Dieter's Prayer

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by Walter Bishop, 4 October 2011 Social URL.

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  1. Walter Bishop

    Walter Bishop Full Member

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    Slimming World
    This song made me smile: :)

    Lord, won't you help me?
    It's that time of year.
    Winter has come and gone.
    Springtime is here.
    In this season of flesh,
    Won't you show that you care?
    Lord, won't you heed
    This dieter's prayer.

    Teach me tonight
    To love cottage cheese,
    Grapefruit and celery,
    Lord, if you please.
    Make me believe
    That tofu's a food,
    And not something you made up
    When you were in a bad mood.

    Lord, won't you help me?
    Show that you care.

    Lord, won't you heed
    This dieter's prayer.
    Make me believe
    That ice cream's just awful,
    That the devil is hiding
    Inside every waffle.
    That mayonnaise is nothing
    But a communist plot.
    That broccoli is good for you
    And chocolate is not.

    Keep me away
    From the refrigerator door
    When life is a trial
    And love is a bore.
    Save me from nachos,
    And tacos and chips,
    For what goes in my mouth
    Always lands on my hips.

    Oh, pizza, oh pasta,
    Oh, popcorn, oh, pork!
    Get thee behind me
    Oh, knife and oh, fork.
    And chicken fried steak
    From the deepest of south...

    Oh, Lord, if you love me,
    Won't you please shut my mouth?

    Oh, Lord, do you hear me?
    Honk if you're there.
    Lord, won't you heed...
    You know my need...
    Oh, Lord, won't you heed
    This dieter's prayer?

    Amanda McBroom
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