comfort eating - i need your help

[lizzi]

Hey guys and girls,

Got a bit of a problem...I do well for a while, thn something happens and I just binge eat. I dont know what to do about it, it's driving me mad. It's getting out of hand, I know it is, but I jsut don't know how to stop. I had a bit of a rough night last night, got back home and ended up eating chocolate spread out of the jar with a spoon because there was nothing else to eat. I really don't know what to do...help me please!!xx

 

[STRIDE]

Hi Just read you post and you mainly answered your own question in the fact that you didnt have anything healthy in the house to eat when you needed it most......

 

[rhuba]

i think what she meant was that there was no other rubbish. when you get the urge to binge like that and there's nothing binge-worthy, you have to create something that will satisfy the craving for unhealthy food. i've done things like that before. it makes you feel horrendous afterwards. so embarrassed! i always used to think what would i do if someone caught me in the throws of a nutella binge! chocolate smeared across my face etc.

i think the best thing to do is to try and get to the root of why you felt you needed it so much. i'm still trying to figure out what triggers my binge mentality, and i'm pretty sure it's when i feel down and when i'm really tired. as if a massive bar of choc will perk me up a bit. it never does.

it's good that you're learning your behaviour patterns before they get too out of control. they can start getting dangerous. i have never been massively overweight, but i was scared that i would lose control and not be able to stop myself.

good luck to you miss - have a shufties around the forums as there are a lot of people who have trouble with comfort eating to supress feelings. i think reading up on it may help you pinpoint what triggers your binges, as well as finding out diversionary tactics, as that's the key to stopping them.

good luck hun xx

 

[sandyk]

Yep. Big jar of nutella + spoon + emotional/frustrating day….certainly been there. Kinda helps that I don’t buy nutella and or anything similarly luscious anymore, but that’s more of a preventative measure and doesn’t really get to the root of it…

Like Rhuba I’ve never been that overweight, but for years now I’ve been trying to shift around a stone, stone and a half….I always get to the point of losing say 6 or 7 lbs then BINGE!…..and right back to where we started. And every time it’s happened it’s been down to some emotional or frustrated episode getting the better of me, and I end up with my face in a bowl full of carte d’or…

So I read a book recently that has kinda made me think a bit more before I start to lose it in that way – The Beck Diet…. It’s based on a cognitive behavioural therapy approach to weight loss…changing damaging thoughts and hence behaviours. There’s loads more to it that I won’t go into here, but she recommends writing out ‘Response Cards’ that you would read a couple times a day or when your feeling particularly stressed out and would normally turn to food for comfort. The idea is to basically brainwash yourself with positive messages geared towards changing your damaging eating habits. I wrote out a few of them on flashcards and carry them around in my purse, and I honestly think they’ve helped me on a number of occasions. It might seem a bit wishy washy to some of you but I’ll write out a few below that I felt addressed my particular eating quirks – emotional eating; panicking about feeling even slightly hungry and grabbing anything in sight (anyone else have this one?); and feeling guilty about leaving food on my plate – and I hope they might help some of you fellow strugglers.

‘Emotions are not an emergency. I don’t have to eat. I can tolerate this feeling. Eating won’t solve this problem but will only make things worse because then I’ll have 2 problems: the original one, plus feeling guilty, discouraged and worried that I may have gained weight’

‘Hunger is never an emergency. It’s only mildly uncomfortable. I can tolerate it. It will come and go’

‘Extra food will always go to waste, either in the bin or in my body’

….and one last powerful one

‘I’m choosing to say NO CHOICE. If I want to lose weight, I have to do what I need to do, not what I feel like doing.’

Happy brainwashing!

 

[lizzi]

Thanks guys, that's been really helpful! Sandy, you're not the first person to mention that book, I'll look it up and give it a go. But I"m exactly like you, I need to lose a stone and a half to get to the weight I was happy at before I put on all the weight again, but I tend to lose 5 or 6 lbs, then something goes wrong, my confidence hits rock bottom and I'm headfirst into a jar of nutella, or a bag of m&ms. I know my triggers are when I'm tired, or feeling down- or if something's knocked my confidence. I'm hoping next year with a change of housemates I'll be happier, because that's been a huge factor in my binging this year, but I need to sort it now really- and that will still only be a temporary measure, as soon as I have a confidence knock again it can quite easily slip!

oh, and on the food- sort of a bit of both. I didn't have anything else unhealthy, no. But I didn't have a huge amount of the healthy food

STRIDE: The thing is, I could have had a fridge full of healthy food - but I would have still reached for the nutella on that occasion. And the thing is, I bought it on a bad day - and usually if I do that, I throw things away after I've "come to my senses" half way through a binge. But that time for some reason I didn't, and when I got home on monday night I went straight for it and grabbed a spoon then locked myself in my room. Disgsting? Yes. could I sleep that night? No. Did I wake up with a chocolate hangover? Yep. Did I learn my lesson? No.

Hmm. I'll try the book! (and if I slip back into it, I'm calling the uni counciller when I get back in September)

 

[Scarlet Daisy]

I've been there. Eating like that isn't about "comfort" or hunger is it? To me it feels more like self-harm at worst and "stuffing down emotions" at best. Don't sabotage yourself, before you open the jar, ask yourself if this is really the person you want to be. I do that and then eat one of those silly little apples that Asda market at kids, instead. Hehe. Seems to work.

I'm sorry your housemates are making you unhappy and I think getting help from the Uni is a great idea. *hug* I wish I could do more.

Finally, CBT is awesome, so I'm going to get that book myself, thanks for the heads up sandyk!

 

[AnneJ66]

hi, i posted a very similar post yesterday as i am also a binge eater. asked if anyone had tried hypnotherapy as i am THAT desperate for an answer. im going to try the paul mc kenna book and dvd 'i can make you thin', was told by a couple of ladies on the cd forum that it really helped them so iv ordered a copy and looking forward to it arriving. keep you posted! x