here when i say no matter what problems you are facing, no matter what kind of week your having... there will always be someone on here to speak too! All you need is encouragement! And slowly but surely we will get there!

Liam x
 
Hun please don't worry. We are all in the same boat of trying to find new styles to go with our new shapes. I know I've gotten it (hilariously!) wrong once or twice in my overenthusiasm "wow I can fit into that!!"

You will look fine, hopefully your 'new me' photos will prove it to you. And you will feel so much happier and healthier, and that will shine through too :)
 
I feel the same, I'm 24 but I have never been slim so heavy is all I've ever known! dressing to hide and just because it fits is all I know. So this fear is definitely something you're not alone in, I guess we'll all just have to figure it out together!

Whatever happens, it'll be worth it. All the best things in life start out being terrifying, they're scary because they matter!

xxxxxxx
 
Thank you for all your replies.

Xxxx
 
You know, whatever people say, a change, even a positive one, can be scary. We all get in a comfort bubble. It may not be what we want but it's what we know. Take me starting a job 5 weeks ago. Yes it's positive, yes it's what I have been aiming towards, but having not worked for 11 years (due to mental health issues and then having my little one) it was very frightening to start even my 10hr a week job. I hated being unemployed, I wanted a job. But it still scared me silly.

i can say the same thing about dieting. I have been big all my life and morbidly obese for over 10 years. I hate it but it's what I know. I want to be slim but part of me is frightened about that change. I sure as anything don't know a thing about fashion lol and what are people's expectations going to be of me when I loose weight? If I'm totally honest I do use my weight as a reason not to do things that make me feel uncomfortable. Social situations, and the like. So, if that excuse isn't there anymore what then?
also will I still be me? Well yes the rational side of me knows I'll be me. hopefully a happier and healthier me. But it's a jump into the unknown and it's still frightening.

the good thing as already pointed out is that weight loss doesn't happen overnight so we have a chance to adjust to our new selves and new bodies and maybe even new found love of clothes lol. It would be nice I think, but it's been sooooooo long since I remember being able to pick clothes in any shop AND feel good about what I look like in those clothes that I stopped caring and struggle to imagine what it would be like to do this.

HOWEVER lets do this. Feel the fear and do it anyway as they say. I'm 33 too. Maybe we should buddy up, and get through this together. I'm serious! If you live near perhaps we can be clueless together and go clothes shopping too lol.

Goodness knows I need support for this and we can bolster each other up, & keep each other going :)

go go for it hun. My job that petrified me? I love it!!! We can learn to be slim together x
 
You know, whatever people say, a change, even a positive one, can be scary. We all get in a comfort bubble. It may not be what we want but it's what we know. Take me starting a job 5 weeks ago. Yes it's positive, yes it's what I have been aiming towards, but having not worked for 11 years (due to mental health issues and then having my little one) it was very frightening to start even my 10hr a week job. I hated being unemployed, I wanted a job. But it still scared me silly.

i can say the same thing about dieting. I have been big all my life and morbidly obese for over 10 years. I hate it but it's what I know. I want to be slim but part of me is frightened about that change. I sure as anything don't know a thing about fashion lol and what are people's expectations going to be of me when I loose weight? If I'm totally honest I do use my weight as a reason not to do things that make me feel uncomfortable. Social situations, and the like. So, if that excuse isn't there anymore what then?
also will I still be me? Well yes the rational side of me knows I'll be me. hopefully a happier and healthier me. But it's a jump into the unknown and it's still frightening.

the good thing as already pointed out is that weight loss doesn't happen overnight so we have a chance to adjust to our new selves and new bodies and maybe even new found love of clothes lol. It would be nice I think, but it's been sooooooo long since I remember being able to pick clothes in any shop AND feel good about what I look like in those clothes that I stopped caring and struggle to imagine what it would be like to do this.

HOWEVER lets do this. Feel the fear and do it anyway as they say. I'm 33 too. Maybe we should buddy up, and get through this together. I'm serious! If you live near perhaps we can be clueless together and go clothes shopping too lol.

Goodness knows I need support for this and we can bolster each other up, & keep each other going :)

go go for it hun. My job that petrified me? I love it!!! We can learn to be slim together x


This is the sweetest loveliest post,thank you.


Totally agree about what you said about ' will I still be me', that's how I feel too.

Of course I will be here for support for you xx
 
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