Can I do this? Am I ever going to get there?

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by lighterlifeclaire, 4 March 2008 Social URL.

  1. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    OK, I've been quiet lately... really been struggling and trying to work out a new counsellor etc etc... I've got a weigh in tomorrow, and according to home scales I've put on 6lbs (glycogen I imagine)

    I went gym today and felt good afterwards... but yet again I feel into the food hole... and ate as soon as I got home.

    I guess I might just be having a bad day, but seeing the increase on the home scales, and just knowing that I am failing everyday just makes me wonder if I am ever going to do this... I'm not even half way there, despite losing 5 stone... :cry:

    I don't know what to do... I need to find a new counsellor... someone who explains CBT, thought records and everything else properly. Until then, I just feel like I can't motivate myself to get back on track.

    I called a new counsellor today, but got an answer phone - am waiting for her to return my call. Also spoke to a CDC today because I got too impatient and just want to do ANYTHING but after speaking to him, I didn't like the sound of CD.

    :confused::confused::confused::confused::confused::confused::confused: I don't know what to do :wave_cry:
     
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  3. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Oh hon. Sorry you are struggling again. What do you think is happening, that is distracting you from your focus. There must be something there that is blocking your will to get back on track like you were before....proof you CAN do it. Any ideas? Is it boredom? Or fear of something? Is it worry that you feel you haven't really "gotten it" yet in counseling - because I have those fears too!!

    I really want to see you get back on track Claire. Its such a brilliant opportunity for you to nip this in the bud at a very early stage of your life. BELIEVE ME - you will be SO GLAD you did it. There ain't enough stacks of bibles to swear that fact on if that makes any difference!!

    Can we do anything to help?

    I really want to see you succeed. Please don;t beat yourself up - that will only make you feel bad about yourself - and what you need to do now is be kind to yourself, and be honest with yourself, and face whatever it is head on.

    Just remember - if you really do want this - to be free from weight and to change your life and your future, you can. But you need to make that decision, and promise to yourself.

    You know we are here for you kiddo.

    XXX
     
  4. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    I REALLY want to continue. I have no idea about the first 100 days so want to re-do it... The idea is (how it wll work in my head) is that I will find a new counsellor and attend a foundation class from day 1. Lose another 5stone ish (in that 100 days) and then start RtM to learn healthy eating, even though I will still be overweight, but then gradually lose the last part of the weight gradually and slowly.

    I guess its just being tht bit inbetween right now... I feel like I don't have a counsellor, or a group... and motivating myself is so difficult.
     
  5. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    I can understand that and a new LLC is definately the best way forward!! In the interim, just practice what yo have learned so far....and you have us for support!!! :) You kow that!! Hopefully it won't be much longer and you will be back in a good group getting the support from an LLC that you can benefit from!!

    Hang in there - you will get there!!! I know you want to continue, and I know you will. :)

    Maybe you should get a couple of LL magazines to be reading in the interim - might keep your mind on it. I just read my first one last night and it was very interesting!!

    Keep posting - don't go quiet. We are all in this together and we can help!! ;) :)

    X
     
  6. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    OK... If I write it down I will probably feel more obliged to do it... From this point onwards... I will stick with shakes... atleast until my session tomorrow... and if I can do it until then I know I can do it for longer. I don't know why I need to try and tell myself I can do it... I done 100 days so of course I can do it.
     
  7. Dancing

    Dancing Gold Member

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    I think you have been affected by your incompetent LLC and your struggle to find another one. Don't beat yourself up about your struggle. The important thing is your desire to keep going - and you clearly have that. Remember you only fail if you stop trying.

    I'm interested about your comment re. CD - as I moved to it. Would you share what it was about your conversation with the CDC that put you off it?
     
  8. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    ... I remember crying after coming out of my 4th day pop-in when I first started because I had lost 8lbs and was over the moon.... I want that feeling back :(
     
  9. Frejja

    Frejja Silver Member

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    Hi Claire

    I know it seems insurmountable just now but think back to when you started, losing 5 stone would have been just a far off dream and now it's a reality!

