How shallow but how great!

[Thornhill Cate]

Hi, I'm back. Have been a bit off piste since the start of the school Easter hols and have found it hard to get back on track. What is it about chocolate in an egg shape? Why could I so easily resist it as a bar for so long but the minute all those eggs arrived in the house I was lost. Anyway, no major damage done - still getting into my 14s - and am off to the pharmacy tomorrow intending to get going again and shift my last 1.5-2 stone in time for the school summer hols. In a moment of complete madness I've also ordered a DVD collection called Hip Hop Abs at huge expense so am waiting for this to arrive. Let's just hope I get further than just watching it! It looks like fun though so fingers crossed.

Now to why I'm feeling unashamedly shallow. My ex brother-in-law and his wife dropped in to see me today. They were driving back from Pembrokeshire to London and stopped off in Cardiff for an hour to have a quick coffee and a catch up. When they texted to ask if it would be OK my first thought, rather tragically, was "Thank God I'm slim". How shallow it that? They haven't seen me for five years and I'm much slimmer now than I was then and, of course, I have been even heavier in that time. If I'm honest, if they'd asked to pop in three and half months ago I'd probably have made up some excuse to avoid seeing them. How sad is that? I have to say in their defence that they wouldn't have been judging me - they're not the type. My brother-in-law has a right pot belly, nurtured over many years of real ale appreciation, and his wife has always been on the large side, but I just knew they would want to take photos and I know that my ex will see these at some point and I am just so relieved that I look as good as I do now, although I say so myself. Three and a half months ago it would have been a totally different story. I would have hated him to see photos of what I looked like then. And then the best bit - they showed me some pics of my ex and he hasn't aged as well as me at all. I felt quite smug. Sad and pathetic I know as we split up in 1991 at my instigation but when it comes to exes, pride it seems has no expiration date.

So the lesson in this? I adore my ex brother and sister-in-law yet there is every chance that I would have let embarrassment over my weight stop me from seeing them. I know too that I would have been mortified to have bumped into someone I knew from my past when I was 3.5 stone heavier whereas now it wouldn't bother me at all and one of my biggest fears was that someone would organise a school reunion which I'd feel duty bound to attend. No one has, yet, but at least if they do now, I'll be able to go with my head held high.

I've allowed being overweight to impact on my life in so many ways and it's so great to have my self-imposed restrictions gradually stripped away.

 

[becci-boo]

hi cate was wondering where you had gone too. yes why can't we resist those gorgeous chocolate eggs they even taste nicer than a bar why? i know what you mean when you wanted to look good in front of your ex's brother i would have done exactly the same as you, if i was heavier then i would have made up some excuse for them not to come too. it just shows that your confidence is growing and growing and you are starting to like the way you are looking about yourself and so you should, you have done amazing and what an achievement in your loss. well done and keep going. x

 

[bye-bigun!]

Hey you! I have been wondering where u had gone too! I won't even discuss Easter eggs, evil things! Lol! Here's to getting back on track n in that zone! ... I can't wait to get back on tfr once I am recovered!

So, I completely understand how u feel and tbh think its really normal! It's certainly part of the pride thing and why not ay! After all of that hard work and such a physically noticeable achievement then its right to want to show it off, esp to the ex! Icing on the cake (evidence pun!) Being that ex has not fared as well as u! BONUS

Should be back property very soon myself, I am awake at this ungodly hour as my internal stitches just popped in bed! Massive panic! Now so scared to move I can't sleep! Lol! No viewable liver yet so I guess no drama! Lol!

Take care and here's to getting back on the wagon! Xxx

 

[chunkychops]

ha ha ha x luvved this!!! there is nothing better than an ex who looks bad whenyour feeling great! theres a pay off for hard work in itself! well done you and as for the evil easter eggs......cadburys always tastes nicer in eggy form for sum reason....we must all revert to childhood! heres to your last few pounds...the end is in sight x

 

[Leluna]

aahh you're back! Was worryin bout ya hoped you hadn't gone off the wagon... and sure it was only a lil ol wagon topped with easter eggs!!! So that's behind us now.... bout this ex well absolutely delighted for ya girl.... great you looked so fab and he looked like a bag of spanners..... AND i dont blame ya one bit about your bro and sis-in-law... I used to live in Jersey and since i piled on the weight, sometimes very good friends of mine have been to Dublin for hen parties etc... and coz id piled on the podge... i would tell them i was not here... i was in the UK for a work thing or whatever... how sad... and i would miss them dearly and feel so bad coz they were only miles from me, but i couldnt go coz i looked crap.... its just disgusting what weight does to us..... so glad you're back and the damage is minimised!! good luck on the next round of the journey! x

 

[morlycarly]

I know just what you mean, a cousin who I havn't seen for 25 years has the dreaded C and not long to live, I have actually instigated a get together and I know I wouldn't have thought about doing that a couple of months ago, how bad is that

 

[Jessie 888]

Aw Cate, it's so good to have you back! I know just what you mean about those damn eggs. I bought loads for all my nephews and nieces but couldn't trust myself to have them in the house so I kept them in the boot of the car. Then came that lovely hot weather so by Easter Sunday they were one big melted mess!
I really laughed at your post and could completely understand and echo those feelings. As I admitted on an earlier thread, once in my twenties I went on a diet just to show an ex-boyfriend what he was missing! I still remember the look on his face - shameful but true!

 

[ThatLiverpoolLad]

As long as you've done the tft for yourself& nobody else. The there's nothing wrong with rubbing it in there faces hahaha xx

 

[frankiec]

Great to read that other people have let weight rule their life in the same way - misery loves company!!
I hate going anyway when I'm overweight -don't even want to go somewhere that I wouldn't meet anyone - in fact I got to the point at one stage that I hated getting up as I'd have to figure out what to wear!! I'm not there yet, but on my way - and then I'll be the one that wants to go out at the weekend or the one buzzing to do this, that and the other!!
At the moment, it's great to have clothes that fit and options on what to wear! (and to be putting on tracksuit for comfort-wear, not for necessity)

 

[abouttime]

love this story, we have a family party this weekend and I am so glad I will be two stone lighter than the last one!!