    Don't lose motivation, you are going to be a tall skinny supermodel if you keep going...
     
  10. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    The diet itself is appealing, obv because its pretty much the same.

    However, the CDC I spoke to said that I could only see him probably once a fortnight... he was really friendly and was in no rush to get off the phone and said he would always be there for support via the phone... But basically, the situation would be fortnightly, and ideally, he would prefer it if I had someone else who would join with me so that he could kill two birds with one stone when visiting?? I asked what he meant by visiting because I was under the impression most CDC's work from their home.. and he said he was "mobile" and travels to the clients house...

    ...... Being 21... and living with mum and brother... I wouldn't like to discuss weight issues and diet stuff in my house. I have never discussed it up until now... only ever told them how much I lose each week... and there isn't really privacy in my house to accomodate that.

    I'm sure he is a really nice CDC ... but the set up just isn't for me.

    How are you finding CD, Dancing? x
     
  11. Dancing

    Dancing Gold Member

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    Well, you do have to find one that suits you - mine encouraged me to come each week and works from home but will go to clients home if it suits them. I can see why you wouldn't want him coming to you. But believe me, not all CDCs operate that way. So it was more the CDC that didn't appeal, not CD itself.

    CD is great for me. I'm nearing my healthy BMI now (1 stone 3lbs to go) so am due to start moving up the plans soon (reintroducing food). I've been pondering whether or not to stick with CD to do that or to return to LL to do RtM. I'd almost decided on returning to LL because I liked how you could identify trigger foods etc. However, having got feedback from someone doing really well on CD, I now understand that the way CD reintroduces the food also allows you to easily identify your trigger foods. So, I think I'm going to stick with CD all the way to the end. I'll decide for sure next week.

    Can I say, don't close the door on CD entirely - keep it as an option (on the condition you find a CDC that suits you) incase you don't manage to find a better LLC. Definitely don't stay with the one you have.

    Just keep picking yourself up, girl. You will get there. Learn from each event rather than beating yourself up and you will be all the stronger for it. I find it helped me to write down here what it is I intended to do so hope you doing the same helps you to.. .... I struggled after my planned break but am well and truly back in the zone now. So you can be too.
     
  12. lola123

    lola123 Silver Member

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    Just had a look at your pictures claire and you look amazing, don't give up now you have come so far and you will be slim this summer, good luck you can do it.
     
  13. x-Katie-x

    x-Katie-x Gold Member

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    Claire what is the distance between you and your next LLC? Is it do-able? If so then I really think you need to follow that path asap or find a CD counsellor who is close who offers the one to one to suit your needs.

    I think you are feeling the way you feel because of your downhill relationship with your current LLC so that you don't feel like you can go on with this ---- but I'd urge you to stick with the diet while you are looking for a new counsellor, as anything you gain now is something that you'll have to lose after. If you can remain focussed while you find one then all the better.

    We're all here for you and will give you all the support you want, but we can only do that if you let us know it's needed. You've done amazingly up to now and you can continue to do so xxx
     
  14. youcandoit

    youcandoit Banned

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    it was that chicken sandwich that did it!!!!
     
  15. Dancing

    Dancing Gold Member

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    reread your original post. You are not failing every day - please try to change your mindset. You are succeeding at starting again and not giving up entirely. It might sound like I'm just playing with words but it is so important to look at the positive. It isn't glossing over the perceived negative.

    Many of us tend to look at what we fail to achieve, how much we still have to do, where we lack, etc, etc. When there is so much to celebrate in what we achieve. I'm guilty of the first in many aspects of my life but I'm learning to focus on what I CAN do and what I AM DOING. It makes a huge difference. Go give yourself a good pep talk.
     
  16. lighterlifeclaire

    lighterlifeclaire Silver Member

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    Oh there have been plenty of those........ :eek:
     
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